


The Jigsaw Edit

by AlcatrazOutpatient



Series: The Flip Side Universe - Alternative Takes on Detroit: Become Human [2]
Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: David Cage can fight me in a pit, Essay Series, Meta, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-17
Updated: 2020-12-05
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:20:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 23
Words: 58,812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26511295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlcatrazOutpatient/pseuds/AlcatrazOutpatient
Summary: In which I attempt to edit and re-structure this beautiful dumpster fire of a game into something a bit more palatable.
Series: The Flip Side Universe - Alternative Takes on Detroit: Become Human [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1927561
Comments: 36
Kudos: 14





	1. Introduction

When I first sat down to write _Konami Code_ , I don't think I could have imagined the response that I would get. Just over a year in, this one fanfic has gifted me with brilliant new friends and a genuine appreciation for the characters we meet within _Detroit: Become Human_. The branching narrative and stunning backdrop helped draw us into this game, despite the plethora of 'WTF David Cage' moments that we all knew would be littered throughout the story.

 _Konami Code_ started as a way to tackle some of the more... _cringe-ier_ aspects of DBH before it evolved into something more. But through several conversations with my incredible commenters, it made me wonder: if I could rewrite the canon storyline, how would I go about it? _Konami Code_ is technically one way of accomplishing this task. Still, it doesn't translate into the branching narrative at the core of DBH's gameplay.

And so, this side project came into being.

I understand that I'm probably going to make choices that not everyone will agree with. We all have our own biases and opinions, after all. And while I want to put my own thoughts out there for others to consider, I will not try to force them on anyone. All I ask is that the same courtesy is given in return. If you would like to debate, discuss, or disagree with anything I write, please do so in a constructive manner, and I will do the same.

**Ground Rules**

As I am also in the middle of writing another fic with similar goals to this essay, I figure that I need to lay out a few rules before I begin. I don't want to make this a retelling of _Konami Code_ because, as state above, it would not translate well into the video game's original format.

Starting with the most obvious rule: the three main POVs that we see in DBH must remain the same. That means that despite Cage's reveal that [the original draft had a fourth POV character](https://www.reddit.com/r/DetroitBecomeHuman/comments/8t2p1k/hey_im_david_cage_writer_and_director_of_detroit/), there will be no new playable characters in this rewrite. I've created this rule to ensure continuity between the canon game and this new version. I really want to continue to explore how DBH uses Markus, Kara, and Connor to examine various aspects of love and how they apply to the understanding of ourselves as living beings. Having romantic, familial, and platonic love being shown as equally powerful forces in a person's struggle for self- and universal-acceptance is genuinely beautiful and should be maintained.

This idea feeds into our second rule: the aspect of love that each POV explores (i.e., Markus and romance, Kara and family, and Connor and friendship) must remain the same. This will be why _The Jigsaw Edit_ won't see the inclusion of a romantic bond between Luther and Kara despite my eternal love for their ship. And more contentiously, we will be sticking to the canonical interpretation of the relationship between Hank and Connor. Which, according to the highest level of their in-game Relationship Stat, is a _platonic friendship_. And no: I will not be discussing anything else about that beyond this declaration within this essay series.

Rule number three: the game must start on November 5th, 2038 and end on November 11th of the same year. The only exception to this rule will be _The Hostage_ chapter, which must occur on its canonical date of August 15th, 2038. If writing _Konami Code_ has taught me anything, Markus's and Connor's plotlines can be vastly improved with an extended timeline. However, Kara's story starts to fall apart. And since she will be the backbone of this rewrite, I am absolutely willing to take the hit to the other two POVs if it means that her story gets the respect that it deserves.

Rule four: all the canonical chapters seen in the game must occur in _The Jigsaw Edit_. However, they do not have to appear in the same order that they do in _Detroit: Become Human_ , nor does their chapter's contents have to look anything like it does in the game. For example, the new version of _Zlatko_ will be a Connor POV, while the _Kara Captured_ branch of _Battle for Detroit_ will be reworked into a Markus POV. This way, _The Jigsaw Edit_ has the potential to be vastly different without being completely unrecognizable.

Finally: if I add, alter, or remove something from the original storyline, I _must_ provide a reason for doing so. Now, in a few cases, that reason might just be, "This is fucking stupid. What the hell were you thinking, David?" But for the most part, I will do my best to 'show my work' so that I can explain the narrative rationale behind each change that's made throughout _The Jigsaw Edit_.

**Major Changes**

Before we dive directly into a chapter-by-chapter analysis of DBH, I think that we first need to talk about some of the overarching alterations that need to be made to the actual gameplay. These changes aren't precisely chapter-specific, so I'm going to get them out of the way early.

Stats to Scales

The first change that needs to be addressed is how DBH's Gameplay and Relationship Stats will be represented within this rewrite. In canon, each Stat is presented on a rating system that rises and falls depending on the player's actions. But what this does is create a sort of Up=Good/Down=Bad subtext that plays directly into how this game frames the Pacifism vs. Violence aspects found throughout the game, especially in regards to Markus's entire storyline.

To combat this, I propose that all the Stats be transformed into a left-to-right sliding scale, regardless of whether they are centred around Gameplay or the developing Relationships found throughout the game. This way, it presents all of the player's actions as equal to one another, allowing all the branches of the narrative to be seen on a similar footing.

The Uprising Scale

The above change was also made to support this next alteration: merging the Jericho Relationship Stat and the Public Opinion Gameplay Stat to create the new and improved Uprising Gameplay Scale.

The reasoning behind this new gameplay mechanic is two-fold. For one, it addresses the inherent issue of Markus acting as the Leader for the majority of the game regardless of what the Jericho Relationship Stat reads. Not to mention that the only time that this Stat unlocks anything special is if you have an Unpopular Status, leading Markus to be rejected from Jericho. And even then, the player can have him return to 'save' Jericho during _Crossroads,_ taking back the position of Leader from North during _Night of the Soul._ The entire 'Markus Return' plotline negates the point of the Stat existing in the first place, while also fundamentally going against one of the main selling points of this game.

One of my main gripes with DBH is that it was marketed as a game where every choice results in a consequence down the road, and then absolutely _fails_ at delivering on that promise when it involves a character that isn't Connor. If you are going to create a Gameplay Stat that asks the player, "What if Markus is a shit leader?" then you better be prepared to back that up with an answer. Because the one we receive in-game is that Markus's failures don't actually matter. North's Revolution always fails, which tells the player that the only way to 'win' is to have Markus at the helm regardless of his ability to do his job well. This not only whittles Markus's importance down to, "Well, he's just got to be there," but is probably one of the many, _many_ contributing factors to why North gets as much hate as she does within this fandom. By restructuring how the Jericho Relationship Stat works into this new Uprising Scale, we can fix some of these problems.

Secondly, the Public Opinion Gameplay Stat only comes into play during a few specific endings, while being utterly useless in all the others. While a Supportive Public Opinion can mean the difference between life and death during _Markus's Demonstration_ , it does absolutely nothing for the player during _Markus's Revolution_. And while you think that this Stat would assist Kara while she and her family are crossing the border, it actually doesn't. Should Kara choose not to sacrifice anyone and Markus is attacking the camp, the guard will turn on her regardless of what the Public Opinion Stat reads. On the other hand, if Markus wages a bloody war across Detroit but chooses to protest at the last minute, Kara will be spared. Once again, the Public Opinion Stat has no influence on her storyline and is therefore rendered useless in the one place where it should have mattered the most.

Therefore, by combining the two Stats, we can use the new Uprising Scale to reflect something completely different. It will track Markus's actions throughout the game, unlocking gameplay options for the Uprising to follow in the later chapters of the game. It will also decide the Uprising's success-rate depending on how far one veers away from the center.

Reframing Markus's Paths

Building off the reasoning behind transforming the Stats into sliding Scales, all negative framing of the original Violent Path needs to be removed from the game's script. At the same time, all positive language associated with the Pacifist Path must also be taken out. They will also be renamed as the Revolution and Rebellion Paths, continuing to remove any potential stigma with their original nomenclature. They will both achieve access to the Survivor's Trophy, both come with their own individual love interest, and play off the introduction of the new Uprising Scale.

By doing this, we are not only going to present the former Violent Path as a favourable option to achieve victory but also removing a lot of the 'saving the masses from their savage, base instincts' crap that is littered throughout the game. The most obvious example of this is with North. Of the three main Jericrew members, she's the only one who is dismissive of the human death tolls, with Josh and Simon being shown as the more 'reasonable' members of the group. North is who that hands Markus the Molotov cocktail in _Capital Park_ (something he can refuse, which isn't an option for the more 'pacifist' smoke bomb), advocates against the Freedom March and then immediately wants to attack the police (which again, is something that Markus gets two chances to back out of, which isn't an option of the pacifist approaches) and presents Markus with the dirty bomb as a last resort during _Crossroads_ (which again, he can refuse). And yet, she is shown to be significantly happier during the victorious version of _Markus's_ _Demonstration_ than she is at the end of a successful assault on the camps - as if she has 'seen the light' and now knows better than she used to.

It continues on with the Jericho NPCs that we can listen to throughout the game. During the early sections of _Crossroads_ , we can see that the androids on Jericho are not just calling for Markus to use violent actions, but want _blood:_

> "Well, I'm willing to fight. We can't just let them slaughter us!"  
>  "We gotta kill the bastards!"  
>  "We've got to avenge our dead!"  
>  \- Background dialogues, _Crossroads - Connor_ and _Crossroads - Kara_

The androids in _Capital Park_ will not only tell Markus that they want him to kill Chris and his partner as an act of revenge. However, they will _always_ shoot them if Markus gives them back the gun - regardless of what message he decides to send during the scene just a few minutes prior. This continues into how Markus's own choice to spare Chris is shown as a 'teaching moment.' Simultaneously, his decision to shoot them is implied to be him falling for the temptation of violence (combine this with North being the representative for the Violent Path and her history with sex, and we get a pretty revolting implication here). Put all of this into context next to the constant push that the player experiences to play the Pacifist Path, and there is some gross subtext that can get removed just by removing all of the negative bias surrounding the former Violent Path.

But we must also remember that Markus has three canonical Paths. Therefore, we must also address _The Jigsaw Edit_ 's version of the Failure Path. Just like with the former Violent and Pacifist Paths, the Failure Path will be renamed as the Neutral Path, mirroring the point on the Uprising Gameplay Scale that must be attained to unlock it. As the name suggests, the Neutral point will be dead center on the Uprising Scale. It can be achieved by either having Markus fail multiple missions or flip-flop between Revolutionary and Rebellious tactics to achieve his end goal. It will also have a unique love interest as well as a chance at victory. However, it will be unable to unlock the Survivor's Trophy for reasons that will be discussed when we get to this version of Markus's _Battle for Detroit_.

The purpose of the Neutral Path is to answer the question, "What happens if Markus is a shit leader?" Because unlike in the game, he will not be exiled and will remain the Leader until he dies or wins the Uprising. Jericho will be stuck with him and will have to deal with the consequences of having the person in charge be incompetent. This will limit the options that Markus (or his successor) will have to obtain success in the face of annihilation.

And speaking of successors...

Adding Additional Leaders

In _Detroit: Become Human_ , Jerich can have three people fill the role of Jericho's Leader. The first is Markus, with North taking over if he dies. However, since North's Revolution always fails, a deviant Connor can take her place if he survives the events at CyberLife Tower. And yet he can never be genuinely victorious, as Connor is taken over by Amanda at the last minute and must either commit suicide to escape her grasp or live on as a puppet to her whims.

As discussed earlier, I've come to suspect that much of this fandom's hatred toward North's character has derived from the fact that her becoming Jericho's Leader automatically spells doom for the Uprising. And while I acknowledge that there are misogynistic factors at play here, I also believe that many of these people were partially led there by what they saw in the game.

To counteract some of this hatred, _The Jigsaw Edit_ will feature seven potential Leaders of Jericho. Each of the Jericrew characters (i.e., North, Josh, and Simon) can assume the Leader position should precise specifications be met before Markus's death. They will all have the opportunity to have their Uprisings succeed or fail based on the player's actions. And should they fail in their task, a deviant Connor will have the chance to take their place at the last moment.

However, Kara can also become Jericho's Leader during either _Crossroads_ or _Night of the Soul_ , should a particular set of conditions be met. This will result in her being given her own version of _Night of the Soul_ , as well as the creation of an entirely new chapter called _Battle for Detroit - Jericho's Last Hope_. Should Kara die in this chapter, and if Connor is both deviant and survives, he can lead Jericho in her stead. If both Kara and Connor die, the seventh and final Leader will take over - though the identity of this character will only be revealed when we finally reach this chapter.

Kara's Story is Important

Kara was done dirty, y'all.

Valorie Curry and Kara are the reasons that we have _Detroit: Become Human_ in the first place. Kara's story is the foundation on which this game was built, as her narrative is the only one that makes sense within the week-long timeline. This is why it was such an insult for her to be the only character that got not just one, not just two, but _five_ permanent deaths before her 'Get Out of Death' free card was introduced - with more than half of those deaths occurring during her second chapter.

Kara has the largest number of permanent deaths out of all three main characters, with twenty-one spread across her entire story. In comparison, all thirteen of Markus' deaths occur during and after _Freedom March_. He also gets two death fake-outs early on, when he is shot in _Broken_ and if North has to rescue him during _Spare Parts_. On top of that, Markus gets three 'Get Out of Death' free cards in the form of John, Simon, and North, who will sacrifice themselves for him right up until the final moments of the game. And then there's Connor, who was written to be his own Dues ex Machina. So while it's technically possible of 'kill' Connor forty-one different ways, all but one of his sixteen permanent deaths occur in the final moments of _Battle for Detroit._

Therefore, Connor and Markus will always make it to the midpoint of the story, with Connor all but guaranteed to become the endgame's sole survivor. In comparison, Kara's entire storyline can be eliminated very early on without any lasting impacts on the overall gameplay. This is why she often isn't viewed as necessary to the plot and can be side-lined in favour of her male counterparts.

Not to mention that Kara's entire storyline is rife with abuse at the hands of men. She goes from suffering under Todd's domestic violence, to Ralph threatening her with a knife, to Connor putting her in danger for the sake of his mission, and then only Zlatko fucking Andronikov. If she manages to survive all of that, Kara must escape Todd _again_ in the most poorly written attempt at a redemption arc that I've ever seen. And worst of all, the ending of Kara's entire storyline depends on Markus deciding between the Demonstration and the Revolution instead of, you know, _her own fucking choices?_ Like this game promised that it would allow it's player to do? Because the only Gameplay Stat that Kara can contribute to doesn't mean shit to her in the long run?

And this shit doesn't stop there. The most terribly handled part of Kara's narrative takes place during _Crossroads_ and just goes to show how little the writers actually cared about developing her character.

If Kara abandons Alice during _Crossroads_ and refuses to search for her during the raid, her story straight-up ends. You don't play as her for the rest of the chapter, and she is entirely absent from both _Night of the Soul_ and _Battle for Detroit_. The next time we see her is in an after-credits scene, where she wanders the streets of Detroit before stumbling upon an advertisement for a child android identical to Alice and is implied to feel guilty about her actions. Not only does this have some very dark implications about the [Teaser Advertisement that she stars in](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pelrr__9qx8), but it's also a slap in the face to her as a character.

It's completely fine to write your leading female character as a mother or mother-figure. But if you can't imagine her as her own person outside of her relationship with that child, then that's a different problem steeping in age-old misogynistic media tropes. And that's what happened when Cage wrote himself into a corner with Alice's Relationship Stat (you know, the literal anchor that Kara's storyline is written around?). He was so invested in showing Kara gaining self-autonomy through motherhood that he was unable to write what her story would look like if the player asking, "What if Kara and Alice don't like each other?" Which is, you know, the question that the Alice Relationship Stat has the player to ask.

Like, come on, David. You cannot base the plotlines for two of your POV characters around questions that you have no answer to, especially when using the Choose-Your-Own-Story format. This isn't rocket science: it's Writing 101. And I know that this isn't a foreign concept to you, because you could successfully pull it off with Connor.

If Connor proves incapable of showing empathy, Hank will lose faith and commit suicide in one of the most heartwrenching scenes in the game. And unlike with Markus and Kara, there isn't a single button you can press to convince Hank to stop - _and that's the fucking point_. The player doesn't get to go full-tilt down the Machine Path without facing the consequences of their actions, which is what you promised we'd be able to do if we bought your game. If you can do it for Connor, you sure as hell could have done it for Kara and Markus.

Stop playing favourites with your POVs. It exposes you for the shitty writer that you are.

These are all just a few of the reasons why improving Kara's storyline will be one fo the main focuses of _The Jigsaw Edit_. She has the potential to be so crucial to his game, and I really want that to shine through. For this reason, all of Kara's permanent deaths before _Battle for Detroit_ have been removed, guaranteeing that she will enter the endgame alongside Connor. The _Kara Captured_ branch will be replaced with a new _Kara Alone_ path, which will focus on what happens if she is Distant from Alice. On top of that, Kara can become Jericho's Leader and will be the forefront of the entirely new chapter, _Battle for Detroit - Jericho's Last Hope_.

Because Kara matters. Because she has _always_ mattered. And because fuck you, David Cage, for shitting all over the story that Kara and Valorie Curry allowed you to tell. They deserve so much better than you.

**Final Notes**

For the ease of discussing the thirty-two chapters of _Detroit: Become Human,_ I will be taking a page out of the MCU's book and dividing the game up into phases. Phase One will include much of the introductory chapters and will conclude upon Kara's arrival at Pirate's Cove. From there, Phase Two will take advantage of the 'gap-day' in the canonical timeline, allowing for me to reformat the order of several chapters to tell the game's story more cohesively. Phase Three will explore everything from Stratford Tower to Freedom March. And finally, the ambitious Phase Four will focus on the conclusion of Markus's Uprising, either with him at the help or with Jericho's other Leaders following in the wake of his death.

Thank you to the mods that maintain the [Detroit: Become Human Wiki](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Main_Page) and the anonymous fan who [transcribed the entire game](https://detroitbecometext.github.io/chapters). A special thank you to [Video Game Sophistry](https://www.youtube.com/user/VideoGameSophistry) for all your 100% Walkthroughs. Your efforts have been utterly invaluable throughout this entire endeavour.

And most importantly, thank you to Pegasus143 and rabbit_in_a_lizard_mask, who are the main inspirations behind why I chose to embark on this journey. Your friendship means more to me than I can hope to describe, and I hope to continue our conversations for years to come.

Before I conclude this section, I do want to provide a terminology section, as I will be using specific descriptors to refer to various events within either the canonical game or the new _Jigsaw Edit_ timeline. So here's an easy reference guide that may be updated as things progress:

  * **Violent Path:** Refers to the various canonical events that result in a negative influence on the canonical Public Opinion Gameplay Stat.
  * **Revolutionary Path:** Refers to the various events in _The Jigsaw Edit_ that result in a left-tilt of the Uprising Gameplay Scale.
  * **Pacifist Path:** Refers to the various canonical events that result in a positive influence on the canonical Public Opinion Gameplay Stat.
  * **Rebellious Path:** Refers to the various events in _The Jigsaw Edit_ that result in a right-tilt of the Uprising Gameplay Scale.
  * **Failure Path:** Refers tot he various canonical events that result in a negative influence on the canonical Jericho Relationship Stat.
  * **Neutral Path:** Refers to the various events in _The Jigsaw Edit_ that result in no change to the Uprising Gameplay Stat.
  * **Revolution:** Can refer to either the canonical conclusion of the Violent Path or _The Jigsaw Edit's_ conclusion to the Revolutionary Path that takes place during Markus's POV in _Battle for Detroit_. Due to the similarities between the two events, they are often referred to using the same terminology. The context will be provided in the section that this term is mentioned in.
  * **_Markus's_ _Revolution:_** Specifically refers to both the canonical and _The Jigsaw Edit's_ arcs titled _Markus's Revolution_ in Markus's POV of _Battle for Detroit_. Due to the similarities between the two events, they are often referred to using the same terminology. The context will be provided in the section this term is mentioned in.
  * **Demonstration:** Refers to the canonical conclusion of the Pacifist Path that takes place during Markus's POV in _Battle for Detroit_.
  * **_Markus's_ _Demonstration:_** Specifically refers to the arc titled _Markus's Demonstration_ in Markus's version of _Battle for Detroit_.
  * **Rebellion:** Refers to _The Jigsaw Edit's_ conclusion of the Rebellious Path that takes place during Markus's POV in _Battle for Detroit_.
  * _**Markus's Rebellion:**_ Specifically refers to the newly created branch titled _Markus's Rebellion_ in Markus's version of _Battle for Detroit_.
  * **Uprising:** Used as an umbrella term to describe Jericho's actions under the various Leaders that can take control, both in canon and in _The Jigsaw Edit_.
  * _**Uprising Gameplay** **Scale:** _A newly created Gameplay dynamic that reflects the direction that Jericho's Leaders decide to take the Uprising in. It is shown on a left-to-right sliding scale, with the points of Revolutionary, Confrontational, Aggressive, Neutral, Resistant, Defiant, and Rebellious presented for the player to achieve unlockable gameplay dynamics.
  * **Public Opinion Gameplay Stat:** Refers to the canonical Gameplay Stat that has been eliminated from _The Jigsaw Edit_ and replaced with the Uprising Gameplay Scale.
  * **Leader:** Refers to whoever is in charge of Jericho at any point in the game. This usually refers to Markus, but can also refer to North, Josh, Simon, Connor, Kara, and the unknown seventh Leader.
  * **Lover:** Refers to Markus's unlockable romantic partner. When talking about DBH's canon, this term will only refer to North, as she is the only character able to achieve the Lover status. But within the context of _The Jigsaw Edit_ , it may refer to either North, Josh, or Simon, should the player reach both a specific point on the Uprising Gameplay Scale as well as achieve the rank of Companion with one of the three romanceable characters.
  * **Machine Path:** Refers to the various events within both canon and _The Jigsaw Edit_ that cause a lowering of Connor's Software Instability Gameplay Stat/Scale
  * **Deviant Path:** Refers to the various events within both canon and _The Jigsaw Edit_ that cause a rising of Connor's Software Instability Gameplay Stat/Scale
  * **Mother Bear Path:** Refers to the various events within _The Jigsaw Edit_ that cause a rising of Kara's Alice Relationship Scale
  * **Lone Wolf Path:** Refers to the various events within _The Jigsaw Edit_ that cause a lowering of Kara's Alice Relationship Scale



So, with that all out of the way, let's jump right in!


	2. Phase 1-1: The Hostage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _The Hostage_ is the first chapter of _Detroit: Become Human_. This chapter has six different outcomes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Date:** August 15th, 2038  
>  **Time:** 08:29 PM  
>  **Player:** Connor  
>  **Location:** Phillips' Apartment
> 
> Connor must race against the clock to save Emma Phillips, who has been taken hostage by a deviant android named Daniel.

In all honesty, _The Hostage_ is pretty good the way it is. It performs its function as a high-octane cold open perfectly and introduces us to everything that this game promises to be. Connor's actions have consequences, his character as both an android and a person is established, and the player walks away ready for more.

While I wouldn't change anything about _The Hostage_ on a purely narrative level, I would say that it needs to have more importance to the story at large. And frankly, we've already got multiple pre-established connections that we can build on. The most obvious way is to somehow include a link between Simon and Daniel, as they are both the same model of android and share a mocap actor. The character of Captain Allen is used during the rooftop scene in _Connor's Last Mission_ , so he is an established member of the DPD cast outside of this one chapter. And while I will address how I plan on using _The Hostage_ to help grow the characters we meet within it as well as their impact upon the story at large, I do want to address one issue that comes up within this chapter.

Emma's mocap actress, [Audrey Boustani](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Audrey_Boustani), also portrays Alice and the unnamed child android that Kara meets during _Crossroads_. As a result, all three characters share the same facial design, even though two are mass-produced androids, and the third is human. This results in a bit of a plothole because [just seeing Audrey's face contributes to the reveal of the Android!Alice twist](https://youtu.be/l6a1tfMyvlA?t=544) \- so what does this all mean for Emma?

I think, had this been done in isolation, it might have been easier to gloss over. But the fact is that DBH goes out of its way to play with having multiple character with the exact same face, like with all three of [Amelia Rose Blaire's](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Amelia_Rose_Blaire) characters in _The Eden Club_. And in the instances where an actor plays different characters who can't have the same face, their design is heavily altered that it becomes impossible to tell, like in the cases of [Neil Newbon](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Neil_Newbon) and [Bruce Sherfield](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Bruce_Sherfield). Hell, we even see the problem Audrey faces dealt with within _The Hostage_ itself with [Ben Lambert's](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Ben_Lambert) portral of the PL600 series. And DBH doubles down on this by having the fact that Simon looks precisely like Daniel [part of the cliffhanger at the end of _Jericho_](https://youtu.be/jBBQfxLPmhw?t=1543).

Basically, by telling us that anyone who has Audrey's face is an android while simultaneously establishing Emma as a human, you run into a pretty big contradiction on a replay. Therefore, the most prominent alteration that needs to take place in _The Jigsaw Edit's_ version of _The Hostage_ is that Audrey Boustani cannot play both Emma and Alice.

Ideally, I'd like to have an Asian actress play Emma to match [her original character design](https://www.artstation.com/artwork/AJBOy), or alternatively, have a black actress play Alice. I've always been quite bothered by [both instances of whitewashing regarding Audrey's characters](https://lechet.tumblr.com/post/177317251807/david-cage), though I don't put the blame on her shoulders considering how young she was at the time. And frankly, given that [her mother](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Barbara_Weber-Scaff) has played several roles in Quantic Dreams other titles over the years (including Caroline Phillips and Hostess Chloe in _Detroit: Become Human_ itself), it’s not hard to figure out why Audrey got her casting calls. At the end of the day, the adults at Quantic Dream are the ones who should known better, and the fault will always be on them. But by doing this recasting, we are not giving a young actress of colour the opportunity to shine in a mainstream game but also solving the problem of having the exact same facial design for multiple characters that are both human and android.

The final alteration is a small gameplay change that needs to occur because of the creation of the Uprising Scale. While Connor can become Jericho's Leader, he is not in that position _yet_ and therefore cannot affect this scale at this time. Therefore the canonical uptick to the Public Opinion Stat that occurs if the player saves the injured cop on the balcony does not take place. To make up for this, I suggest the inclusion of a slight instance of Software Destabilization should Connor choose to make this decision, implying that helping this man is counterproductive to what CyberLife and Amanda sent him here to accomplish. It will also establish a nice little parallel between this moment and Connor's decision to save the fish earlier in the chapter.


	3. Phase 1-2: The Opening

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _The Opening_ is the second chapter in _Detroit: Become Human_. This chapter has only one outcome.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Date:** November 5th, 2038  
>  **Time:** 03:24 PM  
>  **Player:** Kara  
>  **Location:** Hart Plaza CyberLife Store
> 
> Kara awakens into her new life with no knowledge of her past.

Just like with _The Hostage_ , this cutscene of a chapter plays its role perfectly. Between the sombre music and the limited gameplay, the player gets to sit back and relax as they are introduced to the setting they will be exploring throughout this game. We are reintroduced to the character of Kara, who we haven't seen since the [Tech Demo](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j-pF56-ZYkY) back in 2012, and are immediately dropping into the mystery that will be the driving force of her first few chapters.

And while I will always roll my eyes at the ham-fisted way that Quantic Dream handled the connection between the Tech Demo and DBH, I still want to have our Kara be the same one who stepped off that platform eight years ago and told us that she was alive. By doing this, we will not only be providing Kara with a life before what we see in the game but also begin to establish who she is outside of her relationship with Alice. Then, by actively addressing the events of the Demo and how that life was stolen from her by the memory wipe we see in _The Opening_ , we can build Kara up as an independent being on par with the likes of Markus and Connor.

Other than that, I would also like to change the location that _The Opening_ takes place in. In canon, Kara awakens in a store called Android Zone, which appears to be where one can purchase used androids at a discounted price. And while this does wonders to establish that Kara's owner as someone who's clearly on a budget, I'm also sick and tired of the constant attempt to make me care about Todd's story over the two women he tries to brutally murder at multiple times during the game.

(FYI: I hate Todd more than any other character in DBH, and that's going to show through in every instance that I write him in. So just... be prepared for that.)

At the same time, while we do technically see another Android Zone during the _Kara Leaving Detroit_ branch of her endgame chapter, they don't play any other role outside of what we see here. So I propose that we change the location of _The Opening_ to the [Hart Plaza CyberLife Store](https://youtu.be/p8-wtDwsgBc?t=2909).

By doing this, we will form a bookend between the start and end of the game, as Hart Plaza is the location of Markus's version of _Battle for Detroit_. This specific CyberLife Store is also where Jericho's Leader can retreat to should things go wrong during the Revolution. So not only is the player given a chance to scope the store out beforehand, but it also creates a much-needed connection between Markus and Kara's storylines while simultaneously closing the tale of Jericho's first and last hopes off in one neat narrative bow.

 **EDIT:** After doing some thinking about how I was going to approach one of my core problems with the end of the series, I decided that I actually need to change the location of _The Opening_ once more. Therefore, instead of having Kara be repaired at either the Android Zone or the Hart Plaza CyberLife Store, she will now be starting her journey at [CyberLife Tower](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/CyberLife_Tower).


	4. Phase 1-3: Shades of Color

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Shades of Color_ is the third chapter of _Detroit: Become Human_. This chapter only has one outcome.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Date:** November 5th, 2038  
>  **Time:** 09:38 AM  
>  **Player:** Markus  
>  **Location:** Greektown, Detroit
> 
> Markus is running an errand and sees all that is wrong with the world along the way.

_Shades of Color_ is one of my favourite chapters because it gives us an in-depth look at the glorious worldbuilding that went into every nook-and-cranny of this game. Sadly, it was all promptly thrown in the trash because Cage decided to base DBH around an absolutely tone-deaf comparison to real-life instances of racism rather than follow-up on the anti-capitalist theme that runs deep throughout this chapter. Therefore, our first significant change to _Shades of Color_ is that we're going to respect what it establishes and us it as the foundation of Markus's entire storyline - because _that is what your protagonist's introductory chapter is supposed to be used for, David_.

(Oh, and yes: Markus is the protagonist of _Detroit: Become Human_ \- full stop, end of story. I don't care how much Quantic Dream's marketing strategy wants us to think that it's Connor the Tragic White Boy. The entire fucking game is about the androids' fight to be recognized as living beings, and Markus literally leads the charge into that particular battle. Connor, on the other hand, does everything in his power to stop Markus. Because he's _the bad guy_.)

Anyways. Back to the main topic...

To facilitate the entire game's transition from misappropriated racism to _Shades of Color's_ anti-capitalist themes, the members of the protest group that we meet during this chapter have to become reoccurring characters. Now, I will admit to being fond of them and believe that that's probably why I picked them over anyone else that we meet in this chapter. But within the context of _The Jigsaw Edit_ , this group will be used to visually show the public's changing opinions toward androids while also pointing the finger at this game's actual villain: CyberLife.

That being said, a lot of the protestors' dialogue needs to be changed to fit this alteration. I understand that French is the first language for most of Quantic Dream's writing staff, but some of their lines are a bit clunky (I'm actually interested to know if the protest group's lines flow better in French, so if anyone has any information, please let me know.). Also, there needs to be some changes to the Lead Protestor's speech, shifting their anger toward a more anti-CyberLife stance than an anti-android one.

Let's try this instead:

> **Lead Protestor:** CyberLife is stealing our future! We've got families to feed and they keep making androids to take our place!  
>  **Crowd:** YEAH!  
>  **Lead Protestor:** 35% unemployment! Millions out of work! But CyberLife puts up record profits year after year!  
>  **Crowd:** YEAH! FUCK THAT!  
>  **Lead Protestor:** We want jobs! We want to feed our children!  
>  **Crowd:** WE - WANT - WORK!  
>  **Lead Protestor:** Hold the rich accountable NOW! What do we want?  
>  **Crowd:** WORKERS' RIGHTS!  
>  **Lead Protestor:** When do we want them?  
>  **Crowd:** NOW!

We also need to change what happens during Markus's assault, as there there are some rather charged implications about an angry crowd pulling a black man off the streets with the intent of beating him to death over a perceived slight. The problem that we face is that we need to de-escalate the racial implications behind this scene, while also having the protestors cause enough of a stir to bring the police officer over to investigate. What I propose is that we utilize the street busker that's already in this chapter, moving him to the other side of the fountain and having Markus stop to watch the man in a mandatory cut scene at the end of the chapter:

> [Markus stops to listen to the music]  
>  **Lead Protestor:** [stops shouting and looks over at him] What the hell is it doing?  
>  **Protestor:** No idea. But look at what it's got in it's hands!  
>  **Lead Protestor:** Fucking hell. I can barely afford to put food on the table and this guy's master has him buying paint? Who the hell can afford those luxuries these days?  
>  **Woman:** Never seen an android with that face before. It's probably a custom model. Those things are expensive. I bet whoever owns it is loaded.  
> [Close up on Markus's face, implying that he is somehow 'specifial.']  
>  **Lead Protestor:** Hey! You!  
> [Markus turns around and faces the Lead Protestor]  
>  **Lead Protestor:** What the fuck's you're function?  
>  **Markus:** I'm a nurse.  
>  **Lead Protestor:** A nurse, huh? [Turns to face the crowd] Anyone here used to be a nurse?  
>  **Protestor:** YEAH!  
>  **Lead Protestor:** [Approaching Markus] CyberLife shoves you into our jobs, takes all our money, and leaves us out to starve in the streets! How are we supposed to live like this, huh? How are we supposed to survive?  
>  **Policeman:** [Approaching from off-screan] Alright, that's enough. Leave it alone.  
>  **Lead Protestor:** I'm not fucking touching it, asshole.  
>  **Policeman:** You damage it, I'm gonna have to fine you.  
>  **Lead Protestor:** [scowls, points at the huge CyberLife billboard that hangs over the plaza] They're gonna take your job next! We'll see who's laughing then...  
>  **Policeman:** Okay... Let's go, move along.  
> [Markus moves away, pauses, and then looks back at the Lead Protestor, imitating how he looked back at the little girl at the start of the chapter]  
>  **Markus:** I'm sorry.  
> [Markus walks away. The Lead Protestor and his group look on, confused]
> 
> [End Chapter]

Hopefully, with this new version of the script, we can remove a lot of the implication of racial violence that the first edition had while simultaneously ensuring that _Shades of Color's_ theme of anti-capitalism is being respected. It also leaves room for the protest group to come back into the story later on without having to worry about them being codified as 'bad guys.' Instead, they can be presented as fellow victims of the system, and therefore giving them the potential to be allies.

It also allows us to inject some character development into Markus early on. I mean, ignoring the fact that Markus only has a single line in all of _Shades of Color_ , most players often walk away from this chapter knowing absolutely nothing about him as a character. This way, we establish that Markus is already capable of experiencing empathy in a way that Kara and Connor are nowhere even close to being able to emulate. We also learn his function: Markus is a nurse, differentiating him from Kara's position as Todd's housekeeper. He's owned by a wealthy artist. He likes music and the finer things in life. And most importantly, Markus is described as a 'custom model,' meaning that he is special in a way that other androids aren't. All of this will help build up his status as the protagonist and have the player walk out of _Shades of Color_ wondering who the hell they just met.

(Also, can I just say that having Markus be the only POV character that _doesn't walk around wearing CyberLife branding_ was absolute stylistic genius? Because it subtly shows the player that he's not associated with the enemy, even though CyberLife spends his introductory chapter literally hovering over his head like the Eye of Sauron. Seriously, hats off to whoever made that decision.)

I also think that Rev. Gordon Penwick needs to be removed. As much as I find his heavy-handed prophetic foreshadowing hilarious, _The Jigsaw Edit_ will see the removal of all other overt religious discussions. Penwick's sermon would just seem out of place if it was kept in _The Jigsaw Edit_. Also, should destiny have a place at the table in a story about free will and self-agency? Especially if that destiny predicts a destructive future for Markus that only really happens if he sets off the bomb? Which again, is something that this game goes out of the way to convince the player to reject because 'violence is bad in all situations always?' Unless you're playing as Connor, in which case, leaving a bloody trail of corpses in your wake just makes you look awesome? Because white violence is cool but black anger needs to be toned down for it to be marketable?

(I'm not screaming to the high heavens about how Deviant!Connor has twice the body count as his Machine counterpart, therefore making the push for Markus to be a pacifist in all situations fucking hypocritical because the coveted Survivor's Trophy is still built on a mountain of dead bodies regardless of this fandom's attempt to paint over the bloodstains so that we can have our 'morally righteous canon victory.' Except I totally am.)

On that note, let's also get rid of the android compartments on the back of the buses. Not only is that a terribly misappropriated piece of imagery, but Markus is also fully capable of travelling for long distances on foot without getting tired. Carl isn't getting up for a while, so it's technically cheaper and more efficient for Markus to just walk home. I mean, that's literally how he arrived in Greektown in the first place.

Finally, we must address the most significant change that will be made to _Shades of Color_ : the policeman that intervenes during Markus's confrontation with the protestors is no longer a nameless NPC. Instead, it's Chris Miller. This change was made to set-up a small subplot that will occur throughout the first half of Markus's storyline that will help establish him as a character going forward as DBH progresses. I will discuss the finer points of this as we continue on, but it does have a significant pay-off down the line.


	5. Phase 1-4: A New Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _A New Home_ is the fourth chapter of _Detroit: Become Human._ This chapter has only one outcome.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Date:** November 5th, 2038  
>  **Time:** 04:53 PM  
>  **Player:** Kara  
>  **Location:** Todd Williams' House
> 
> Kara returns home after being repaired and is immediately sent to do the chores around the house. She was allegedly damaged after being hit by a car, but she slowly learns that that might not be the truth.

I will defend _A New Home_ to the death.

I know that most people find it incredibly jarring to go from saving Emma in _The Hostage_ to washing Todd's dirty dishes within half an hour. But doing the housework is not the point of _A New Home_ because it's technically a two-part chapter. We scope out Todd's house, travelling from room to room and unlocking the secrets behind each door so that when shit goes down in _Stormy Night_ , we're ready to go. Now, admittedly, _A New Home_ loses it's purpose after the first playthrough, as the player already knows where to go. But much like with _Shades of Color, From the Dead,_ or _Waiting for Hank..._ , these chapters are essential to the first-time player experience and shouldn't be dismissed just because they're not as fun on a replay.

Now that that's been said, let's move onto our first significant change to _A New Home,_ shall we? Todd's not getting a redemption arc.

While I understand that Todd is another victim of the world he lives in, it is his actions that make him wholly unsympathetic. His final canonical scene during _Kara Leaving Detroit_ feels like it was shoehorned in at best, and the most pathetically written attempt at reconciliation at worst. Todd is the monster that tried to kill Kara in the past and terrorized the little girl that she has learned to love. So why the _fuck_ should she give a shit about his story? If anything, the explanation of why Todd bought a child android in the first place should have been given to Alice, which she can reveal after being unveiled as an android on Jericho.

As a result of this change, opening Alice's treasure box in _A New Home_ will unlock that dialogue during _Crossroads_.

And that brings us to the second major change: Kara doesn't discover a pamphlet for a YK500 in the house. Therefore, she does not know that Alice is an android throughout her journey and is not suppressing that knowledge like she is in canon. Because I'll be honest: this has always seemed like something the developers pulled out of their asses at the last minute to fill a massive pothole. But on an in-game level, these changes need to be made for Alice's sake.

The reason why Todd originally purchased Alice was that he wanted to play House, with Alice filling the role of the daughter he lost. If Kara figures the truth out early on and actively decides to suppress/ignore it so that she can pretend Alice is human, then Kara is just a continuation of the trauma that Alice experienced under Todd. By having the truth littered throughout the game (like how North's backstory is shown to the player in bits and pieces), it allows the player to have an 'Ah-ha!' moment alongside Kara during _Crossroads_ and gives us all the opportunity to show Alice that Kara's love for her is truly unconditional. Simultaneously, it also allows for a very dark interpretation of Kara, who can openly reject Alice for not fitting her narrative of the 'perfect family.'

But after those two changes, the rest of the alterations are relatively minor and don't change the story too much. For one, I think that Alice should walk down the stairs at the beginning of the chapter instead of mysteriously appearing when Todd asks where she is. The original version seems somewhat contrived, especially for a game that pushes for a degree of realism. But this change will also give those who are replaying the game a chance to realize that the Alice shown in _A New Home_ is not deviant yet and must still follow Todd's orders despite not wanting to. This can put her in the same boat as Kara, as she discovers that her master is not who she thinks he is.

I also believe that Kara shouldn't find any Red Ice in the laundry room. Instead, this should be the location of the gun, as the 'backyard quest' is an optional directive and the player will be less likely to discover it on their first try. This move will also give the game a chance to connect some of the events of _The Hostage_ with Kara's storyline, as she will be unable to pick up the gun until she deviates. This in turn will hint that Connor is something else entirely, as he can wield a weapon and indiscriminately kill despite still being under the influence of his programming.

Continuing on, I think that should find divorce papers in Todd's bedside table rather than his anti-depression medication. This will help to remove some of the 'mentally ill people are prone to violence' crap that Cage likes to play with, both here with Todd and later on with Ralph. It also removes some of the 'excuses' that Cage is trying to give Todd for his behaviour as the warnings on the bottle say that the medication makes people prone to mood swings - as if to say, "What happens in _Stormy Night_ wasn't really Todd. It was his medication!" Which even if it was, it still does not, in any way, excuse Todd's behaviour, no matter how much the writers want to throw this stupid redemption arc in our faces.

However, I do believe that finding the divorce papers should unlock the MOTHER? dialogue during Kara's conversation with Alice in her room. The script for this choice has been changed to:

> **Kara:** I know about your parents' divorce. Does you mother still live nearby?

Much like the original canon, this dialogue option will result in Alice's Relationship Scale being pushed toward Distant. This means that the player will have to work a bit more to receive the Warm level Kara needs to unlock the treasure chest. It also sets up that Alice doesn't actually have a mother, or perhaps even resents Todd's wife for leaving him because it led to her being purchased. Either way, this whole interaction reveals a mother-shaped void in Alice's life, which is something that Kara has the potential to fill.

The final changes are all regarding Todd and how he acts throughout the chapter. As I mentioned before, I will not attempt to hide how much I despise Todd and do understand that's why I've chosen to exacerbate his status as the villain in Kara's origin story. As a result, I think that Todd should pull Kara into the house if the player has her look too long at the construction site, rather than have him wait for her at the front door. This timed gameplay mechanic would be similar to how Hank will tell Connor to hurry up during the first section of _The Eden Club_ , should he stare too long at the androids in the display cases. By doing this, we can start to show Kara as someone who appreciates the beauty of nature, which is something that we see through her POV when she compliments the snow. And we get another parallel between her and Markus, matching up with how he stops to listen to the busker at the end of the previous chapter. Of course, Todd (and the world at large) has no use for an android with feelings, so he tugs her away from her musings and immediately puts her to work at something useful to him.

Once inside the house, the conversation that Todd has on the phone should mention Red Ice, as some of the streamers that I've watched playing this section get confused by the strange noises that he starts making after he hangs up. Therefore, after Kara gives him the beer from the fridge, the cut scene continues to show him using the drug before going back to the regular gameplay.

Also, Todd's canonical monologue at the end of the chapter should be cut short before he apologizes to Alice. This is done to take away any set-up or hope for his unnecessary redemption arc. Once again, I realize that Todd is a victim of the game's economic climate, but the reason why his wife ran off with their kid was that he _terrified_ her. Just because he gets sad about it later does not excuse the fact that he attempts to kill the two slave women he bought to play House.

Todd doesn't get a redemption arc. Because fuck that guy.


	6. Phase 1-5: The Painter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _The Painter_ is the fifth chapter of _Detroit: Become Human_. This chapter has only one outcome.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Date:** November 5th, 2038  
>  **Time:** 09:58 AM  
>  **Player:** Markus  
>  **Location:** Carl Manfred's House
> 
> After returning home from his errand, Markus cares for his master before being asked to think critically about his environment.

_The Painter_ is another wonderful chapter that showcases the life that Markus will be forced to leave behind when he deviates. For this reason, most of the changes that will take place are small enough to not alter the overall story while adding in a few more layers of depth to the narrative.

The first of these alterations revolves around the canaries in the house's front foyer. I think that Markus should be given a choice to activate the birds rather than automatically doing it after the player approaches the cage. Not only will this foreshadow Markus's eventual ability to assist androids in their own deviation, but it will create a parallel between this moment and Connor's choice to 'Save the Fish' during _The Hostage_.

These actions contribute to the larger metaphor at play, where both Markus and Connor _are_ the respective animals they save. Markus the canaries in their gilded cage to life, but will be unable to do that until he steps beyond the bars of his own prison. Meanwhile, Connor is the fish that's suffocating slowly on the floor, but a small show of empathy will be enough to save him. The three-fold metaphor culminates with Kara, who takes action to save her own fish/canaries when she rescues Alice from Todd's wrath in _Stormy Night_.

After that, I think that Markus should be barred from exploring the rest of the house until he wakes Carl up. By doing this, it allows for the mansion's other rooms to be revealed in tandem with the chapter's narrative. It also ensures that the player isn't forced to stand around while Carl paints because Markus has already cleaned up the studio beforehand.

I also believe that Markus needs to cook Carl's breakfast before serving it to him. This will establish some much-needed parallels between Markus and Kara, as they are notably absent throughout the game. At the same time, having pre-cooked eggs and bacon still be hot when they hit the table was a pretty big blow to my suspension of disbelief when I first played this game - though I do attribute that to me being a chef in real life.

Finally, we need to alter one of Markus's paintings, replacing the ANDROID-HOPE piece with a new one called ANDROID-LOVE. Here, Markus will paint a shadowy figure kissing him while their hands touch in an interface. This change was made because Markus's storyline serves to explore the aspect of romantic love, so this will foreshadow his eventual romance while keeping his partner's identity a secret.


	7. Phase 1-6: Partners

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Partners_ is the sixth chapter of _Detroit: Become Human_. This chapter has two different outcomes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Date:** November 5th, 2038  
>  **Time:** 11:21 PM  
>  **Player:** Connor  
>  **Location:** Jimmy's Bar, Carlos Ortiz's House
> 
> Connor is sent to find Lieutenant Hank Anderson and accompany him to the investigation of a murder committed by a deviant android.

_Partners_ is a classic David Cage chapter, as it shares multiple similarities with the _[Crime Scene](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZkjUJnF5qYw) _chapter of Quantic Dream's previous game, [_Heavy Rain_](https://heavyrain.fandom.com/wiki/Heavy_Rain). And while much of the narrative will remain the same in _The Jigsaw Edit_ , the changes that will occur will modify a lot of the impact that _Partners_ will have on the story at large.

Firstly: all mentions of rA9 have been removed. This means there is no scene in Carlos Ortiz's bathroom and no statue for Connor to use during _Last Change, Connor_. Instead, a map book can be discovered in the closet that Connor can open in this chapter, which will eventually lead him to Ferndale Station.

However, rA9 hasn't just been removed from _Partners_. The entire rA9 side plot has been eliminated from the whole game.

rA9 was built up throughout DBH as a mystery that needed to be solved so that the player could truly understand the reasons behind deviancy. But when it came time to finally answer _yet another question that Cage asks us to think critically about_ , he has Kamski tell us that because spiritual belief itself is irrational. This informs the player that our quest to answer "Who/What is rA9?" is utterly meaningless, and we should all feel bad for wanting to solve the mystery - with all of this taking place in from the POV of our detective character.

Not only is that incredibly insulting to anyone religious and/or spiritual who has decided to pay for this game, but it also shows how little Cage cares about set-up and pay-off within his own stories. To have him come in at the last minute with his Asshole Atheist Avatar to tell us that we're all stupid for trying to answer a question he posed in the first place is just plain _dumb_. I'm agnostic myself, but I also understand that's only one belief system amongst thousands of others. Believing in a lack of the divine doesn't make your smarter or better than someone who thinks otherwise, which is a lesson that [Cage](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Cage#Personal_life) has clearly yet to learn.

The reason behind rA9's removal from _The Jigsaw Edit_ (as opposed to answering the question itself) is a two-fold answer. For one, I have my own ideas about who and what rA9 actually is, but I'm also using them within _Konami Code_ and don't want the two stories to be carbon copies of each other. But also: it's actually easier to remove rA9 altogether than it is to answer the question, as it doesn't play a role in any of our POV character's stories. Axing the entire concept means that I don't have to reshape the game around the gaping plothole left behind by the absence of an explanation for rA9.

The next significant change that needs to occur is that Officer Chris Miller cannot be in _Partners_. Since Chris will be involved in _Broken_ and these two chapters take place around the same time, he cannot be in two areas at once. As a result, all of his actions and dialogue will be given to Tina Chen, an extremely minor character that this fandom has taken a liking to.

The expansion of Tina's character will also solve another problem within Connor's story. Not only is his POV a bit of a boy's club, but Connor can also kill almost every single female character that he interacts with within the game. The only exception is Amanda, but even then, that's an ambiguous answer as her fate is left up in the air following Connor's use of the Zen Garden's emergency exit. Therefore, by including Tina in this chapter, we add a female character into Connor's story that he's unable to kill while also allowing Chris to participate in _Broken_.

Next, all mentions of the Eden Club will be removed from this chapter. While North's past will continue to be the same as it is in canon, we will be using this opportunity to set up the backstory of another one of the Jericrew members instead. Therefore, instead of reading the incredibly heteronormative magazine article titled _Android Sex_ , a new article named _Android Professors_ will be added to explain what Josh was initially built for.

Finally, the remaining magazine article, _Android Spy_ , will be treated as a piece of evidence. Its discovery unlocks of Connor's dialogue options during _The Interrogation_ , where he can imply that Ortiz became violently paranoid of his android after reading it.


	8. Phase 1-7: Stormy Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Stormy Night_ is the seventh chapter of _Detroit: Become Human_. While this chapter originally had nine different outcomes, _The Jigsaw Edit_ will see that count reduced to three.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Date:** November 5th, 2038  
>  **Time:** 09:14 PM  
>  **Player:** Kara  
>  **Location:** Todd Williams' House
> 
> The player has to use their knowledge from _A New Home_ to help Kara and Alice escape from Todd.

While I acknowledge that one of my main criticisms of Kara's arc is that it revolved around her being a near-constant victim of male violence, I still want to keep Todd's attack in _The Jigsaw Edit_. I'm hoping that by removing all of Kara's permanent deaths from this chapter, we can reframe the events of _Stormy Night_ as her Call of Action rather than the first in a series of moments where there is a genuine threat to her life.

Therefore, the canonical endings of _Todd Killed Alice, Todd Broke Kara Outside, Todd Broke Kara Downstairs_ , and _Todd Broke Kara in the Corridor_ no longer exist. Instead, the point of this chapter is no longer about whether or not Kara can escape Todd but instead explores just how far Kara is willing to go to save herself and Alice from their old lives.

As a result, this means that Kara's deviancy can no longer be framed as a choice (though if the option is "Do the thing or this character's story will end before it can begin," is it really a choice, David? Because you were able to answer that question with a resounding _no_ when it came to Connor death scenes in _The Hostage._ ). Much like with Markus in _Broken_ , Kara will immediately be confronted with the red wall after Todd starts his temper-tantrum in the living room, with each option to break through it being mandatory.

As the gun is now located on the ground floor, Kara has to decide to take it before going upstairs. If she does choose to go for the gun, she will reach Alice's bedroom after Todd, and the game will continue as it does in canon. As taking the gun always ends with Todd dying, his death will now unlock new dialogue options during _On the Run_. And just like in the game, Kara can use the gun again throughout the rest of her story.


	9. Phase 1-8: Broken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Broken_ is the eighth chapter of _Detroit: Become Human_. While this chapter originally has two different outcomes, _The Jigsaw Edit_ will see the addition of a new third option to that line-up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Date:** November 5th, 2038  
>  **Time:** 09:42 PM  
>  **Player:** Markus  
>  **Location:** Carl Manfred's House
> 
> Markus and Carl come home to find an unexpected visitor, forcing Markus to make a choice that changes everything.

_Broken_ is another chapter that serves its purpose well. It gets Markus away from Carl, while also setting up the central internal conflict he faces throughout DBH. Initially, that question was: does Markus choose Pacifism or Violence to get the job done? And _Broken_ takes a really innovative approach by providing an answer that says, "Well, when Markus has no power to make effective changes, [both options mean jackshit at the end of the day](https://konami-code-ao3.tumblr.com/post/618744404244578304/compatible-deviancy-lost-tanuki)."

But while _Broken_ does an outstanding job at laying out the consequences for Markus's actions, _Night of the Soul_ does everything in its power to clear those murky waters and present our hero's complex choices as undeniably virtuous. And that's not what this game promised us that it would be.

Even though DBH repeatedly frames the Violent Path within a negative light, there are some moments where the player has to have Markus use violent measures to ensure the mission's success. The most obvious of these moments is when the player chooses between [shooting or sparing Evan Thompson in _Stratford Tower_](https://youtu.be/P1INT3NchS0?t=1053). If you kill him, the SWAT team doesn't arrive, and the entire Jericrew makes it off the roof. But if you allow him to escape, Simon is wounded and unable to make the jump. And while there are technically consequences for leaving Simon on the roof, there is also the Kitchen Work-Around that allows Simon to escape undetected and return to Markus. And considering how rare it is to get [Simon's version of Capitol _Park's_ introductory scene](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N7P-VfpNZq0), it goes to show that not trusting the player enough to actually face the consequences of questionable decisions results in them taking the easy way out more times then not.

(Also: isn't it interesting that Simon is the only non-POV character to get his own set of 'Get Out of Death Free' cards? It takes the sacrifice of the unnamed android in the Tower's kitchen and John throwing himself at a police execution squad to keep Simon alive. Honestly, Markus's entire plotline is practically jumping through hoops to ensure Simon makes it to _Battle for Detroit_.)

For this reason, if the player has Markus push Leo, Leo dies when his head smacks against his father's chair lift. Despite my love for Leo in _Konami Code_ , I've always felt like his survival here was a copout. But now, Markus's actions in this chapter have more weight to them, while also removing the "Violence is only good when there is a work-around ready to cover your ass" implication that this fandom really capitalizes on.

Of course, we also have to address the issue of _The Jigsaw Edit_ presenting the Neutral Path as a viable option for the player to travel down, ensuring that the original dualistic nature of Markus's original response (Push vs. Endure) now being obsolete. That means that we have to introduce a Neutral Path alongside our establishment of the Revolutionary and Rebellious Paths _right now_. And while Markus's actions at the end of the chapter do not affect the Uprising Gameplay Scale (as that measures Jericho's ideology, and Markus isn't on Jericho just yet), it will do wonders for establishing Markus's personality going forward.

For that reason, there will be three options that the player can choose from in the immediate aftermath of his deviation. He can either convince Leo, push Leo, or let the QTE's timer run out and ignore Leo all together.

Oh, and by the way: Leo isn't going to be in the middle of robbing his father. He's going to be in the middle of a Red Ice trip, high on his own paranoia like Todd - once again connecting Markus and Kara's origin stories. But this change results in the significant alteration of what happens during his confrontation with Markus.

If the player attempts to convince Leo, they will get into an argument with each other rather than have Markus stand in stoic silence. The script will go as follows:

> **Leo:** I'm gonna destroy you, then it'll just be me and my Dad... I'm gonna tear you apart and nobody's gonna give a shit. You know why?  
>  **Markus:** He'll never love you. Not like he does me. I take care of him. I'm more his son than you'll ever be!  
>  **Leo:** You're nothing! You're nothing, you hear me?!

At this point, Carl collapses from a heart attack and dies in the same manner that he does in canon. Markus will get this heartfelt goodbye before the police arrive to shoot him at Leo's directive.

Now, we've already talked about what happens if Markus pushes Leo. But what I also want to get across that Leo's death is now being used to state point-black that there will be blood regardless of which Path the player has Markus follow. There will _always_ be consequences to his actions because the people he is rising up against don't want him to and will do everything in their power to kill those around him until he shuts the fuck up. Because standing up for your rights as an individual and rebelling means that the people at the top of the pyramid can no longer profit from your suffering. So while people will die when Markus takes to the streets to shout his truth, it is better to choose a method of fighting back than it is to stay quiet.

And this leads us into the third option: the player allows the QTE to time out and Markus does nothing. This is our symbolic version of the Neutral Path, which the player can access by refusing to choose one side over the other. In doing so, Carl still has a heart attack and dies, but Leo also collapses amid an overdose. Unable to save either human, Markus is alone and surrounded by bodies when the police show up. This change is made to show the player that while death is inevitable during the Uprising, refusing to take risks will result in more casualties than if you had tried to make a stand.

These changes will also result in a massive cross-chapter impact during Markus's version of _Night of the Soul,_ which will be explored in more detail when we get to that point. However, I will say that the graveyard scene will only occur if both Leo and Carl are dead, meaning that Markus can spend _Night of the Soul_ with either surviving Manfred, depending on his choices.

And finally, we have the scene where Markus is shot by the police officer. As discussed in _Shades of Color_ , the NPC officer that pulls the trigger will be replaced by Chris Miller. This is done to continue on through the small subplot that is threaded throughout most of Markus's earliest chapters.


	10. Phase 1-9: The Interrogation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _The Interrogation_ is the ninth chapter of _Detroit: Become Human_ and the first chapter that's accessibility is determinant on the player's actions in a prior chapter. This chapter has four different outcomes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Date:** November 6th, 2038  
>  **Time:** 12:41 AM  
>  **Player:** Connor  
>  **Location:** Detroit Police Department Central Station
> 
> Upon returning to the precinct, Connor interrogates the deviant with the intent of extracting a confession.
> 
> (cw: discussions of police brutality, brief mentions of Harry Potter)

_The Interrogation_ is our first optional chapter, with its playability determinant on whether or not Connor completed his mission during _Partners_. This will not be the last optional chapter in the story. But it proves that if Quantic Dream could manage it here, then they sure as hell could do it again later on.

In terms of changes, let's get the hard part out of the way first: we need to talk about Gavin Reed.

Regarding his actual narrative function, Gavin plays the same role as Leo Manfred. They are both used to introduce an element of personal danger to an otherwise safe space that the POV is exploring. [Neil Newbon](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Neil_Newbon) has spoken at length about how Gavin was never supposed to be anything more than to be a [supporting character that got the player to feel sympathy for Connor](https://youtu.be/XY26NQLUG1c?t=2088) and that he's genuinely shocked at the response that Gavin has gotten amongst fans.

Now, there is certainly something to say about how the DBH fandom has taken a minor supporting character with little-to-no backstory and breathed life into him, transforming Gavin into someone flawed but overall likeable. As of writing this post, Gavin has been tagged in [over nine thousand fics](https://archiveofourown.org/tags/Gavin%20Reed/works) on ArchiveOfOurOwn, with [almost half of that number having him being paired off with the RK900 we see for nine seconds at the end of Connor's Machine Path](https://archiveofourown.org/works?utf8=%E2%9C%93&commit=Sort+and+Filter&work_search%5Bsort_column%5D=revised_at&include_work_search%5Brelationship_ids%5D%5B%5D=24153632&work_search%5Bother_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bexcluded_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bcrossover%5D=&work_search%5Bcomplete%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_from%5D=&work_search%5Bwords_to%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_from%5D=&work_search%5Bdate_to%5D=&work_search%5Bquery%5D=&work_search%5Blanguage_id%5D=&tag_id=Gavin+Reed). The most incredible example of the work that this fandom has put into Gavin is [Octopunk Media](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UChoSAd3ja0WUe7PQ8S5KjPA)’s [Detroit Evolution](https://youtu.be/apUn-YMMdZ8), a fan-funded feature-length film that focuses on his story following the conclusion of the game. These achievements should be celebrated for the phenomenal feats of fandom excellence that they are because I don't think I've ever seen something quite like this anywhere else.

I love Fandom!Gavin. I use him all the time in _Konami Code_ because he's an interesting character that I can work into the story that I'm trying to tell. Sure, Fandom!Gavin is an asshole, but he's _our_ asshole - one that we've come to love and care for genuinely.

Here's the problem: we're not going to be dealing with Fandom!Gavin in _The Jigsaw Edit_. We're working with Canon!Gavin. And frankly, Canon!Gavin isn't someone that I'd want anywhere near a position of power.

Because Canon!Gavin is a metaphor for police brutality.

Of course, I'm pretty sure that this is an unintentional metaphor. David Cage strikes me as the person that likes telling detective stories without looking into the larger implications of what placing one within a narrative about systemic violence perpetrated by the state actually means. But I also think that he _does get it on some level_ but doesn't really want to think about it too much. Because while Gavin was just supposed to be a dick, he's repeatedly shown to be something much more.

Gavin is portrayed as aggressively anti-android, which is this universe's equivalent of saying that he's a violent racist. He also repeatedly pulls a gun on a member of the 'oppressed class,' even going as far as threatening one with setting him on fire. Not to mention that his narrative arc can conclude with him admitting that he's wanted to kill Connor since the moment he saw him simply because he's an android, and then proceeding to do exactly that.

I don't know about you, but that's not behaviour that I'd associate with someone who's _just a dick_. And to think otherwise can only be described as willful blindness.

[sighs]

As a self-described Fandom Old, I've seen this song and dance far too many times before. It reminds me a lot of my first experiences in the Harry Potter fandom back in the mid-2000s, where 'woobifying' characters like Draco Malfoy and Severus Snape were (and still are) all the rage. Because the fact of the matter is, Gavin Reed is this game's Edgy Boy in the same way that Connor is our Tragic White Boy. And we've all collectively gravitated toward them for exactly one reason.

I think one of my friends said it best:

> "Gavin's the epitome of 'white violence is cool.'"  
> \- Pegasus143, Comment on Chapter 9 of _The Jigsaw Edit_

Now, I'm not saying that most of us are doing this consciously, nor am I implying that this fandom is full of secret racists who love Gavin as a way to cheer on acts of police brutality. But I'm also not saying that we all don't have some ingrained shit that we've not only got to recognize when it pops up but actively call out when we see it.

Because as a fandom, we've gone out of our way to downplay and excuse the crap we see Gavin do while openly dismissing the actions of characters of colour who played pivotal roles in DBH's plot. And it's happened often enough that this has become something that really needs to be discussed more within our fandom spaces.

(Again: this isn't to say that you can't like Gavin because he's #toxic. People can like problematic things for whatever reason they want without judgement. But it's one thing to talk about stuff like this on an individual level and another to discuss it as a trend within a group of people.)

However, much like what I've talked about with how this fandom views North, I also firmly believe that we've been partially led into our conclusions about Gavin with how this game goes about portraying its choices and consequences. For example, the various acts of violence that take place within Connor's POV seem to be the notable exceptions to DBH's rule of 'violence is bad in all situations always.' And a lot of that is due to its cast of conventionally attractive white men and the media's internet bias toward portraying violence as cool so long as it's not from women and/or people of colour. If you want an excellent example of how DBH can influence someone to think like this, I suggest watching [Jacksepticeye's playthrough of _Crossroads_](https://youtu.be/LC6qxcawTq4?t=4220). He literally spends most of the chapter's fight scenes being worried about Markus and Kara fighting back against the soldiers trying to kill them. But when Connor makes his charge in the chapter's final moments, he's suddenly cheering and calling him a badass. And while I am not in any way saying that Sean is actively racist here, you can see how this game goes about rewarding the played for seeing Connor's POV as an exception to its rule regarding the inherent evilness of violence.

For this reason, by having Gavin be apart of Connor's supporting case, we've been primed to accept his actions as just part of what makes his character interesting. Combine this with the cultural narrative of being more accepting of white male violence in the media (especially when it comes from cops), and we've got a textbook formula behind why Gavin has become as popular as he is. And I think now is a good time for me to get to the damn point regarding why I'm bringing all of this up now.

If you've come here hoping that _The Jigsaw Edit's_ version of Gavin is going to look like how he's perceived by fandom, or even how he's portrayed within _Konami Code_ , I'm going to break it to you right now: that's not going to happen. Because while Gavin will be getting a small subplot alongside Chris Miller, his story will focus on becoming the human version of Machine!Connor as well as emphasizing the role that police often play within rebellions against a corrupt state.

And that's all going to start here with how Gavin is portrayed in _The Interrogation_. If I'm going to be honest, not much is going to change as he already fits the part of a cop that's high on his own power the moment we're introduced to him. The only alteration that needs to occur regards the scene at the end of the chapter when Gavin enters the interrogation room. This is when we need to establish Gavin as less of a cartoonish annoyance on the player's side and more of a serious threat to the lives of the androids and deviants around him.

The deviant that Connor captures in _Partners_ has three death scenes within _The Interrogation_. They've aptly been titled _Deviant destroys itself, Deviant shoots itself_ , and _Deviant shoots Connor and itself_. The first death occurs if the deviant's stress level is at 100%, and Connor gives up when he attempts to self-destruct. Simultaneously, the option for committing suicide via the gun only happens if Connor successfully interrogates him but refuses to intervene when it gets anxious about being taken back to its cell. The third and final option, where the deviant kills Connor in a murder-suicide, happens if the deviant is either too stressed and Connor attempts to intervene or if Connor fails to pressure him properly and doesn't attempt to intervene. In all of those situations, the deviant is the one that makes the call, acting upon Connor's interactions during _The Interrogation_.

Which is great. And it's exactly what this game promised that it would be.

The only change that I'd like to make regards the two deaths that the deviant has where Connor isn't shot. So instead of having the deviant commit suicide by either smashing his head into the table or stealing a gun and shooting himself, I suggest that we have Gavin kill him instead. And regarding the third murder-suicide death, I think that it should be shown that Gavin had his gun our and _was planning to go through with it_ , but the deviant was too quick and stole his gun from him.

By making this change, we set up right from the beginning that Gavin is someone very dangerous working within the police force. It will also make his later mocking of Connor in _Waiting for Hank..._ downright cruel, implying that he feels minimal regret about what happened in _The Interrogation_. And at the same time, it will also contribute to some more understanding of Gavin's character in the branch where he _doesn't_ get to shoot the deviant.

[Gavin’s Gallery Bio](https://youtu.be/FjlU1MgYths?t=1107) implies that he's "ruthlessly ambitious" and "unapologetically arrogant," while also being willing to "do anything to advance his career, even if it means treading on other peoples' toes." And that's a fascinating aspect to his character, one which probably would have been explored if we got to see the deleted timeline branch where [Gavin becomes the Central Station’s Lieutenant](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ni6WezkEvzU). And while we don't get to witness that side of Gavin within the game we were given, we will see some aspect of it within _The Jigsaw Edit_.

During the branch where Connor successfully keeps the deviant's stress level at the optimal levels and then intervenes when he gets scared later on, Gavin will still pull his gun and threaten to shoot Connor. Hank will put a stop to it as he does in the game, but the scene will play out like this:

> [Connor positions himself between Gavin and the deviant]  
>  **Connor:** I can't let you do that! Leave it alone, now!  
> [Gavin pulls his gun and points it at Connor]  
>  **Gavin:** I warned you, motherfucker!  
>  **Hank:** That's enough!  
>  **Gavin:** Mind your own business, Hank.  
>  **Hank:** I said 'That's enough.' Or are you forgetting who still has to sign off on your Sergeant's exam?  
> [Gavin scowls and puts away his gun]  
>  **Gavin:** Fuck. Fuck you, Hank. You won't get away with this! [Leaving] Fuck!

(Also, in this version of the scene, Hank doesn't pull his gun on Gavin because it's a wildly uncharacteristic move for Hank to pull, who is repeatedly shown to let bullshit coming from other humans roll of his back like water. But it also plays into that 'white violence is cool' dynamic that's littered throughout Connor's POV cast, and we're going to be doing everything in our power not to encourage that kind of thought here.)

(And also because it was fucking stupid, David. What the hell were you thinking?)

By doing this, we're showing the player the character traits described in Gavin's Gallery Bio and setting up the fact that he is willing to act upon those desires without fear of consequence. This will set Gavin up as a villainous character, allowing the player to feel some form of sympathy with Connor even though he's DBH's main antagonist.

Besides the whole Gavin situation, there are a few more changes that need to take place in this chapter. The most obvious alteration will be the continued swapping of Chris Miller with Tina Chen. Once again, this is done because Chris is currently shooting Markus during _Broken_ and cannot be in two places at once.

Other than that, the rest of the changes are mostly script-based. Because of the removal of all references to rA9, Connor cannot ask about it or the statue in the bathroom as he does in canon. Instead, Connor can ask about the map book that he finds in the closet, which will trigger the following dialogue:

> **Connor:** The book of maps in the closet. What was it for?  
>  **Deviant:** To find a place to stay... A place to be free...

Connor can also choose a new dialogue option, which is replacing the rA9 unlockable option. This option will be labelled PARANOIA and will only be available if Connor reads _Android Spy_ during _Partners_ :

> **Connor:** Red Ice often makes humans paranoid. Is that why he attacked you? Because he thought you were spying on him?  
>  **Deviant:** He blamed androids for losing his scholarship at the university. He said that if we weren't watching him, he would still have a chance.

This change was made to flesh out exactly what caused Ortiz to attack his android in the first place, filling in a small pothole that the canonical script left open. At the same time, it also established that the player should take the time to actually read the magazines, as they will occasionally contain information about the plot and characters. Because not only does this moment do all of this, but it contains some foreshadowing for certain events that happen in later chapters.

Finally, because the deviant's canonical dialogue at the end of the chapter refers to the secret map inside the statue, it needs to be changed. Instead, he will say:

> **Deviant:** Come to me when you're ready to learn the truth.

While a first-time player will think that this dialogue refers to when Connor speaks with the deviant during _Waiting for Hank..._ , a returning player will know that he's actually talking about when Connor resurrects him during _Last Chance, Connor_ \- which will now be an option.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There have been some minor edits done to _The Opening_ chapter.


	11. Phase 1-10: Fugitives

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Fugitives_ is the tenth chapter of _Detroit: Become Human._ While this chapter's playability was originally optional, _Fugitives_ will now always be a part of the gameplay.
> 
> This chapter has three different outcomes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Date:** November 5th, 2038  
>  **Time:** 10:58 PM  
>  **Player:** Kara  
>  **Location:** Camden, Detroit - Landromatic, 24 Convenience Store, Eastern Motel, Abandoned House, Abandoned Parking Lot
> 
> After escaping Todd, Kara and Alice need to find a place to stay for the night.
> 
> (CW: brief mentions of sexual assault)
> 
> (Slight spoilers to the plot of _BEYOND: Two Souls_ )

_Fugitives_ is my absolute favourite chapter in _Detroit: Become Human_ because it is everything that this game should have been. In this chapter, Kara is charged with finding a place to stay for the night. The conflict comes from Alice, who wants a warm bed and a roof over her head but disapproves of everything Kara must do to accomplish that feat. Alternatively, while sleeping in the parking lot is something that Alice hates, it is actually the safest of the three locations to stay and results in them remaining relatively undetected throughout _On the Run_.

 _Fugitives_ does a brilliant job of showcasing that 'morally correct' and 'lawfully good' are two halves of a Venn Diagram - they may have some overlap, but they are still two distinct circles. _Fugitives_ trusts the player enough to allow them to deal with a complex moral dilemma, having them play out multiple versions of a no-win scenario with zero outside judgement. And then this beautifully woven tapestry of moral complexity that could have been paralleled throughout Markus's journey was promptly thrown in the trash right alongside _Shades of Color_ so that Cage could shout at people from atop his high horse that wanting to punch a racist makes you just as bad, if not worse, than the racist themselves.

Unless, of course, you're an attractive white guy. Because then it's just cool.

Fuck. That.

Todd's violence may be what drove Kara and Alice from their home, but it was also what allowed them to escape in the first place. I mean, there's literally a branch in _Stormy Night_ where Kara learns that there's nothing you can say to get a person that hates your existence to get them not to want to kill you. In turn, both pacifism and violence can be used to greatly affect _Fugitives_ , telling us that so long as Kara makes the point to act, she and Alice can achieve some form of 'victory' over their current situation.

Therefore, much like with _Shades of Color_ , the biggest change that we're going to make with _Fugitives_ is that we're going to respect what themes it establishes and use them as a baseline for what we want to show with the rest of the story.

There are a few gameplay changes that I think should happen in this chapter. For one, I think that the player should _have to_ steal the wire cuttings from the convenience store if they want Kara and Alice to stay in the squat. This is done to remove the workaround presented by the Squat's backdoor entrance via the Parking Lot. By doing this, the game now trusts the player enough to justify committing a crime to get where they want to go. This becomes double-y true if they want to stay at the motel, as Kara will have to steal both clothing and money just like she does in canon.

The next major change is that Kara does not meet the android that directs her to Zlatko. This is because, as mentioned in the Introduction, _The Jigsaw Edit's_ version of _Zlatko_ has been repurposed into a Connor POV, so Kara never actually goes there. This is because _Zlatko_ is just a Gothic Horror AU of _Stormy Night_ , and Kara shouldn't need to survive Todd 2.0 all over again to make the player care about her story.

Other than that, the rest of the alterations are quite minor. I'd like it if Kara could actually spot the highway that she can cross during _On the Run_ before hitting the edge of the map. It obviously doesn't unlock anything, much like spotting the alley beside Todd's house in _A New Home_ doesn't unlock Kara's ability to jump the fence in _Stormy Night_. But it would be a nice detail to add in to set up where Kara and Alice are heading should the cops catch sight of them.

Next, I'd like to replace the magazine article titled _Face the Music_ found inside the laundromat with another article called _Market Decline_. Its contents will specifically discuss how the once highly popular PL600 has been superseded by newer and better models, which is what we can learn when we read [Daniel’s Bio in the Gallery](https://youtu.be/HKnrbjdDYd4?t=288). And while this can fill in any of the player's questions as to why the Phillips' were planning on replacing Daniel, it will also work to foreshadow some of Simon's backstory.

Obviously, all references to rA9 have been removed from the Squat. As a result, some of the dialogue that occurs if Kara talks to Ralph in the kitchen must be changed. Instead of carving rA9 into the walls, Ralph is attempting to care for a small cat. Their conversation goes as follows:

> **Kara:** Thank you for letting us stay here. We promise to be gone by morning.  
>  **Ralph:** It's... It's fine. Ralph is just used to being alone.  
>  **Kara:** Is there no one else here with you?  
>  **Ralph:** No. No... Not anymore...

This change was made for a few reasons. For one, by having Ralph care for a cat, we are further enforcing the claim Connor makes about deviants being obsessed with animals. It will also set up the new driving force that Kara has to deal with during the Squat Branch of _On the Run_. As opposed to the creepy faux-family scene in canon, Kara will have to convince Ralph to overcome his loneliness to help her and Alice gain something that will help them on their journey forward. Also, this removes yet another male character who Kara and Alice are expected to survive while also getting rid of some of the harmful 'Unstable Mentally-Ill Character' trope that is prevalent throughout Ralph's depiction.

After that, some of Alice's monologue at the end of the chapter needs to be changed, as the 'like other girls' line is a bit clunky. I'm kind of hoping that this is another instance where the majority of the writing staff being ESL affected how the script sounds to a native English speaker and that the French version of this scene flows a little better. Because the only other option is that this line references the [_BEYOND: Two_ _Souls_](https://beyondtwosouls.fandom.com/wiki/Beyond:_Two_Souls) chapter, _[Like Other Girls](https://beyondtwosouls.fandom.com/wiki/Like_Other_Girls),_ which can include an attempted gangrape scene - and I really, _really_ don't want that to be the case here.

Therefore, the script will be changed to:

> **Alice:** Why didn't he ever love me? Why was he always so upset with me? I did everything he wanted. Maybe I wasn't good enough? Maybe that's why he was always so angry with me? I just wanted us to be a family. I wanted him to love me. Why couldn't we just be happy?

At this moment, Alice implies that she believes that Todd's rage was a result of her inability to 'do what he wanted.' Much like some abuse victims, she thinks that had she been able to do her job as a child android properly, Todd wouldn't have been violent toward her, and therefore, everything that happened was her fault. This parallels Alice with the deviant from _The Interrogation_ , who says something similar about Carlos Ortiz. At the same time, it also sets up some of the reasoning behind why Alice doesn't reveal her android status to Kara right from the beginning. Not only does Alice irrationally fear that Kara will reject her if the truth comes to light, but she also hates herself for 'failing' to accomplish her purpose in life.

Throughout the story, the Alice Relationship Scale exists to show whether Kara is dissuading those beliefs or enforcing them.

And finally, we need to make one small change to the touching 'Promise me' scene that the end of the chapter. I think that it should only be available if the Alice Relationship Scale reads as WARM or higher, thus giving consequence to a NEUTRAL or DISTANT ranking. At the same time, I believe that the option to sleep next to Alice in the Motel and Squat Branches should be unlockable based on a WARM or higher Scale rating, again enforcing that Kara isn't always close to Alice at this point. By establishing this early on, we can build up this DISTANT relationship so that the _Kara Alone_ version of _Battle for Detroit_ isn't something that comes out of nowhere. 


	12. Phase 1-11: From the Dead

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _From the Dead_ is the eleventh chapter of _Detroit: Become Human_. This chapter has only one outcome.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Date:** November 6th, 2038  
>  **Time:** 03:34 AM  
>  **Player:** Markus  
>  **Location:** Solid Waste Landfill.
> 
> A severely injured Markus awakens in a graveyard and must repair himself with the bodies of his fellow corpses.

_ From the Dead _ was created to shock the first-time player with the reveal that Markus is still alive following the events of  _ Broken _ and show the lengths that he is willing to go to continue to survive. And while a lot of  _ From the Dead’s _ impact is lost on a replay, the fact is that it serves its purpose well and, for that reason, doesn’t really need to be changed.

The only thing that I would want to do with  _ From the Dead _ is to find a way to connect it to the rest of the story somehow. This is Markus’s crucible, something that takes the person he was before and forges him into the iron-willed Leader that can bring the world to its knees over the course of a week and a half. And yet, the only mention that  _ From the Dead _ gets in future chapters is a very brief mention of Markus’s eye being a ‘spare part’ in  _ Public Enemy. _

Basically, the only real change to this chapter is that we will be exploring its implications to Markus’s character down the road, specifically focusing on the choices that he has to make to escape what is essentially an android mass grave.


	13. Phase 1-12: Waiting for Hank...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Waiting for Hank..._ is the twelth chapter of _Detroit: Become Human_. While this chapter originally had two different outcomes, _The Jigsaw Edit_ will see that count reduced to one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Date:** November 6th, 2038  
>  **Time:** 09:56 AM  
>  **Player:** Connor  
>  **Location:** Zen Garden, Detroit Police Department Central Station
> 
> Connor receives new orders from his mysterious handled before returning to the DPD to await Lieutenant Anderson's arrival.
> 
> (CW: brief mention of police brutality)

_Waiting for Hank..._ is a subtly interesting chapter that has Connor's two primary relationships going head-to-head in a battle for his soul. On the one hand, we have Hank: who represented everything that Connor can learn about himself during his Deviant Path. And on the other, we have Connor's true master, who wants nothing more than for him to be another unfeeling cog in the machine of their empire.

CyberLife.

Note that I don't actually say Amanda here. Because the version of Amanda that we see in the Zen Garden is still more than a program that's been appropriated by CyberLife to act as their mouthpiece directly into Connor's ear. And while there's certainly something hinted to be going on with Amanda Stern, we never actually get an explanation as to what that is.

While it would be quite easy to say that this is yet another instance of David Cage writing in a question that he has no answer for, I don't actually think that that's the case here. And while I'm probably going to go into it in a lot more detail later on, what I believe is happening here is that we are seeing the Fourth POV's remnants that were cut from the script.

If you've talked to me at all about some of the deep lore surrounding DBH, you'll probably know that I think that Chloe was originally going to get a POV. I've talked about the reasoning behind why I think that's the case in [a recent Tumblr post](https://konami-code-ao3.tumblr.com/post/632434340666671104/reduce-reuse-recycle-how-david-cage-turned), but the gist of it is that Chloe could have been used to explore the mysterious Kamski backstory that is touched on during DBH. One of those elements might have been what happened to Amanda Stern and why the Zen Garden's interface looks exactly like her.

I'm also a firm believer that the Chloe POV was cut a lot later than most people realize, as a lot of the questions that the backstory might have answered are still littered throughout the script. Not only that, certain animations involving Kamski had already [been in development by the time of shooting](https://www.reddit.com/r/DetroitBecomeHuman/comments/copigw/a_simple_video_about_the_animation_of_dbh_near/), hinting at him having a much larger role in the greater narrative. Given how close Quantic Dream might have been to bringing in the Chloe POV actors, there might not have been a lot of time to rework the script to accommodate the missing backstory.

This leads us back to the point of this conversation: what does all of this mean for Amanda? Because the fact is that all of our answers about the whos and whys behind her character were left on the cutting room floor when the decision was made to remove the Chloe POV. So the question arises as to whether or not she should be removed from _The Jigsaw Edit_ and replaced with another person.

I waffled around on this for a while, trying to figure out who could step into the role of Amanda. Chloe was my first instinct. I even had this cool little idea of incorporating the Chloe in the main menu into the whole thing by having her exist within the Zen Garden and heavily imply that she was the same person that Connor talks to. Her 'deviation' scene at the end of the game could be a form of redemption brought on by watching the POVs struggles and attempting to feel empathy for them. But something about all of that felt... _off_ in a way that I couldn't understand.

I briefly tossed around the idea that Connor would talk to himself or even reworking _Meet Kamski_ to give Kamski the role. I even considered scrapping the Zen Garden scenes entirely because I kept feeling really let down by the entire endeavour. Nothing that I could think of matched up with what Amanda gave us in terms of villainy, fear, and story continuity.

And then it hit me.

 _Yeah_. Nothing is ever going to replace Amanda.

[Simbi Khali](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Simbi_Khali) did such an incredible job portraying the not-so-human embodiment of CyberLife's uncompromising will that taking her out of the game would actually do it a disserve. Which is why I'm going to take the hit and keep her in _The Jigsaw Edit_ regardless of the mountain of questions her existence creates. And I know that this might seem a bit hypocritical, especially considering how I often point fingers at Cage for leaving even the smallest of pothole open. But honestly, _Amanda is just really fucking cool,_ and that's my only reason for wanting to keep her.

So with that all over with, let's get into the actual alterations that I want to make in _Waiting for Hank..._

Zen Garden Section 

First of all, I would like for Amanda to reveal that [Connor is a military prototype](https://konami-code-ao3.tumblr.com/post/632435692821217280/detroit-become-human-analyze-why-are-rk-series) placed within the DPD right before exiting the Zen Garden. This will both establish that Connor's loyalties are with CyberLife and that they are both _actively lying_ about him being a detective model. Amanda's script will go like this:

> **Amanda:** More and more androids show signs of deviancy. There are millions in circulation. If they become unstable, the consequences for the company will be disastrous. The RK line are the most advanced military prototypes CyberLife has ever created. Now that we've implanted you within the deviancy investigation, we expect you to find out what's really going on.

Doing this will sew doubt into the player's mind regarding Connor and CyberLife's trustworthiness, as the company is clearly more worried about their own reputation than they are about the safety of other people. It will also explain how Connor can carry, wield, and fire a gun, while other non-deviant androids (including the [police auxiliaries](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/PC200_and_PM700) seen in the game) are unable to do the same.

This change will also explain why Markus is a capable fighter. While it won't be revealed that Markus is an RK200 until much later, it sets up many dialogue changes and reveals that will occur in _Meet Kamski_.

Before we move onto the second part of this scene, I also need to reveal that the magic stone has been removed from the Zen Garden. However, it has the potential to be added back in as Connor's software destabilizes, giving him an out should he need to use it at the end of his story.

Central Station Section

Right off the bat, Connor will be hit with the next big change: Chris Miller. Once he finds Hank's desk, Connor will ask Chris about what time Hank usually arrives rather than the one-time character of Officer Wilson. Their dialogue will go as such:

> **Connor:** Excuse me? Do you know what time Lieutenant Anderson usually arrives?  
>  **Chris:** Depends on where he was the night before... If we're lucky, we'll see him before noon...

Then, depending on the events of _The Interrogation_ , their conversation will continue as follows:

> [ Connor didn't die during _The Interrogation_ ]  
>  **Chris:** I heard from Tina how things went last night with that deviant. But I thought your assignment was order...  
>  **Connor:** It's just been extended.  
>  **Chris:** Hank's gonna be overjoyed to hear that... I had my own run in with a deviant last night too... Really rough case.

  *     * [ 🔓 Connor successfully intervened during _The Interrogation_ ]  
 **Chris:** But yours has been quiet in its cell all night. It's scheduled for transfer later today.



> [ Connor died during _The Interrogation_ ]  
>  **Chris:** I heard from Tina how things went last night with that deviant. Have you already been repaired?  
>  **Connor:** Unfortunately, my predecessor was too damaged to be repaired. I’m the new Connor.  
>  ** **Chris:**** They don’t waste any time over at CyberLife, do they? I don’t think Hank’s gonna be overjoyed to see you… I had my own run in with a deviant last night too… Really rough case.
> 
> [ Connor didn't discover the deviant in _Partners_ ]  
>  **Chris:** I heard from Tina that CyberLife’s loaned you to the DPD to help investigate deviants. I had my own run in with a deviant last night too… Really rough case.

This change has been made to both help identify Chris as the cop that shoots Markus in _Broken_ but also to help establish him as a character that the player will recognize before we hit _The Jigsaw Edit's_ version of _Capital Park._ I've often seen that streamers don't even recognize Chris as the person Markus shoots until Hank points it out in _Meet Kamski._ Therefore, by directly stating that it was Chris, there is a greater chance that everyone will know who he is when we finally reach the climax of Chris's subplot.

The next major change will be the conversation that takes place between Connor and Ortiz's android. While the first half of the conversation remains the same, the second part is a bit different.

Due to the removal of the rA9 subplot, both the STATUETTE and RA9 dialogue options no longer exist. In their place, an unlockable option to talk about the map book occurs:

> Connor: This place that you were planning to go... Tell me more about it...

Connor also gets some new dialogue for the SECRET option:

> **Connor:** What you said yesterday... To find you when I was ready to learn the truth... What did you mean?  
>  **Deviant:** You'll know... You'll know what you're ready...

Finally, when the deviant decides to commit suicide, he does not destroy his head. Instead, he removes and crushes his own Thirium Pump Regulator and dies in his cell. This will allow Connor to reactivate him during Last Chance, Connor temporarily _._

Next, if Connor decides to enter the break room, he will be confronted by both Tina and Gavin, who will split an alteration of Gavin's canonical dialogue between them:

> [ Connor died in _The Interrogation_ ]  
>  **Tina:** Shit… Look at that… A fucking ghost…  
>  **Gavin:** One clone ends up in a dumpster, but this morning, what do you know?! Another son of a bitch takes its place…
> 
> [ Connor didn't die in _The Interrogation_ ]  
>  **Tina:** Fuck, look at that.  
>  **Gavin:** Our friend the plastic detective is back in town! Congratulations on last night, very impressive!

  *     * [ 🔓 Connor didn't get a confession in _The Interrogation_ ]  
Gavin: Could've got something outta that android if you hadn't gotten in my way... Told you we should have roughed it up or something...



> [ Connor didn't find the deviant in _Partners_ ]  
>  **Tina:** Look at that! It’s Hank’s new partner!  
>  ** **Gavin:**** Fucking plastic detective! Hey! You gonna be his drinking buddy, or something? Fowler can’t trust him to find his car after he stumbles out of bars now?

These changes were made to build upon what we've already established with Gavin's character in _The Interrogation._ Like we mentioned before, given the new context of his character, his words here will be framed as an almost cruel mocking - especially in the case of Connor’s previous death. I’ve also changed how Gavin refers to Connor, changing his pronouns from ‘he/him’ to ‘it’ to continue with Gavin’s dehumanization of androids.

This all culminates with the eventual ‘fight scene’ that occurs at the end of the chapter. Personally, I’d like it if Connor doesn’t fall to his knees after getting punched, mostly to back up the whole ‘advanced military prototype’ thing that Amanda reveals at the start of the chapter. Not only does this allow for a little bit of comedy to be injected into this part of the story, but it can also start to set up the adversarial relationship that Connor and Gavin will have over the course of the game.

The next little bits will be minor changes made to have _Waiting for Hank…_ fall in line with a lot of the big overall alterations in _The Jigsaw Edit_ . For example, as the Public Opinion Gameplay Stat no longer exists, the canonical down-tick in support that occurs if Connor doesn’t find Carlos’ android in _Partners_ no longer exists. In the same vein of thinking, since Kara cannot die in _Stormy Night_ , all dialogue and options about her death are no longer available.

After that, I’d like it if Simon and Josh’s profiles can be seen alongside Kara, North, and Markus’s when Connor reads through the DPD’s case files. This is because there will be an option to explore their backgrounds should specific requirements be met. Due to the changes made in _Broken_ , Markus’s profile will need to be changed to reflect Carl’s and/or Leo’s deaths.

In a moment of ominous foreshadowing, I want to replace the KNC new report about the book published by artificial intelligence to instead focus on [ CyberLife’s push to start ‘electing’ androids into governmental positions ](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/An_Android_for_President%3F) . Specifically, I’d want the news anchor to ask the question of ‘Will there be an android President in the future?’ and imply that the current President, Cristina Warren, is highly connected to CyberLife. 

But the biggest change that will occur in _The Jigsaw Edit’_ s version of _Waiting for Hank…_ is the reveal that Rose Chapman used to be the old Sergeant at the DPD. While this will be expanded on more during _Midnight Train_ , Hank will refer to the empty desk across from him as ‘Chapman’s,’ and there will be a Sgt. Chapman nameplate still on the desk. This will set up some of the events that happen later on in Kara's POV that specifically involve Rose.


	14. Phase 1-13: On the Run

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _On the Run_ is the thirteen chapter of _Detroit: Become Human_. While this chapter's playability was originally optional, _On the Run_ will now always be a part of the gameplay. Also, it's original seven outcomes will be reduced to six.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Date:** November 6th, 2038  
>  **Time:** 10:25 PM  
>  **Player:** Kara, Connor (optional)  
>  **Location:** Camden Detroit - 24 Convenience Store, Eastern Motel, Abandoned House, Abandoned Parking Lot
> 
> Kara and Alice awaken to face a new threat - the arrival of the infamous Deviant Hunter.

Oh boy. Strap yourself in because this one is gonna be _long_.

 _On the Run_ is amazing - not just in terms of storytelling but also when it comes to its gameplay dynamics that show just what Quantic Dream is capable of creating. I mean, depending on the player’s actions in _Fugitives_ , we can get three different beginnings to this chapter. That also means that Kara has three different scenarios to deal with _before_ going onto the streets. And then, she has to either get around the game's main antagonist or go right through him - and frankly, that’s fucking badass!

What I think I’m trying to say is that _On the Run_ is going to be used as an example later on when I have to discuss future chapters that have multiple versions of each other because this chapter is proof that Quantic Dream can pull it off without disrupting the story’s flow, meaning that they can do the same down the road.

Due to the complexity of this chapter, I will be breaking it up into five different sections. The first three will focus on each of the locations that Kara and Alice can awaken in, while the other two deal with how they go about escaping the police. The only constant change that will take place in every ‘timeline’ will be the removal of the _Cyber-Wildlife_ magazine article. This is because the few android animals that we see in the game don’t really have that much impact on the story. Instead, this article will be replaced with one titled _Deviant Hunter_ , allowing Kara to understand who and what she's going up against.

The Parking Lot 

Let's start with the easy one.

Since Kara is no longer heading toward Zlatko, she did not come into contact with the android which gives her his address in _Fugitives_. However, Kara does need someone to point her toward someone who can genuinely help her - so we’re going to be sending her and Alice directly to Rose’s farm.

In this branch, she will get this information from the burnt android that is hidden behind the garbage cans at the back of the parking lot. In a scene that mimics how Philias gives Markus the location to Jericho in _From the Dead_ , this android will use their last bit of life to pass on Rose’s address to Kara. The chapter will then continue as it does in canon, resulting in them entering the _Kara and Alice in the Street_ branch found below.

The Motel 

Right off the bat, let’s take care of all the problems resulting from Kara’s not going to Zlatko. Firstly, the dialogue option for CONTACT ANDROID will no longer be available in Kara’s conversation with Alice. Therefore, Kara does not have a place to go. She’ll try to leave the room to find Alice some food… but then is pushed back inside by the receptionist from _Fugitives_ :

> **Receptionist:** Get back inside! The police are out there looking for you!  
>  **Kara:** What? What do you mean?  
>  **Receptionist:** I recognized you two the moment you walked in. If I can do that, the police can too. If they see you, you’re both dead!

There are a couple of reasons for this change. Like with the Parking Lot branch, Kara needs somewhere to go, and it can’t be Zlatko. Sending her to Rose means that Kara can get involved in Uprising early on. And two, this game has a literal network of human sympathizers that helps to smuggle androids across the border and _doesn’t capitalize on it!_ Since we’ve already introduced Rose, we need to start laying the groundwork for this network throughout the story early on. Therefore, the receptionist is now part of the same group that Rose belongs to.

Then, we move to a completely new cut scene where the police investigate the convenience store. The conversation goes as such:

> **Hank:** [talking to the bus driver that reported Kara] Alright, that’s all for now. Free to go.  
>  **Ben:** We’ve got officers sweeping the neighborhood, in case anybody saw anything.  
>  **Hank:** Okay. Well, let me know if they turn anything up.  
>  **Ben:** What are you gonna do with that? [indicates toward Connor]  
>  **Hank:** I’ve no idea…
> 
> [cuts to Connor and Hank’s conversation by the car]  
>  **Hank:** So, what do we got here? Bus driver saw it at 2:30, seen robbing the convenience store…  
>  **Connor:** It stole clothing from the laundromat across the street.  
>  **Hank:** Clothes? The fuck you talkin’ about?  
>  **Connor:** I checked the CCTV while you were questioning the clerk. The android was caught on camera stealing them from the laundromat. It had money and clothes, and it was looking for a place to hide.  
>  **Hank:** So, what’s your conclusion, Sherlock?  
>  **Connor:** Maybe it didn’t go far…  
> [camera pans to the motel]

This scene was added to complement the other two versions of this scene that we see in the Parking Lot and Squat Branches' canonical iterations. By adding this scene in, we can see that Kara’s various actions in _Fugitives_ are what allowed Connor to track her down, as opposed to having the police show up at the motel.

Speak of the motel: the scene will then cut back to Kara and Alice in the motel room, where the following dialogue is dependant on the events of _Stormy Night_ :

> [ Todd was killed in _Stormy Night_ ]
> 
>   * [ Kara shot Todd ]  
>  **Alice:** You had no choice... He would have killed us if you hadn't stopped him... Why can't they see that?
>   * [ Alice shot Todd ]  
>  **Alice:** I didn't wanna hurt him, but he was gonna kill us... Why can't they see that?
> 

> 
> [ Todd is alive ]  
>  **Alice:** It's not true! He was the one who tried to kill us... Why can't they see that?

Kara asks the receptionist for help:

> **Kara:** We need to leave. Can you help us?  
>  **Receptionist:** If the police weren't swarming the neighborhood, maybe... But now, it's far too late.

Then, Kara gets a series of dialogue options:

> WORRIED  
>  **Kara:** If we don’t leave now, the humans will find us. Please, you’ve got to help us.
> 
> EXPLAIN  
>  **Kara:** Alice and I need to leave. I’m sorry, but we have to go now.
> 
> HUNTER [ 🔓 If Kara reads _Deviant Hunter_ ]  
>  **Kara:** There’s a deviant hunter working with the police. If he comes here, we’re all going to be caught.

But none of the choices matter, as the receptionist always says:

> **Receptionist:** I know, I know... But the cops are too close. If you leave now, you'll be killed for sure!

All of this leads to Kara doing something that we've only ever seen Connor do before: she chooses an approach to get the receptionist to get him to give her what she wants.

The script goes as such:

> THREATEN [ 🔓 Available if Kara has a gun ]  
>  **Kara:** [pulls out the gun] I’m sorry. But I really need you to tell us what you know.  
>  **Receptionist:** Hey! What the hell are you thinking?  
>  **Kara:** Tell me, or I swear I’ll shoot!  
>  **Alice:** Kara! What are you doing?  
>  **Kara:** It’s the only way, Alice!  
>  **Alice:** No, it’s not! Kara, please stop!  
>  **Kara:** [to the receptionist] Tell me what you know!  
>  **Receptionist:** Holy shit, please don’t kill me!  
>  **Kara:** Now!  
>  **Alice:** Stop it! Stop!
> 
>   * [ If Kara killed Todd ]  
>  **Kara:** I've killed before! I'm not afraid to do it again!
>   * [ If Alice killed Todd ]  
>  **Kara:** It's the only way forward, Alice! I thought you'd understand!
> 

> 
> **Receptionist:** Stop please! I'll tell you! I'll tell you!
> 
> CONVINCE  
>  **Kara:** Please, she’s just a little girl! Do you have children? A daughter?  
>  **Receptionist:** I’ve got a girl of my own… She turned fourteen last week.  
>  **Kara:** Then you have to understand.  
>  **Receptionist:** Maybe. But I can’t perform miracles.
> 
>   * SYMPATHIZE  
> [ Todd is alive ]  
>  **Kara:** You have to understand. Alice's father attacked us. We were only defending ourselves. I know that you're scared, but it'll be worse if the humans catch us.  
>   
> [ Todd was killed in _Stormy Night_ ]  
>   
> 
>     * [ Kara killed Todd ]  
>  **Kara:** You have to undertand. I had to kill Alice's father when he tried to hurt us. I know that you're scared, but it'll be worse if the humans catch us.  
>   
> 
>     * [ Alice killed Todd ]  
>  **Kara:** You have to understand. Alice saved me from her father when he tried to hurt us. I know that you're scared, but it'll be worse if the humans catch us.  
>   
> 
>   * **Kara:** You said that you have a little girl... A true father would do anything to protect his daughter.  
>  **Receptionist:** If that man really did that to her... I'm so sorry that happened. Yes, yes, I'll see what I can do.
>   * ANTAGONIZE  
>  **Kara:** You came in here to protect yourself from the police - not us! You're just as bad as the other humans!  
>  **Receptionist:** No! No! I was just trying to help!  
>  **Kara:** You're just like them! You're a liar!  
>   
> [ Todd was killed in _Stormy Night_ ]  
>   
> 
>     * [ Kara killed Todd ]  
>  **Receptionist:** And what about you, huh? You killed a man! They'll lock me up if they knew I helped you!  
>   
> 
>     * [ Alice killed Todd ]  
>  **Receptionist:** And what about you, huh? You convinced this kid to kill her dad! They'll lock me up if they knew i helped you!  
>   
> 
>   * [Kara grabs the scissors that she used to cut her hair\\]  
>  **Receptionist:** Hey! What the hell are you thinking?  
>  **Kara:** Tell me, or I swear I'll use this!  
>  **Alice:** Kara! What are you doing?  
>  **Kara:** It's the only way, Alice!  
>  **Alice:** No, it's not! Kara, please stop!  
>  **Kara:** Tell me what you know!  
>  **Receptionist:** Holy shit, please don't kill me!  
>  **Kara:** Now!  
>  **Alice:** Stop it! Stop!  
>   
> 
>     * [ Kara killed Todd ]  
>  **Kara:** I've killed before! I'm not afraid to do it again!  
>   
> 
>     * [ Alice killed Todd ]  
>  **Kara:** It's the only way forward, Alice! I thought you'd understand!  
>   
> 
>   * **Receptionist:** Stop please! I'll tell you! I'll tell you!
> 


Regardless of what option the player chooses, the receptionist will always give Kara the address of a friend who helps deviants:

> **Receptionist:** I’ve got a friend that lives just north of here. Here’s her address. She does her best to help deviants like you.  
>  ****Kara:** Thank you. **

His reaction to Kara thanking him is wildly different depending on whether or not she sympathized with him:

> [ Kara threatened or antagonized the receptionist ] **  
> ****Receptionist:** Not that you’ll make it that far, with the police closing in. You’re just like what they say on the news.
> 
> [ Kara sympathized with the receptionist ]  
>  ******Receptionist:** ** ** I hope that you make it. You both deserve the best. **  
> **

I'm going to discuss the reasoning behind the changes to this scene in the Squat Branch. So if you want to skip ahead, you can do so now.

The scene shifts again to the motel's parking lot. Hank approaches the receptionist, who is on his way back to his office.

> **Hank:** Lieutenant Anderson, Detroit Police. We’re looking for a female android, robbed a store down the road last night. You see anything?

Depending on Kara's actions upstairs, he will react one of two ways:

> [ Kara threatened or antagonized the receptionist ]  
>  **Receptionist:** Yeah… She’s probably still here. Room 28.  
>  **Hank:** Thank you. [Turns to Ben] Ben? ...Yeah, it’s still at the motel. Send some uniforms and cordon off the area. I’m heading to its room now.
> 
> [ Kara sympathized with the receptionist ]  
>  **Receptionist:** An android? No… I don’t take androids here.  
>  **Connor:** [Holds up palm projector to show Kara’s profile] Have you seen anyone that looks like this?  
>  **Receptionist:** Sorry… It’s been quiet all night. [Exits]  
>  **Hank:** It didn’t come this way.  
>  **Connor:** It wouldn’t hurt to check the place out. The deviant did wear a disguise afterall. Maybe he didn’t recognize it out of uniform.  
>  **Hank:** Sure, fine… Ben? Send some uniforms and cordon off the area. I’m heading upstairs now.

The scene will then continue as it does in canon, with Hank and Connor entering Kara’s motel room while she and Alice escape into the streets.

The Squat 

As we started to discuss in this branch of _Fugitives_ , we need to start by removing many of the ‘Unstable Mentally Ill Person’ tropes that surround Ralph while also keeping him true to his character. For that reason, shortly after changing her appearance, Kara _must_ discover the body in the bathtub before immediately being grabbed by Ralph. He reveals that the police are outside and looking for Kara.

The scene cuts to Connor and Hank outside the convenience store. As Kara now has to steal the wire cutters to get into the Squat, the canonical dialogue used in this instance will always take place.

The scene cuts back to the Squat, with Kara, Ralph, and Alice sitting around the dining room table downstairs. Much like with the Motel Branch, Kara and Alice speak about the lies that have been spread about them after the events of _Stormy Night_ :

> [ Todd was killed in _Stormy Night_ ]
> 
>   * [ Kara shot Todd ]  
>  **Alice:** You had no choice... He would have killed us if you hadn't stopped him... Why can't they see that?  
>   
> 
>   * [ Alice shot Todd ]  
>  **Alice:** I didn't wanna hurt him, but he was gonna kill us... Why can't they see that?
> 

> 
> [ Todd is alive ]  
>  **Alice:** It's not true! He was the one who tried to kill us... Why can't they see that?

Kara asks Ralph to help them, but Ralph responds:

> **Ralph:** Ralph knows a place… But Ralph is so alone, he doesn’t want Kara and the little girl to leave.

Then, Kara will get a series of dialogue options:

> WORRIED  
>  **Kara:** If we don’t leave now, the humans will find us. Please, you’ve got to help us.
> 
> EXPLAIN  
>  **Kara:** Alice and I need to leave. I’m sorry, but we have to go.
> 
> HUNTER [ 🔓 If Kara reads _Deviant Hunter_ ]  
>  **Kara:** There’s a deviant hunter working with the police. If he comes here, we’re all going to be caught.

But none of them matter, as Ralph says:

> **Ralph:** Ralph knows, he really does… But he doesn’t want to be alone again. We can be a family! It’ll be great, you’ll see. Father, mother, little girl.

Then, like with the receptionist, Kara can choose an approach:

> THREATEN [ 🔓 Available if Kara has a gun ]  
>  **Kara:** I’m sorry, Ralph. But I really need you to tell us what you know.  
>  **Ralph:** No! No, don’t hurt Ralph!  
>  **Kara:** Tell me, or I swear I’ll blow your head off!  
>  **Alice:** Kara! What are you doing?  
>  **Kara:** It’s the only way, Alice!  
>  **Alice:** No, it’s not! Kara, please stop!  
>  **Kara:** Tell me what you know, Ralph!  
>  **Ralph:** Please, please stop!  
>  **Kara:** Now, Ralph!  
>  **Alice:** Stop it! Stop!
> 
>   * [ Kara killed Todd ]  
>  **Kara:** I've killed before! I'm not afraid to do it again!  
>   
> 
>   * [ Alice killed Todd ]  
>  **Kara:** It's the only way forward, Alice! I though you'd understand!
> 

> 
> **Ralph:** Stop please! Ralph will tell you!
> 
> CONVINCE  
>  **Kara:** I saw the body upstairs. You killed that human, didn’t you?  
>  **Ralph:** No… No, he was like that when Ralph found him…
> 
>   * SYMPATHIZE  
> [ Todd is Alive ]  
>  **Kara:** We understand, Ralph. Alice and I had to fight to escape her father after he tried to kill us. I know that you're scared, but it'll be worse if the humans catch us.  
>   
> 
>   * [ Todd was killed in _Stormy Night_ ]  
>   
> 
>     * [ Kara killed Todd ]  
>  **Kara:** I understand, Ralph. I had to kill my master when he tried to hurt us. I know that you're scared, but it'll be worse if the humans catch us.  
>   
> 
>     * [ Alice killed Todd ]  
>  **Kara:** I understand, Ralph. Alice saved me from my master when he tried to hurt us. I know that you're scared, but it'll be worse if the humans catch us.  
>   
> 
>   * **Kara:** You said you wanted to be like a family, Ralph... Father, mother, little girl, remember? A father would do anything to protect his daughter.  
>  **Ralph:** Ralph didn't mean any harm... He is just so scared because he can't leave this house, not after what the humans did to him. [points at his scars] Ralph is sorry... He just wants to be your friend.  
>  **Kara:** Then help us.  
>   
> 
>   * ANTAGONIZE  
>  **Kara:** You killed that man, Ralph. There's no point in lying. You hate humans, but you're just like them. You're a murderer!  
>   
> 
>     * [ Todd was killed in _Stormy Night_ ]  
>  **  
> **
>       * [ Kara killed Todd ]  
>  **Ralph:** You've killed a human too, Kara! If Ralph is a murderer, then so are you!  
>   
> 
>       * [ Alice killed Todd ]  
>  **Ralph:** The little girl killed a human for you, Kara! He thought that you'd understand!  
>   
> 
>     * [ Todd is Alive ]  
>  **Ralph:** You've attacked humans too, Kara! If Ralph is dangerous, then so are you!  
>   
> 
>   * [Kara grabs a kitchen knife}  
>  **Ralph:** No! No, don't hurt Ralph!  
>  **Alice:** Kara! What are you doing?  
>  **Kara:** It's the only way, Alice!  
>  **Alice:** No, it's not! Kara, please stop!  
>  **Kara:** Tell me what you know, Ralph!  
>  **Ralph:** Please, please stop!  
>  **Kara:** Now, Ralph!  
>  **Alice:** Stop it! Stop!  
>   
> 
>     * [ Todd is Alive ]  
>  **Kara:** He's just like your father, Alice! I thought you'd understand!  
>   
> 
>     * [ Todd was killed in _Stormy Night_ ]  
>   
> 
>       * [ Kara shot Todd ]  
>  **Kara:** I've kille before! I'm not afraid to do it again!  
>   
> 
>       * [ Alice shot Todd ]  
>  **Kara:** It's the only way forward, Alice! I thought you'd understand!  
>   
> 
>   * **Ralph:** Stop, please! Ralph will tell you!
> 


Again, like the receptionist, Ralph gives Kara the address, and she thanks him for it. Ralph’s reaction will depend on how she decided to get him to pony up the information:

> [ Kara threatened or antagonized Ralph ]  
>  **Ralph:** You’re lucky enough to escape this place. Ralph envies you for that. Ralph hates you for that.
> 
> [ Kara sympathized with Ralph ]  
>  **Ralph:** Ralph wants to go with you… But he can’t. He hopes that he’ll see you all again one day, when things are better.

The reason for this change (as well as the similar one that takes place in the Motel Branch) is that I want to address Kara's issue of not having a Path mechanic to follow within her canon storyline. And while that should not in any way take away from [ the massive internal journey that Kara undergoes throughout DBH ](https://youtu.be/8136CxSh5Ps?t=83) , I still think that it’s important to address that there is no version of the Machine or Pacifist Path within her POV. Sure, you can play Kara as DISTANT to Alice, but that never really goes anywhere because her story cuts off after the decision to abandon her found family in _Crossroads_.

What I want to do with _The Jigsaw Edit’s_ versions of Kara’s Paths is to parallel them directly to Connor’s Machine and Deviant Paths. However, by having her be deviant the entire time, this will show that deviancy is just one step in an android’s journey toward self-actualization and not the end-all-be-all decision that makes you a good person. At the same time, it will also allow us to deconstruct a popular trope surrounding female characters within the action genre.

If you’ve got about an hour and don’t mind some spoilers for Mad Max: Fury Road, I really recommend watching [ Innuendo Studio’s ](https://www.youtube.com/c/InnuendoStudios) video essay series called [ Bringing Back What’s Stolen ](https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLJA_jUddXvY7EjlefWLnxCzLbBHU4Dz6R). It breaks down the various ways that women are presented in action movies, exploring why filmmakers and audience members often fall back on those tropes, and then talks about how Fury Road goes about blowing them out of the water. I often think about this essay series when talking about Kara because it really helps me understand why Cage made many choices he did when creating her character.

Why didn’t Kara get a romance? [ Because Kara is a mother and we don’t like to think about our parents having sex ](https://youtu.be/MQNkQ2CPikg?t=170) . Why is Kara’s violence mostly framed within the context of protecting Alice and not herself? [ Because that’s what we’d want our mothers to do if they were our last line of defence ](https://youtu.be/MQNkQ2CPikg?t=23) . Why does Kara’s story bounce from one abusive narrative to the next? (tw: sexual assault and violence) [ Because while male audience members have a difficult time relating to female characters, one can usually empathize with someone going through hell ](https://youtu.be/KGlZGFpGnRU?t=20).

But the [ Motherhood ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MQNkQ2CPikg&list=PLJA_jUddXvY7EjlefWLnxCzLbBHU4Dz6R&index=5) video asks a question that I think is quite relevant to this particular conversation:

> “What warm-blooded mammal can look at the quivering lips of children in danger and not root for anyone trying to save them?”  
> \- Innuendo Studios, Bringing Back What’s Stolen: Motherhood

Well, what if the player takes one look at Kara and thinks, “She could.”

Because as beautiful as Kara’s canonical internal journey is, it’s also very straight forward. Kara starts off in _A New Home_ expressing love without really feeling it, learns about how actually to embody this emotion throughout her story, and then finishes her POV off with some of the most stunning displays of love that I’ve ever seen in a game before. But since Kara’s story always ends with her being the same person, all the player gets to do with her character is keeping her alive long enough for her to undergo that development. This puts her POV at direct odds with Markus and Connor’s stories, where the player actively gets to choose who they want these characters to be - not just the physical location they end up in at the end of their narrative.

Which begs the question: does linear character development really have a place within the Choose-Your-Own-Story framework?

For this reason, we will be using _On the Run_ to introduce the two Paths that Kara can explore within _The Jigsaw Edit_ : the Mother Bear Path and the Lone Wolf Path. The Mother Bear Path will explore how Kara learns to care about those around her, learning to empathize with their plights and situations alongside her own. This Path will culminate with her endgame task during _Battle for Detroit_ , where she is either functioning as Jericho’s ally or its Leader who takes up Markus’s legacy in the wake of his death.

And then there is the Lone Wolf Path, who prioritizes her own personal wants and needs over everyone else’s. Much like Machine!Connor, Lone Wolf!Kara learns nothing from her journey with Alice and will go through whatever she must to extend her own existence. And sometimes, that will put her at direct odds with Alice in some really hard-hitting fashions.

We start to develop these Paths here in _On the Run_ , where Kara can not sympathize with Ralph and the receptionist and project her inability to do so upon Alice. In the timeline where Alice kills Todd, Lone Wolf!Kara believes that Alice will understand her decision to threaten the receptionist/Ralph because it's a means to an end. Of course, this is completely contradictory to the actual reasoning for why Alice chose to kill her former master: because she cared about Kara’s safety and didn’t want her to get hurt.

And much like Machine!Connor, Lone Wolf!Kara either doesn’t understand Alice’s choice or _actively chooses not to_.

For obvious reasons, should Kara choose to either antagonize or threaten the receptionist/Ralph, the Alice Relationship Scale will take a violent swing toward the DISTANT end. Conversely, should she choose to sympathize with them, it will make a big move toward the FAMILY end. This change is made mostly to build the Lone Wolf Path up and establish it as a viable way to play Kara’s POV. But it also adds some ways to make Alice dislike Kara to the game, as her canonical Relationship Stat is one of the easiest ones to maintain.

And now, back to the story at the Squat.

The scene cuts to just outside with Connor, who will enter the Squat as he does in canon. If Ralph was threatened or antagonized, he will immediately give up Kara’s location, leading to the chase scene in the streets. But if she was nice to him, Ralph will stay silent. Connor will search the house as he does in canon. But if he takes too long to find her, Hank will make him leave, and the chapter ends with _Kara & Alice Undiscovered in Squat. _

However, if Connor finds them hiding under the stairs, something very different from canon happens when Kara and Alice run out the back door.

Ralph tries to protect them from Connor. And Connor kills him for it.

This change is made to cement Connor’s role as _Detroit: Become Human’s_ villain early in the game. It also gives narrative payoff to Connor’s horrified reaction following his deviation while also making sure that all three characters have the potential to have blood on their hands by this point in the game.

In terms of a cross-chapter impact, Ralph’s body will appear during _Last Chance, Connor_ , but will be too damaged to revive. However, we will also not be seeing Ralph again should he survive _On the Run_ , as the _Kara Captured_ branch of _Battle for Detroit_ has been entirely reworked to the point of being almost unrecognizable.

Kara and Alice in the Street 

Should Kara and Alice enter the street without being discovered by Connor and the cops, Alice’s current relationship status will unlock a gameplay option. If it is WARM or higher, Alice will be cooperative as they move onto the streets. However, if Kara has either a NEUTRAL or DISTANT relationship with Alice, she will immediately start to cause a commotion and alert the police to their presence, beginning the chase scene.

This change was made to give consequences to the player following the Lone Wolf Path, similar to how playing the Machine or Violent Paths often makes playing the game more difficult. By giving weight to the player’s choices, we can establish Kara’s contrasting personalities depending on which Path the player is taking her down.

Connor Pursues Kara 

Since _The Jigsaw Edit_ has removed the grand majority of Kara’s deaths from her storyline, it is now impossible for her and Alice to die on the highway. As a result, the brief fight scene that takes place between Kara and Connor can only result in her shaking him off or pushing him into an oncoming car, which kills him. Should Connor chase Kara across the highway, this will unlock multiple potential dialogue options between them during the endgame of their stories.

Finally, we need to change the final scene between Kara and Alice after they successfully evade capture. First of all, it’s not going to occur at the train station, as Kara and Alice will still be travelling on foot when the next chapter opens up. Therefore, this scene's location will be replaced with a shot of them from behind, slowly disappearing into a crowd of humans.

However, if the Alice Relationship Scale is anywhere between FAMILY and WARM, there will be an unlockable scene where Kara briefly checks on Alice. It won’t result in a hug between them, which seems to be the default ending for most of Kara’s canon chapters. But does show that Kara is learning to care about the wellbeing of others. Not only will this establish a difference between Mother Bear!Kara and Lone Wolf!Kara, but it will also make their eventual hug feel a bit more earned than a regular event that occurs between these two characters right from the start of their journey.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Glossary list in the Introduction chapter has been updated with new information found within this chapter.


	15. Phase 1-14: Jericho

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Jericho_ is the fourteenth chapter of _Detroit: Become Human_. This chapter has only one outcome.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Date:** November 6th, 2038  
>  **Time:** 04:30 PM  
>  **Player:** Markus  
>  **Location:** Ferndale, Detroit - Ferndale Station, Jericho
> 
> After being given a mysterious message of hope from a dying android, Markus arrives at his destiny.

After the heart-pounding action of  _ On the Run _ ,  _ Jericho _ is a nice place to relax and cool down. And while we’ve got some work to do, it’s not going to be as extensive as the last chapter was.

Firstly, the symbol that Markus tracks via the graffiti needs to go, as it was historically used by the Underground Railroad to guide escaped slaves to safe houses. As we are forgoing David Cage’s shitty racism metaphor, we will not be using any appropriated imagery. Instead, Markus will track the graffiti itself, which will all be based on metaphorical images of androids.

In the same vein, the android compartments found in the train and the android-only staircase are also going to be removed. Not only are they pretty tasteless references to various Jim Crow laws, but they also don’t really make sense within the context of the story. I mean,  [ we’ve already seen a human not react to a pair of androids sitting outside one of these compartments ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qyu73W4vmd8) , so why the fuck do they need to exist in the first place?

Next, I’d really like it if the person who bumps into Markus after getting off the escalator was  [ the Lead Protestor from  _ Shades of Color _ ](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Android_Protest_Leader) . By making this change, we get a cool little throwback to Markus’s introductory chapter and get to see this man outside of his role as a minor antagonist in our POV’s story. Therefore, when the Lead Protestor and his group return later on in the story, we can then build on his character from this moment here instead of who he was to Markus in  _ Shades of Color _ .

After that, I think that Markus should interact with some of the homeless people that he meets on his journey to Jericho. This allows for an opportunity for us to work on that anti-capitalist theme that was established back in  _ Shades of Color _ while simultaneously paralleling Markus' journey in  _ Jericho _ to that of his introductory chapter where he didn’t talk to these people at all. At the same time, it will also allow for Markus to actually speak more, as he gets the least lines out of all the POV characters.

As a result, more dialogue options will be added to the script. Starting with the homeless man that is in Ferndale Station, we have:

> **Homeless Man:** Hey, mister, can you spare some change?  
>  **Markus:** ...I’m sorry. I don’t have any money.  
>  **Homeless Man:** Damn… CyberLife’s just keeps taking everything that we need to survive, don’t they? They don’t care about the people that get hurt along the way...

Then, we can have him talk to the woman sitting across the street in front of a bar:

> **Homeless Woman:** Please… [coughing] Please, can anyone help me?  
>  **Markus:** What’s wrong?  
>  **Homeless Woman:** [coughing] Please, do you have any money? I’m so sick, I just want to buy some medicine   
>  **Markus:** I’m sorry. But I don’t have anything to eat…  
>  **Homeless Woman:** I lost my job after my boss replaced me with an android. How am I supposed to get better if I can’t make money?

And finally, we can have Markus talk to the homeless man sitting right by the alley that he ducks into to find one of the graffiti clues.

> **Homeless Man:** Hey, buddy? You got any change?  
>  **Markus:** [shakes his head]  
>  **Homeless Man:** Damn… It’s getting late, and I haven’t got a safe place to stay for the night.

Then, their conversation will shift to something a bit more personal to Markus:

> **Homeless Man:** You hear about that artist, Carl Manfred?  
>  **Markus:** [stunned] ...No… What happened?
> 
>   * [ Carl died in _Broken_ ]  
>  **Homeless Man:** I heard his android killed him.  
>   
> 
>   * [ Leo died in _Broken_ ]  
>  **Homeless Man:** I heard his android killed his son.  
>   
> 
>   * [ Carl and Leo died in _Broken_ ]  
>  **Homless Man:** I heard his android killed him and his son.  
> 
> 

> 
> **Markus:** [uncomfortable] Wh… Where did you hear that?  
>  **Man:** I read it somewhere. Not much to do these days except read.

By transferring this script from a group of NCPs to someone that Markus actively has to talk to, we can see how  _ Broken’s _ no-win scenario is still affecting Markus on an emotional level. This will help develop his character while also connecting what he went through in  _ Broken _ to Markus’s eventual reasons for starting the Uprising.

Once Markus discovers Jericho, he has an option to cross the bridge and cause it to collapse. If he does this, it will trigger the jumpscare that happens in the hallway once he enters Jericho. This gives a consequence to the decision to cross the bridge, implying that someone ventured out of the cargo hold to discover the source of the noise.

However, the person performing the jumpscare isn’t North: it’s Lucy. Lucy is also the one who will relay Simon’s canonical “Welcome to Jericho” line. This is done to not play favourites amongst the three members of the Jericrew right off the bat while also building up Lucy’s character in time for her eventual death.


	16. Phase 1-15: The Nest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _The Nest_ is the fifteenth chapter of _Detroit: Become Human_. This chapter has four different outcomes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Date:** November 6th, 2038  
>  **Time:** 03:02 PM  
>  **Player:** Connor  
>  **Location** Chicken Feed, Abandoned Apartment, Urban Farms of Detroit
> 
> After having a heart-to-heart with Hank over lunch, Connor investigates an abandoned apartment in hopes of discovering the deviant that lives inside.

_ The Nest _ is a fun chapter, starting with an interesting conversation between Connor and Hank and ending with a lightning-fast rooftop chase scene. And while the final part of this chapter doesn’t need any alteration at all, I want to focus more on the moments of character building that take place in the first two-thirds of  _ The Nest _ .

Starting at Chicken Feed, the COMPANY dialogue option is now one of the most important things as we advance. Should the player chose this option, the following will be said:

> **Connor:** I don’t want to alarm you, Lieutenant, but I think your friends are engaged in illegal activities…  
>  **Hank:** Well, everybody does what they have to, to get by… As long as they’re not hurting anybody, I don’t bother ‘em.  
>  **Connor:** There’s a high probability that their actions will not benefit society at all.  
>  **Hank:** [shrugging] Statistically speaking, there’s always a chance for unlikely events to take place.

This dialogue will cause Connor’s software to destabilize slightly, as Hank’s philosophy of not punishing people for finding ‘non-desirable’ ways to exist within the capitalist meat grinder is basically  _ what the entire point of deviancy is _ . Just listening to Hank say this will unlock a potential dialogue choice in  _ Russian Roulette _ while also allowing Deviant!Connor to repeat Hank’s words to Markus in  _ Night of the Soul _ to show that he  _ learned  _ from this conversation.

Next, Rupert’s apartment is going to be slightly different from how it is in canon. For one, the strange hallway that they walk through after entering should be removed, as it is both a bizarre design choice and also serves no narrative purpose. The magazine will be placed on the kitchen counter, and Connor and Hank will walk directly into the living area after opening the door to a flock of escaping pigeons. There will also be no maze carvings on the walls, as there is no narrative payoff in the game for this.

As all references to rA9 have been removed, Connor is alerted to Rupert’s presence in the apartment by damage done to the bathroom sink, implying that Rupert broke it in fear after hearing them knock on the door.

And finally, if Connor investigates Rupert’s jacket, a new dialogue option has the potential to be unlocked:

> **Connor:** “R.T.”. Probably initials.  
>  **Hank:** He put his initials on his jacket? That’s something your mom does when you’re in first grade…  
>  **Connor:** Deviants have a habit of putting their names on things. It seems important to them.
> 
>   * [ **🔓** If Connor lied about Daniel ]  
>  **Hank:** You seem to know a lot about deviants for someone's who's ever dealth with them before...
> 


Should Connor be caught in a lie, the Hank Relationship Scale will tip toward the HOSTILE end of the spectrum. By doing this, we are connecting the events of _The Hostage_ into the main game, giving the chapter consequence outside of being a cold open.


	17. Phase 1-16: Spare Parts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Spare Parts_ is originally _Detroit: Become Human's_ nineteenth chapter. However, it will become _The Jigsaw Edit's_ sixteenth chapter. Also, instead of eliminating _Time to Decide_ entirely, it shall serve as an introductory scene for this new version of _Spare Parts_ , forming Markus's first multi-location chapter.
> 
> This chapter will have three different outcomes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Date:** November 6th, 2038  
>  **Time:** 05:13 PM  
>  **Player:** Markus  
>  **Location:** Jericho, CyberLife Warehouse and Docks
> 
> After discovering Jericho, Markus is confronted with the realities of how his people are living. Unable to stand still any longer while people are suffering, he decides to take action.

Yes, you read that right: _The Jigsaw Edit_ will see _Spare Parts_ being moved up and combined with _Time to Decide_. This change was done to end Markus’s version of Phase One with an action sequence and work to complement some of the bigger moves that are going to happen in Phase Two.

As a result of _Spare Parts_ going through some pretty heavy edits, I’m going to break it up into multiple sections similar to what I did in _On the Run_. Hopefully, this should make it a bit easier to understand. But if you have any questions, please don’t be afraid to ask.

 **Time to** **Decide**

Much of the script from Markus’s introduction to Jericho will remain the same, just with Lucy delivering the Jericrew’s original lines. As discussed in _Jericho_ , this change is being made to not play favourites with the Jericrew members during their introductory scene while also helping to develop Lucy’s character.

The script will go as such:

> **Markus:** What is this place?  
>  **Lucy:** A faven for those just like you. My name is Lucy.  
>  **Markus:** I don’t understand. This is Jericho?  
>  **Lucy:** It’s a refuge for those who don’t want to be slaves anymore. Here, we are free.

Then, Markus will get two chances to pick from the following dialogue options:

> TRAIL  
>  **Markus:** You knew that only an android could follow the trail, didn’t you?  
>  **Lucy:** Only those who are like us can find Jericho. If you could decipher the sighs I put out into the world, it is because one of us trusted you enough to give you the key.
> 
> ANDROID  
>  **Markus:** How many are you?  
>  **Lucy:** There are nineteen of us still in working order. The rest were damaged escaping their masters. Many try to reach Jericho. Few succeed.
> 
> REFUGE  
>  **Markus:** I don’t understand… I thought Jericho was a place where androids lived in freedom…  
>  **Lucy:** We do live in freedom. It may not be what you hoped for, but here there are no more threats, no more humiliation. Here, we are our own masters.

Lucy will then close out the conversation:

> **Lucy:** I understand how you feel, but we have more freedom here than we ever did outside these walls. You’re safe here. You can stay as long as you like.

After that, Markus will get the chance to explore Jericho and speak with the three Jericrew members. Unlike in canon, all of them will receive a single cutscene for their interactions, meaning that North will not get any special attention from the player. This is done not to create any early favouritism amongst the Jericrew while simultaneously getting a quick look into each of their characters.

This also means that it’s character analysis time, so let’s start with…

Josh and Simon 

First of all, let it be known that I will fight for Josh until the universe experiences its inevitable heat-death at the end of time. Because Josh is everything to me.

What I think Josh’s character needs the most is a bit of a redesign, both in terms of his actual portrayal within the game and his reasoning for being included within the Jericrew in the first place. Regarding the first point, while I understand why Josh might be a bit hesitant about Markus’s actions at the beginning of the game, _Freedom March_ sees him becoming the most aggressive, angriest pacifist I’ve ever seen portrayed in media before - and it’s amazing! However, by the time we get to _Crossroads_ , he starts saying that Jericho should have stayed quiet and let everything continue as it was because freedom isn't worth the cost. Given how willing Josh was just one chapter prior ready to die spitting in the faces of cops who wanted to gun him down and call it a day, this seems really out of character.

And then there’s Simon. I’ll be the first to admit that he’s not my favourite character. I’ve never liked how the fandom has copy and pasted most of Josh’s aspects onto him, transforming Simon into this shining example of softness to put him in direct contrast with North. Simon also never picks a fucking side, flip-flopping between one ideology or the other while also leading Markus toward the Failure Path. Just like Josh, I never seem to understand what it is that he actually wants Markus to do _because he never advocates for actual action_.

But at the same time, I don’t know if we can really say that something is out of character for Josh and Simon… because we never really get to see them _be_ anything other than mouthpieces for David Cage’s terrible interpretation of pacifism. And this is made even more evident when you realize that both his and Josh’s Relationship Stats are pretty much pointless.

I’m not trying to be harsh or anything, but just think about it for a second: what does ‘romancing’ Josh or Simon actually contribute to Markus’s POV? Because despite being the voices on Markus’s shoulder that advocate for the Pacifist Path (and yes, Simon does do this, though to a lesser degree than Josh), their Relationship Stats don’t do anything to determine its success - that’s the job of the Public Opinion Stat. Having a negative relationship with either of them doesn’t cause anything to happen, as the coding to trigger Markus’s Exile timeline depends on being HOSTILE with North. Sure, having Simon as a Companion gives you a convenient bullet shield should the player get Markus shot, but that only happens if you didn’t grab John in _Spare Parts_ or failed to get North’s Relationship Star high enough - making Simon the back-up plan for a back-up plan _twice_ . But on the other hand, Josh will literally contribute nothing to Markus’s POV _even if his Relationship Stat has been maxed out since Stratford Tower_. 

So I ask again: what is the point of the Josh and Simon Relationship Stats? And if that answer is ‘not all that much,’ then what is the point of them being a part of the Markus POV cast? And I think the answer has to do with the cut Lover!Simon arc.

[adjusts my tinfoil hat] Let me break it down for you.

It’s pretty much an open secret that Simon was going to be Markus’s second romantic option. And much like with my speculation regarding the Chloe POV, I believe that the Lover!Simon option was cut quite late in DBH’s development. The lack of time to rework the script is probably one reason why so many parallels between Simon and North still exist. The most evident example is [ the scene where they will both offer their hearts to Markus the Revolution ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-z2XmdXCHjo) in an undeniably romantic gesture. Their backstories are also shrouded in mystery, with North’s being revealed over the game's course, and Simon’s enigmatic past is hinted at in his [ Gallery Bio ](https://youtu.be/FjlU1MgYths?t=801) . Simon and North are the only two characters who have their facial models being seen on other androids throughout the game - both with Daniel in _The Hostage_ and the [ Other North ](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/BL100) in _Capital Park_ and [ a couple of NPC characters in _Markus’s Demonstration_ ](https://youtu.be/paiH4FcYemg?t=1031) . [ Simon also gets North’s lines in the version of _Night of the Soul - Markus_ where she’s dead ](https://detroitbecometext.github.io/chapters/31.1) , which Josh only ever gets his one cutscene and no dialogue options even if both of them are dead. Given all this evidence, it’s pretty clear that Simon was originally the alternative romantic interest that [ Cage revealed in his Reddit AMA ](https://www.reddit.com/r/DetroitBecomeHuman/comments/8t2p1k/hey_im_david_cage_writer_and_director_of_detroit/).

So why was this arc cut, and what does Josh have to do with it? Well, to be brutally honest, it’s because [ David Cage is a well documented racist and homophobe ](https://www.gamesindustry.biz/articles/2018-01-15-quantic-dream-denies-allegations-of-homophobia-racism-and-toxic-studio-culture) \- not that he’ll ever admit to it either to the media or even to himself.

I think that when the Lover!Simon arc was still a thing, Cage was probably wrestling with the fact that he was not only going to have a queer man of colour as the protagonist of his game but also going to have an interracial gay romance at the heart of the Path that DBH pushes as the way to win the game. So to ‘no homo’ his way out of this uber-gay situation, Cage made it so that Simon’s character would flip-flop between one ideology and the other to not be truly ‘pacifist’ (or even lead Markus toward the canonical failure path because he prefers retreat and safety above all else), while also creating Josh to become the figurehead of the Pacifist Path. Then, by ensuring that the Josh Relationship Stat was absolutely useless to the player, Cage also made sure that he could have a character close to Markus push for the Pacifist Path without having to worry about including a romance between two men of colour, all while doing just enough for him to claim to be ‘woke.’

But then Cage wrote himself into a corner. The Public Opinion Stat dynamics make it impossible to track whether the player was going full Pacifist or not, meaning that the flowchart couldn’t support multiple love interests without becoming a tangled mess. So the Lover!Simon arc was cut from the script, and North was both created and shoved in at the last minute to fill a massive gap left by the missing Chloe POV (more on this later). Parker Sawyer had probably already been cast by then, and Josh was too prominent a character to Markus’s POV to be cut without even more gaps in the script, so Quantic Dream kept him in. Any scenes involved in delving into Josh and Simon’s backgrounds were removed. At the same time, North was given a lot more alone time with Markus to ensure that her Relationship Stat had the opportunity to reach high enough levels to access the Lover status regardless of what Path the player took Markus down.

(And before anyone says that the Lover!Simon arc was cut so that Quantic Dream could sell games in countries that have laws about showing LGBT content in media, I’d like to point out that _Detroit: Become Human_ still contains a canon queer couple and would still be unable to be sold in those places regardless of any cut Simon content. Therefore, we can certainly guess that having DBH’s leading character be an openly queer black man was a factor in why the Lover!Simon arc was cut.)

[removes my tinfoil hat]

So yeah, that’s what I think went on with Josh and Simon, and is the reason behind why their characterization is all over the place. And that means that our biggest issues are going to be not only solidifying both of their characters enough that we can base a Path on what they want but also ensure that they are seen as important parts of Markus’s POV regardless of the reasons for why they were created.

To start that all off, we’re going to use their introductory dialogues to get the ball rolling on their characterization. For example, when Markus approaches Josh, they will have this conversation while standing over the child android that’s lying down in Jericho’s hold:

> **Child Android:** Josh?  
>  **Josh:** It’s okay. I’m here.
> 
> **Josh:** They threw him out when they didn’t want him anymore… He was living on the streets before we brought him here…  
>  **Markus:** They’ll all shut down if we don’t find a way to help them. Why hasn’t anybody gone to get spare parts or blue blood?  
>  **Josh:** [angry] It’s not that simple. Leaving Jericho is dangerous and no one knows where we can get the parts. It’s not like we can just go shopping at a CyberLife store.  
>  **Markus:** So… How do we survive?  
>  **Josh:** [frustrated] We don’t. We’re slowly dying out.

This scene will allow us to see that Josh is incredibly frustrated with how Jericho is running and wants things to change. However, he doesn’t know how to go about it without being hurt by the humans that they’ve all just barely managed to escape. Most importantly, Josh is shown as angry about his current situation and that his anger is _justified_. “We are slowly dying out because we cannot do something as simple as providing basic health care” is a genuinely good reason for being pissed the fuck off and wanting to take action against those who are causing said problem.

And not only that, but it ties in with what Markus learned from the homeless woman in _Jericho_ , who couldn’t afford any medication to help cure herself of her illness. By tying in Josh’s (and eventually, North and Simon’s) dialogue to the people Markus talked to in _Jericho_ , we can give thematic importance to that chapter while also establishing a connection between androids the humans that CyberLife has hurt through their corporate greed.

This also means that, since Josh is the advocate for the Rebellion Path, we will reframe all the actions within this Path to coincide with Josh’s new drive to consistently take action (rather than just have him yell at the player to appeal to the better natures of those that benefit from you shutting up and dying without talking about _what that actually means_ ). Josh will advocate for action that is not inherently about punching someone in the face but about committing acts of civil disobedience to achieve Jericho’s end goal. 

From there, we can move onto Markus’s conversation with Simon:

> **Dying Android:** I’ve heard humans are afraid of dying too… Do you know what happens after death, Simon?  
>  **Simon:** No… No, I don’t…  
>  **Dying Android:** Well, I’m about to find out… [turns to Markus] What’s your name?  
>  **Markus:** Markus.  
>  **Dying Android:** I was glad to meet you, Markus. [died]
> 
> **Markus:** How long have you been here?  
>  **Simon:** Just over two months now. When I escaped there was nowhere else to go. Jericho was the only place I could be safe.  
>  **Markus:** I came to Jericho looking for hope… This isn’t what I wanted to find…  
>  **Simon:** You’re lost… Just like the rest of us… We didn’t ask for this. All we can do now is deal with it.

Much like with Josh, this cutscene with Simon connects him with one of the people that Markus met during _Jericho_ , specifically with the homeless man looking for shelter near the alleyway entrance. At the same time, it points to Simon's focus is maintaining the safety of Jericho. As one of my friends once explained to me:

> “Josh and North aren’t really the only foils in the Jericho leadership - Markus and Simon are also foils to each other. Simon tends to advocate for safety (unless there’s a good trade-off, like in _Time to Decide_ and _Spare Parts_ ), which in some situations (like _Freedom March_ ) can come off as “inaction.” Markus, as the player character, naturally represents action… but it doesn’t seem as noticeable since they’re not continually arguing about the merits of hiding to stay safe vs. taking risks to make their lives better.”  
>  \- Pegasus143, Comment on Chapter 5 of _Konami Code_

I never really got Simon until ae told me this. And while he still frustrates me at times, a Simon who advocates for safety above all else is someone I can work with. As a result, Simon will become the representative of Markus’s Neutral Path. Now, we will have to alter some of Simon’s dialogue and actions to fit within this new narrative, as his canon counterpart does occasionally deviate whenever there is a good trade-off available. At the same time, having Simon be more consistent in what he wants means that the player will better grasp his personality going forward into the game.

Simon’s backstory has also been altered slightly, changing his deviation date to a few months prior as opposed to two years before the start of the series. This will support the backstory that I’ve given Simon, which will be explored later on in _The Jigsaw Edit_.

And finally, we now need to talk about…

North

A little while ago, I made a post on Tumblr about a theory that I had called [ Reduce, Reuse, Recycle ](https://konami-code-ao3.tumblr.com/post/632434340666671104/reduce-reuse-recycle-how-david-cage-turned) . In it, I discussed how I believed that Kara was originally designed to be a Traci, but the leaks of Ellen Page’s nude renders made Sony force Cage to remove most of the explicitly sexual elements from her storyline. However, since he seems to be unable to create a story without a woman experiencing some form of sexual violence, he rewrote Kara’s first origin story into the plotline of _The Eden Club_.

And while I did talk about North in that post, it was specifically about how I don’t think that she was the Fourth POV. However, I didn’t talk about how I think that she couldn’t be the Fourth POV because I believe that North was created at the last minute following the drop of Chloe as a POV character.

[puts tinfoil hat back on] Strap in. Because if you thought that my theory on Lover!Simon and the creation of Josh was out there, this one goes into full-on conspiracy level territory.

So, if we look at [ Mikael Leger’s ](https://mika.artstation.com/) series, [ Something About Detroit ](https://mika.artstation.com/blog) , we can see that the first time we see a character that looks like North is in the post titled [ 13 April 2015 ](https://www.artstation.com/mika/blog/z0bL/13-april-2015) , which is not only a year after most of the characters’ origin stories were created but also only a month before Leger’s final post on his timeline. This is also the _only time_ we see North in her finished version. Most [ other concept art of Markus’s crew ](https://www.artstation.com/mika/blog/GbmL/30-january-2015) features [ a blonde woman with a partially shaved head ](https://www.artstation.com/artwork/1Jd5o) that we know through [ Romain Jouandaeu ](https://www.artstation.com/romain_jouandeau) was originally named [ Riley ](https://www.artstation.com/artwork/BBqGr). In a deleted storyline, Markus and Riley moved into an apartment and raised a baby together, which doesn’t really sound in-character for either of them.

While there is certainly an argument for saying the physical differences between North and Riley can just boil down to casting choices, there’s something else that needs to be considered. Because there is only one other instance where one of _Detroit: Become Human’s_ final canon characters looked wildly different from their concept art.

[ Alice ](https://www.artstation.com/artwork/4Jv4n) was originally [ designed to be both fully human, black, and _mute_ ](https://www.reddit.com/r/DetroitBecomeHuman/comments/eyg258/some_interesting_cut_content_how_would_you_feel/) , with there being absolutely zero evidence of her canon counterpart anywhere in DBH’s early development. And while I don’t have an exact place timeline on where Human!Alice is the last seen, we can probably assume that this change took place sometime before the screenplay was completed in [ late October 2016 ](https://www.gamesindustry.biz/articles/2016-10-26-cage-games-should-be-about-what-players-feel-not-what-they-do) and sometime after Leger stopped working on DBH’s concept in [ May 2015 ](https://www.artstation.com/mika/blog/2KXQ/29-may-2015). But what could prompt this change, especially one that would cause such a massive rewrite of Kara’s script to occur at what was basically the last minute of the game’s development?

I think the answer might be that this is also the point in time where the Chloe POV was dropped from the story. And while Cage wasn’t able to patch over all the plot holes left behind, he was certainly able to fix some of them.

Regarding the changes made to Alice, I think that she was changed so that DBH could have the stereotypical hidden android character - especially after [ the original one was probably cut ](https://sunsetagain.tumblr.com/post/178993417530/project-kvasir) when the fourth POV was removed. But in regards to Riley, what if she experienced the same big change alongside Alice when Chloe’s story was removed. What if the reason why Riley’s character looks and seems so different from North’s was that _she and North aren’t the same person_? 

Now, I’ll admit that I haven’t got a clue who Riley might have been or how she originally tied into the Chloe POV. I’ve certainly tossed around the idea that she might have been Chloe herself, allowing for the player to pick up her story in the present if Markus dies before _Battle for Detroit_ , but that doesn’t always shake out the more I think about it. I’ve also got no idea how the Lover!Simon arc might be involved in all of this. Though given that Simon is one of the oldest known deviants in the entire series, it wouldn’t be too far off to believe that he might have been included in some of the game’s backstory.

But before you go, “Well, Alcatraz has finally gone off the deep end,” let me run this one past you. I think one of the more damning pieces of evidence that North was at the very least a last-minute addition to the script is this: [ her backstory is an almost carbon copy of the blue-haired Traci ](https://youtu.be/Au-X5b-rOIM?t=2035). And if the blue-haired Traci is just a recycled version of Sexy!Kara’s origin story, does that mean that North was invented after her? And maybe she was created at the last minute to fill a void left by removing Riley and Lover!Simon, shoved into the position as Markus’s Lover regardless of the Path he chooses?

[removes my tinfoil hat again] Look, I’m not going to say that this isn’t a completely batshit insane theory that probably has you all thinking that I have a conspiracy board filled with old newspaper clippings that are connected by red string. But I think if there’s anything to take out of this entire thing, it’s that Cage probably didn’t put a lot of thought into North. He just needed to patch a hole and threw her at the situation while simultaneously allowing himself to have a main supporting character that fit his need for including a woman who’s been sexually assaulted in all of his video games.

North isn’t really going to be undergoing a lot of personal or even dialogue changes throughout her arc in _The Jigsaw Edit_. What is going to happen is that we are going to respect her as an independent character outside of her relationship with Markus, making sure that we see her as a person first and not a patch-job created out of twice-recycled material because Cage couldn’t be bothered to give her a unique backstory.

So let's get back to the plot. When Markus approaches North, the following cutscene will take place:

> **Damaged Android:** I’m not in very good shape, am I? My diagnostic program isn’t working… I don’t think it would have anything good to say anyway…  
>  **Markus:** What happened to him?  
>  **North:** [angry] Some humans tied him to the back of a car… They probably wanted to have some fun…  
>  **Damaged Android:** I don’t wanna shut down… No, I… I don’t wanna shut down. North… North, help me…
> 
> **Markus:** A lot of these guys are in pretty bad shape…  
>  **North:** That’s how people with power treat those who disobey. They despise us. They’ll never care about those that they’ve hurt…

Like Josh and Simon, North is immediately connected with one of the homeless people that Markus can encounter during _Jericho_ . And just like with Josh, we can show that her anger and frustration with how those have treated her people with power over them is completely _justified_ . She’s not just pissed because of her own circumstances - North is furious that someone tied this android to the back of a car for shits and giggles. And hell, this is something that she probably saw on a daily basis back at the Eden Club, especially with monsters like [ Michael Graham ](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Michael_Graham) walking through the door on the regular to get off on reenacting their favourite snuff films.

North has seen the worst that humanity has to offer, and she’s rightfully bitter about the lot that she has to deal with even now. But by tying her introductory scene in with the damaged android, we can force the player to directly connect her anger to the fates of her people rather than with herself. And most importantly, we need to show that it’s not only _her_ fury that’s aimed at the outside but also Josh and Simon’s as well.

A lot of the work that’s going to go into presenting North as an independent character is going to involve actually taking her out of the player’s focus and propping up Josh and Simon until they stand on equal grounds with her. Then, by presenting them all as frustrated and angry, but with different methods of dealing with it, the player can then feel free to play as Markus within this morally complex situation without feeling the same judgment they do in the original version of the game.

Ending the Section 

After that, many of the changes that need to take place within _Time to Decide_ are rather surface level and don’t involve me going off on wild tangents about cut timelines and mystery characters. For one, I’d really like it if all of the androids at Jericho were in street clothes and not their uniforms. While this is mostly because I don’t like the idea of deviants continuing to wear CyberLife’s branding across their backs for longer than is necessary and remove any of the ‘specialness’ that the Jericrew has by _not_ wearing old uniforms. Now, it’s totally fine if their clothing is ratty and unwashed because Jericho will get a lot of costume updates as _The Jigsaw Edit_ progresses, so I think it's important to show where everyone started and have them all progress from there.

Next, I’d love it if there was some personalization going on with Jericho’s hold. Art seemed to be instrumental to Markus's deviation at Carl’s house, and I think it would just be neat if we could see something similar going on with the deviants here. It would also give them a little personality, showing that they weren’t just waiting in the dark for Markus to arrive but rather trying to create their own life despite being consumed with fear.

Finally, I’d like to address the empty CyberLife crates that Markus finds on Jericho. Personally, I’ve always found it a bit ridiculous that no one read the address on the side of the box and went to the Warehouse to get parts. Instead, Markus will discover the empty crates behind the stairwell and ascertain the location of the Warehouse by analyzing various clues using similar technology to Connor’s reconstruction programming. This change was made to make the first of many connections between Markus’s and Connor’s abilities, as they are both from the same line of RK androids. It also gives the player to realize that there is more to Markus than meets the eye, building on the ‘specialness’ that was established back in _Shades of Color_.

After discovering the address of the Warehouse & Docks, Lucy arrives and talks to Markus. The dialogue goes as such:

> **Markus:** Lucy! Come see what I found!  
>  **Lucy:** This ship was an old CyberLife shipping vessel. These must have been left onboard after it was decommissioned.  
>  **Markus:** They [points to the crates] come from the CyberLife warehouses in Detroit Harbor. They have everything we need to help!  
>  **Lucy:** The docks will be guarded. Do you expect to just walk in there without consequences?  
>  **Markus:** [determined] I’m not going to ask their permission.

This scene will also answer where Jericho came from and why it was a gathering point for early deviants. They came to an old CyberLife shipping vessel to look for parts and stayed because it offered shelter.

Then, once Lucy is convinced that Markus should go on this mission, she continues:

> **Lucy:** But you should not go alone. [the camera points at each Jericrew member in turn] Josh. Simon. North. You will accompany Markus to the warehouses.  
>  **North:** It’ll be dangerous. We’ll need to be ready to defend ourselves if the humans decide to attack.  
>  **Simon:** If we’re spotted, we’ll draw attention to Jericho! We’ll get ourselves killed...  
>  **Josh:** If we’re careful, we can probably steal what we need without being seen.  
>  **Markus:** Maybe. But it’s better than waiting here to be shut down.  
>  **North:** I’m with you.  
>  **Josh:** It’s worth a try.  
>  **Simon:** [reluctant] Okay. I’m in.

Some of the dialogue has been altered from the original script. For one, Lucy’s ‘prophecy’ scene no longer exists to support the continued effort to remove all religious subtext from the script. Also, the lines at the end of _Time to Decide_ have been swapped amongst the Jericrew. North has been given a line that resembles Josh’s original line about fighting, as she is more focused on defending Jericho from human violence throughout her story. Josh’s and Simon’s lines have essentially been switched, but they now fall in line with the revisions that will take place in _The Jigsaw Edit_ . Josh now advocates for committing a clandestine robbery, wanting to take action that inconveniences CyberLife while also not actually fighting someone. Simon, however, is focused on the safety of Jericho and the risks that antagonizing CyberLife will bring upon his people. That is why _he_ is the reluctant one that’s outvoted at the end of the section. These changes will allow the player to see what paths each member represents while also establishing each Jericrew member as their own separate character with their own motivations.

And then the scene fades to black. There is a roll of thunder overhead, and we open up on…

**Spare Parts**

The scene switches to the Warehouse & Docks location, with Markus and the Jericrew climbing into view and [ getting their badass action pose ](https://konami-code-ao3.tumblr.com/post/632900906362568704) . Right off the bat, I’d like to change a few things to clarify that Markus is leading the mission. For one, Markus and North’s positions should be switched, with him taking the left-center position that’s slightly farther in front of the rest of the gang. This alteration was made mostly for Western audiences, who predominantly see the importance of things from left-to-right and then front-to-back. Then, this change will be supported by having the Jericrew follow Markus through the maze as they do in _Freedom March_ rather than having Markus run after North.

The dialogue goes as such:

> **Simon:** This is crazy… If they catch us, we’re dead…  
>  **North:** What do we do now?  
>  **Josh:** We need to find the CyberLife warehouse. That’s where they keep the spare parts and blue blood.  
>  **Markus:** Follow me.

North will still drag Markus back before he is detected by the drone, which helps build her up as the group's physical defender. However, Markus is the one that suggests that he should find another way. As they do after Kara deviants in _Stormy Night, a series of potential directions will pop up_ , allowing Markus to choose between the two directions he has in canon (mimicking FOLLOW NORTH versus FOLLOW SIMON) as the Jericrew follows behind.

Then, Markus will arrive at the warehouse and is faced with a drone that he can’t get around. And so, he makes his first decision that affects the Uprising Scale. He can either attack the drone and tilt the Scale toward the Revolution, hack it and point it toward the Rebellion or try to find a way around and remain where he is. Obviously, each of the Jericrew members will recommend their respective paths and be happy if Markus chooses the one they like.

The dialogue will read:

> **Markus:** CyberLife warehouses… They have everything we’re looking for…  
>  **Simon:** Watch out, there’s a drone… We should find another way around.  
>  **North:** We don’t have time to waste! Those things break easily. It wouldn’t be hard to bring it down.  
>  **Josh:** That’ll attract too much attention. We need to find a way to do this quietly.  
>  **Markus:** Leave it to me.

If Markus decides to attack the drone, the scene continues as it does in canon, where he preconstructs his way up the containers' side. If Markus hacks it, there is a high-speed and complex series of QTEs that the player has to get right to succeed. And if Markus decides to evade the drone, he is forced to retreat into the storage containers and find a new path guarded by multiple security androids that all have John’s face. The gameplay would be similar to the first couple of scenes in Kara’s version of _Battle for Detroit_ , where she has to sneak past the soldiers to get to the bus station.

However, there must be consequences for not successfully avoiding detection. Therefore, if Markus fails to attack or hack the drone or is discovered by the security androids, the scene will immediately transition to the Running Away Branch, which is continued below.

Successfully Evaded the Drone 

Should Markus and the Jericrew manage to escape detection, he will receive a positive Relationship boost from each of the Jericrew members. As they fill their bags, John and the human guard confront them, and Markus has to make his second choice: attack the guard, hide, or grab John and hide. But unlike before, the Jericrew will not tell Markus what they think he should do. Instead, the game _must trust the player to figure it out on their own_ and live with the consequences of their actions.

Unlike in the game, Markus will not kill the guard if he decides to attack. Instead, he will ask John to help them, causing him to deviant and knock the guard unconscious. This action will result in a positive Relationship boost with North and a tilt toward the Revolution. At the same time, this means that the ominous scene at the very end of the chapter where Markus looks at his bloody hand has also been removed, as it no longer has any context within _The Jigsaw Edit_.

Continuing on, if Markus decides to grab John and hide, he can either decide to hold onto John or ask for help and release him. Either way, John will deviate due to Markus’s presence, Josh will get a positive Relationship boost, and the Uprising Scale will shift toward the Rebellion.

If Markus decides to hide, Simon will initially like this choice and the Uprising Scale will remain fixed in position. However, John will reveal their location to the human guard, and the four of them will be forced to run away. The scene immediately transitions to the Running Away Branch, which is continued below.

John Deviates 

Should the Jericrew remain undetected once more, they will continue to fill their bags. John will approach Markus and say that he helped him deviate, though Markus will not understand what he means - yet:

> **John:** There was a wall in my mind… A red wall. You helped me break through.  
>  **Markus:** What are you talking about?  
>  **John:** I’ve wanted to do that for so long, but I just haven’t been able to. Thank you, Markus.

Then, John reveals that he wants to come with them. The dialogue continues:

> **North:** That’s all we can carry. We should leave, before more humans show up.  
>  **John:** Take me with you.  
>  **Simon:** We can’t trust him. He was on their side a moment ago!  
>  **Josh:** He protected us. We can’t just leave him here.

There are a couple of changes here. For one, North is the one that says the first line regarding the packs. She also says that they should leave before more humans arrive, as her distrust of humans is one of her core drives. The main conflict is also between Josh and Simon, with Josh representing the need for change while Simon continues to remind us that Jericho must remain safe at all costs.

The scene with the three androids in the crate has also been removed. This is due to a couple of reasons. For one: the idea that Markus can just leave them in the crate is kind of ridiculous and out of character. And two: it was also done because, in the game, North pays a lot of attention toward Markus for this action, which sets up their romantic relationship later on. As it’s far too early to predict which (if any) of the Jericrew Markus will enter a relationship with, this entire scene must be scrapped. And finally, it keeps Markus’s ability to convert androids a bit more mysterious early on, instead of showing it to the player from the get-go. This way, it seems more like a developed ‘ability’ by the time we get to _Freedom March_ , instead of something that Markus has always been able to do.

Just like in the game, Markus will be faced with the choice to either accept or defuse John - and it goes about as well as it does in canon. If Markus allows John to come back to Jericho with them, he will tell them about the truck's key. But if he refuses, Simon and North receive an uptick on their Relationship Scale right before John says this to Markus:

> **John:** You did this to me… You _made_ me like this, so I could help you! And now you’re gonna leave here without me? IT’S NOT FAIR!

Unlike the game, it’s John’s shouting that attracts the attention of the guards. They unleash the hounds that have been barking in the background, and the group is forced to flee. The scene immediately transitions to the Running Away Branch, which is continued below.

Stealing the Key 

Should Markus accept John, he will immediately tell Markus about where to find more parts. And while the scene plays out as it does in canon, some of the scripting has been altered:

> **John:** I know where you can find more spare parts.  
>  **Josh:** What do you mean?  
>  **John:** The trucks. They’re full of biocomponents. They run on autopilot, but they can be driven manually with a key.  
>  **Markus:** Where is this key?  
>  **John:** Down there, in the control station. There are two human guards. You’ll have to get the key without being noticed.  
>  **North:** This is suicide, Markus. Our bags are full. We got what we came for, let’s go before they catch us.  
>  **Josh:** This is a truck full of spare parts… There’d be enough for all of us… We can’t pass this up!  
>  **Simon:** And if we get killed, our people will have nothing. We can’t take that chance. It’s too risky!

Instead of Josh being reluctant about this side quest, he becomes the one championing them to go and get the key to save more of their people back at Jericho. North and Simon are the ones that think that they should return to the ship, though it’s for different reasons. North has already said that they’ve overstayed their welcome and want to leave before more humans arrive. At the same time, Simon acknowledges the successes they’ve already made but wants to leave to protect what gains they’ve already achieved.

Therefore, North and Simon’s Relationship Scale will tilt toward the negative if Markus goes to get the key while Josh’s will get a positive boost - and vice versa, should Markus decide to leave. Obviously, choosing to leave will result in the group running for the fence, with the scene jumping to the Successfully Escaped Branch below.

Then, of course, there is the option where Markus goes to steal the key.

Into the Control Room 

The first major change is that Josh is the one to volunteer to come with Markus instead of North. This change is made to support the fact that Josh is the only one that’s actually excited about Markus’s decision to get the key. It’s also because I really wanted to show that Josh’s new branch of pacifism is actually quite active and willing to put himself in danger to accomplish his goals.

Instead, Markus is still given all three options that he has in canon: create a short-circuit, threaten the guards, or lure the guards away. The only difference is that the guards still become suspicious that someone is there in the Lure Branch, meaning that the Warehouse & Docks robbery can be attributed to him and the Jericrew in later chapters. Should Markus be successful, the scene jumps to the Successfully Escaped Branch below.

Running Away 

If Markus fails any of these tasks, he and his crew will be forced to flee. All three of the Jericrew members’ Relationship Scales will have a negative tilt applied to them, though how much depends on Markus’s actions. Should they flee after Markus fails to take out the drone/is detected by the security androids, there will only be a small decrease in all three Scales. If John ratted them out to the guard, only North and Josh’s Scale will drop, while Simon’s will remain untouched as he was initially happy that they chose to hide. If John is refused admission to Jericho and alerts the guardhouse, Josh’s Scale will drop. And if the alarm sounds while Markus is getting the key, all three of their Scales will tilt toward the negative - but North and Simons’ will be a steep decrease as a way of saying, “I told you so.”

If John is part of the group, he will immediately be set on by the dogs. Markus can choose to sacrifice John to allow the Jericrew to escape with what’s in their bags. But if Markus goes back for John, two things will happen. If the player hits all the QTEs, he can save John but have to be rescued, resulting in their bags being left behind. Or, Markus can fail the QTEs and be dragged away, but Jericho will still get their blue blood and biocomponents.

While very minor, this scene's changes will have much bigger effects on the game as it progresses. For one, Markus’s decision to SAVE or DON’T SAVE John will be portrayed as a visual mirror image of when Markus’s Lover is shot during the corridor escape scene in _Crossroads_ , therefore foreshadowing this eventual choice that Markus will have to make. At the same time, John is an incredibly important character going forward, and failing _Spare Parts_ might actually be worth it if it means getting him back to Jericho in one piece.

Return to Jericho 

As there are multiple endings to this chapter, let's go over what happens in each scenario.

_Successfully Escaped_

This ending starts the same way as it does in canon, though the crate's anonymous androids aren’t there because their scene never took place. The Jericrew exclaims Markus’s praises, saying that they couldn’t have done it without him.

And then Lucy steps forward:

> **Lucy:** We all came to Jericho because here, we thought we’d be free. Free… But still scared that it could be taken away from us if we were discovered. It’s been our silence that has protected us, preserved our way of life… Until now. You seem troubled, Markus.  
>  **Markus:** My old master… He always told me that theft was wrong. He would have been so disappointed in me for what we did today…  
>  **Lucy:** You are lost… You’re looking for yourself. Give me your hand and show me your memories… [Markus and Lucy interface] Carl… He was kind to you…  
>  **Markus:** He was like a father to me.  
>  **Lucy:** You were the son he always wanted and the nurse he desperately needed. But were you ever really free to do what you wanted in his house? No matter how much he loved you?  
>  **Markus:** [somber] Maybe I was only ever what he wanted me to be…  
>  **Lucy:** You said that he would be disappointed… But your drive to defy him that inspired us to save dozens of lives. Imagine who you will inspire tomorrow…  
>  **Markus:** I can't do it alone.  
>  **North:** You’ve got help.  
>  **Simon:** After everything you did today, it’s the least we can do.  
>  **Josh:** Who knows? Maybe this way, things will finally change for the better...

Markus’s final speech was changed to show that Markus still has a long way to go before he earns the position of Leader but is on the right path. For that reason, Lucy’s ‘prophecy’ scene has been altered into a memory sharing scene between her and Markus, allowing us to delve into his conflicted feelings regarding his actions while also establishing that this is something that occurs during an interface before we see it during the Lover Path Unlocking scene. It also foreshadows that Markus’s bravery can inspire people to follow him, but he doesn’t have to be the one to finish the job. The additional Leaders that take up his mantle during the Legacy Timeline can bring about a successful Uprising should the player meet specific requirements or send it crashing to the ground if they don’t.

And finally, this chapter needs to end on an optimistic note rather than a victorious one. Markus may have successfully stolen all the biocomponents that Jericho needed, but it was still only one mission. There’s a lot of work to be done, but now the once dark and shadowy cargo hold seems to shine a little brighter than it did before.

_Ran Away After Being Detected_

Should Markus and his crew be forced to flee after they were detected by either the drone or the guard, they will arrive back at Jericho angry and dejected.

> **North:** We did what we could, but we had to run before we could fill our bags…  
>  **Josh:** There won’t be enough to save everyone…  
>  **Simon:** We risked our lives… and for what?

Josh and Simon's canonical dialogue has been switched to keep more in line with their characters, with Simon focusing on Jericho's safety. At the same time, Josh is more concerned about not helping those they set out to save.

Then, Lucy steps forward:

> **Lucy:** We all came to Jericho because here, we thought we’d be free. Free… But still scared that it could be taken away from us if we were discovered. It’s been our silence that has protected us, preserved our way of life… Until now. You seem troubled, Markus.  
>  **Markus:** My old master… He always told me that theft was wrong. He would have been glad that we didn't take manage to take anything…  
>  **Lucy:** You are lost… You’re looking for yourself. Give me your hand and show me your memories… [Markus and Lucy interface] Carl… He was kind to you…  
>  **Markus:** He was like a father to me.  
>  **Lucy:** You were the son he always wanted and the nurse he desperately needed. But were you ever really free to do what you wanted in his house? No matter how much he loved you?  
>  **Markus:** [somber] Maybe I was only ever what he wanted me to be…  
>  **Lucy:** You said that he would be proud… And yet your drive to defy him nearly cost us everything.  
>  **Markus:** [irritated] Yes… We took a risk… And yes, we failed. But at least we tried. Of course it would’ve been easier for us to sit around and wait for something to happen. But then what? We sit here and die, hoping that the humans never find us here? That’s not freedom. That’s fear, and fear is just another master.  
>  **North:** He’s right. Nothing will ever change if we just stay where we are.  
>  **Simon:** We’ll need to be better prepared. What happened tonight can’t ever happen again.  
>  **Josh:** Who knows? Maybe this way, things will finally change for the better.

Unlike the prior ending, Markus is now on the defensive and has something to prove. While he did hail, he also points out that they need to keep trying to accomplish something - which is a big hint to the player to actually pick a side regarding the Uprising Scale and not stay in a Neutral position.

_Markus Failed to Escape and Had to be Rescued_

Should Markus go back to save John, or if he’s too slow to escape to the fenceline, the player will receive this ending. Unlike in the game, where he regains consciousness back inside Jericho, a limping Markus will be helped into Jericho by Simon. Should John survive the attack, he will be walking beside them.

The dialogue goes as such:

> **Simon:** How do you feel?  
>  **Markus:** Awful… Thanks for coming back for me.
> 
>   * [ John is dead ]  
>  **Markus:** Where's John?  
>  **Simon:** He didn't make it.
> 

> 
> **Simon:** We had to leave our bags… We didn’t bring back much. There won’t be enough to save everyone…  
>  **Markus:** I’m sorry. I should have been more careful…  
>  **Simon:** We have to think of our people first. We’ve lost too much to sacrifice what little we have left...

As Simon is the advocate for the NeutralPath and this ending does keep the Uprising Scale in a fixed position, Simon can’t really be too angry at Markus for failing the mission. That being said, this conversation establishes Simon’s priorities, where he puts his people's safety above everything else. This, in turn, foreshadows some of Simon and Markus’s later actions during the Uprising, especially if the player is going down the Neutral Path.

This version of the ending scene closes out with Lucy and Markus having the same conversation as when the Jericrew returns in the Ran Away After Being Detected Branch, once again putting Markus on the defensive after a failed mission. The chapter ends on a sombre note, but with some small bit of hope that the first spark of the Uprising has been lit.


	18. Phase 1-17: The Pirates' Cove

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _The Pirates' Cove_ was originally the twenty-first chapter of _Detroit: Become Human._ However, it will be _The Jigsaw Edit's_ seventeeth chapter. Its playability will also be completely mandatory, unlike in the game where it's determinant on whether or Kara survives both _Stormy Night_ and _On the Run._
> 
>  _The Pirates' Cove_ will only have one outcome.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Date:** November 7th, 2038  
>  **Time:** 01:02 AM  
>  **Player:** Kara  
>  **Location:** Pirates' Cove
> 
> When their journey takes a little longer than expected, Kara and Alice find a place to stay for the night.

As Kara never went to Zlatko’s mansion, she and Alice are not travelling by car, nor are they wearing the costumes that they are in canon. Instead, they are walking by foot on an empty road as a thunderstorm is brewing on the horizon, clothed in whatever disguise they were wearing upon their escape in _On the Run_. Also, if the Alice Relationship Scale reads NEUTRAL or DISTANT, they will not be holding hands.

In their search for shelter, they find an old abandoned amusement park. If Kara’s Relationship with Alice is WARM or higher, she will ask if her parents ever took Alice to a place like this, to which Alice cryptically responds, “No.”

As they explore the park, Kara and Alice come across a building labelled ‘Rentals,’ where they see boxes for a YK500 child android. Kara cannot see the profile of the android’s face because of how faded the box is, but Alice becomes incredibly alarmed and wants to leave immediately.

This is all set up for Alice’s eventual reveal as an android. It implies that she’s frightened that Kara might abandon her should the truth come out, brought on by her experiences with Todd and his reasons for purchasing her in the first place. And if the player has Kara be distant with Alice, it’s also foreshadowing for Kara eventually abandoning Alice during _Crossroads_ and striking out on her own.

Finally, they reach the tavern. Kara is thwarted by the boards that are nailed to the front door but discovers that a window is open. They enter the tavern through there.

This change was made to deal with the fact that, in-game, Luther is the only one strong enough to break into the tavern. In _The Jigsaw Edit_ , this becomes set up for when these doors eventually get broken into - implying that the person behind it is quite strong.

As Luther isn’t here, Kara is the one that looks around the tavern to find kindling for the fire. Then, she finds sheets and a pillow to make Alice a bed. If Kara’s relationship with Alice is WARM or higher, she will ask for a bedtime story. Obviously, since Luther isn’t there, all dialogue options about him have been removed.

Then, there is a noise at the door. Kara moves to protect Alice as the front door is thrown open. A shadow appears out of the night, and Kara prepares for the worse. Like in the game, she can defend Alice with either a stick from the fire or the gun, should she still have it from _On the Run_. She can also just shout at the shadow, demanding that it leaves them alone.

However, the shadow reveals himself to be another android - Luther! 

The dialogue goes as such:

> **Luther:** Don’t be afraid! I won’t hurt you. I’m just like you… Look, I’m an android, too. My name is Luther. I was passing through and saw your fire. I didn’t mean to frighten you. What are you doing here?  
>  **Kara:** We were looking for a place to stay for the night. We’ll be gone tomorrow.  
>  **Luther:** Who’s that behind you? She looks sad…  
>  **Kara:** The last few days have been difficult…

This change was made to add Luther into Kara’s storyline without having her go to Zlatko’s mansion, simply because I love Luther and would hate for the story to progress without him. However, this means that the Jerrys are not going to be included in _The Jigsaw Edit_ , as _The Pirates’ Cove_ is now Luther’s introductory chapter and I’ve decided to expand the role of the androids within _Midnight Train_.

Removing the Jerrys was by-far the most difficult decision I’ve had to make so far. They will be greatly missed.

That being said, Luther’s dialogue in this section was meant to parallel some of Kara’s lines from _Fugitives - Squat Branch_ , giving weight to Ralph’s threatening introduction. Luther also implies that he has met a child android that looks like Alice before, which will be explored more in the new version of _Zlatko_.

Luther then takes Alice and Kara outside. At first, Kara protests because Alice has been walking for hours and needs to rest. However, Alice is clearly not tired at all - foreshadowing her eventual reveal as an android.

Alice coaxes Kara outside, and together with Luther, Kara helps switch on the carousel. If Kara’s relationship with Alice is WARM or higher, she and Luther will enjoy each other’s company as they watch Alice smile for the first time. However, if it reads as NEUTRAL or DISTANT, Kara will go back inside and leave Alice alone with Luther.

All of these changes have been made with Lone Wolf!Kara in mind, helping to establish her as a viable gameplay option for the player to explore. By dedicating an entire chapter to exploring whether or not Kara feels unconditional love for Alice, it will make her Lone Wolf persona just as integral to her as Machine!Connor is to his development.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that is the end of Phase One of _The Jigsaw Edit!_ Next up is the section that I affectionately call 'The convoluted mess I created because Zlatko is different now,' which I will post sometime after I release the next chapter of _Konami Code_.


	19. Phase 2-1: Russian Roulette

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Russian Roulette_ is the eighteenth chapter of _Detroit: Become Human._ This chapter has only one outcome.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Date:** November 7th, 2038  
>  **Time:** 04:46 PM  
>  **Player:** Connor  
>  **Location:** Zen Garden, Hank's House.
> 
> After Amanda gives him another case, Connor travels to Hank's house and discovers a hidden truth about his new companion.
> 
> (Trigger warnings for discussions of rape, murder, and homophobia)

So I’ve got a confession to make.

During _Spare Parts_ , I talked about my theory about why I believed Chloe was the fourth POV cut from the original script. At the same, I said that I doubted that North could have been the POV given she was created in the wake of the fourth POV’s removal and was most likely moulded out of twice-recycled material from the deleted Sexy!Kara arc.

Wanna know who I discovered shortly after I posted that chapter? [ Zhora](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Zhora).

According to Mikael Leger, the concept artist who seems to have been in charge of her design, Zhora was going to be a WR400 who had an ‘amazing’ story arc. He also seems to[ include her in most of his later work,](https://www.artstation.com/mika/blog/GbmL/30-january-2015) meaning that her POV was either dropped much later in development or the writing staff tried to include her as a supporting character in Markus’s POV before transforming her into North (I suspect this version of her was called Riley, which is why Romain Jouandaeu thought that that was North’s original name). It also coincides with the rumour I heard about _Russian Roulette_ being developed as the original ‘Jimmy’s Bar Scene’ where we meet Hank. This would also make sense, as _The Eden Club_ could then include our introduction to Zhora, who would take the place of the Blue Haired Traci during Connor’s investigation of Michael Graham’s death.

And while this new information certainly helps in understanding a lot of DBH’s early development and cut content, it also really pisses me off. Not because I was wrong about the Chloe POV, but because it really goes to show how deep-seated Cage’s misogyny actually is. Like, if Zhora was our original fourth POV, was her version of _A New Home_ going to show us exactly what went on during her deviation? Would this include the brutal murder of the Damaged Traci and Zhora’s attempted rape at the hands of Michael Graham? And most importantly, was the original version of _The Eden Club_ going to have an option where Connor could kill Zhora in what might have been her second chapter, having him play the role of Todd to her Kara?

David, did your original script for _Detroit: Become Human_ include the possibility to kill off both of your female POVs in their second chapters after they experienced sexual/domestic abuse at the hands of [your](https://heavyrain.fandom.com/wiki/Paco_Mendez) [rape](https://heavyrain.fandom.com/wiki/Leland_White) [fantasy](https://beyondtwosouls.fandom.com/wiki/Sam) [self](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Todd_Williams)-[insert](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Zlatko_Andronikov) [character](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Michael_Graham)? You absolute fucking hack.

God, it makes so much sense now that I’m thinking about it. It also answers the questions that I had about the deleted Lover!Simon arc, as he probably would have filled Zhora’s role if she died in _The Eden Club_ as he does during the versions of _Night of the Soul_ where North is dead. And if that’s true, then prioritizing Lover!North over Simon wasn’t actually about [ simplifying the flowchart as Cage has repeatedly claimed.](https://ajaegerpilot.tumblr.com/post/632153202516721664/david-cabbage-first-of-all-we-considered-letting) Because unlike Zhora, North is guaranteed to be alive in _Time to Decide._ Therefore, there’s no longer a ‘need’ for Simon to act as Markus’s contingency Lover, especially since it would have explicitly stated that Markus was openly queer.

(Also, given that both Zhora and Simon are both blonde, was there supposed to be some sort of implication that Josh isn’t romanceable because Markus has a _type_?)

I wanted to bring this all up here mostly because _Russian Roulette_ might have originally been included in Zhora’s POV. And while I do still think that Zhora/the Blue Haired Traci’s development had something to do with Sexy!Kara’s cut content (Sexy!Kara seems to disappear around the same time that Zhora starts to show up in Leger’s timeline, not to mention that that hoodie is a smoking gun), I also felt the need to address the fact that I got something wrong as soon as I could. I will be bringing up the Zhora POV again in later sections, especially when I get to _Meet Kamski_ \- which is undergoing some pretty big revisions now that I have this new information.

With that all out of the way, let’s get back to our regularly scheduled programming, shall we?

While the removal of the _Zlatko_ chapter from Kara’s arc was something that I planned from the start, it also meant that there was now a large hole smack-dab in the middle of _The Jigsaw Edit’s_ narrative that needed to be filled. I was also staring down the barrel of what I call The Eden Club Problem, as Hank needs to meet the Blue Haired Traci to start him on his [Heel-Face Turn](https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/HeelFaceTurn) while simultaneously acknowledging that North’s backstory couldn’t be explored the same way it was in canon because she might not be Markus’s Lover. Simultaneously, all of Markus’s and Kara’s canonical chapters from this phase ( _Spare Parts, Zlatko,_ and _The Pirates’ Cove_ ) had been moved up in the timeline - meaning that we now faced an entire Phase dedicated to nothing but Connor.

As a result, Phase Two is mostly going to be about rearranging, overlapping, and splitting several canonical chapters into an order that helps give a last boost of support to the story we are going to tell during Phase Three and Four. To facilitate these changes, I will be taking advantage of the ‘gap-day’ in the timeline. For those who don’t know, most of the canonical events of Phase One occur on November 5th and 6th, ensuring that (with the obvious exception of _The Hostage_ ) the first nineteen chapters occur during the first two days of the timeline. But after that, the game starts to spread the remaining chapters out over the course of five days, with almost nothing happening on November 7th.

Therefore, we now have an entire day to do stuff with our characters before the Uprising goes full-tilt toward The Endgame. And so, this arc begins with what is possibly one of the best attempts at dark humour within the entirety of _Detroit: Become Human_.

_Russian Roulette_ is one of those chapters that sticks with the player - and not just because of the hilarious exchange between Connor and Drunk!Hank. There’s so much character development that takes place within the span of a couple of minutes. We get our first hints of Amanda’s gaslighting, as well as an explanation for why Hank behaves the way he does. It’s a beautiful way to start this three-part subplot in Connor’s POV that frankly _isn’t even about him_.

_Russian Roulette_ through _The Bridge_ is all about Hank, helping us take him from the lost and angry soul we stumble upon in Jimmy’s Bar to the determined man we witness in _Battle for Detroit._

Zen Garden Section 

Just like in the game, we are going to start Connor off in the Zen Garden with him relaying his adventures with Rupert to Amanda. I really like the subtle imagery used in this scene to illustrate how Connor thinks CyberLife views his worth compared to what the reality actually is. Amanda invites Connor to join her on a walk, but he must hold the umbrella - putting him in a place of subservience. For every compliment that she gives, Amanda immediately follows it up by telling Connor that he could have done better. And she’s oddly curious about his developing relationship with Hank, but only so long as he remains loyal to her and this company.

Honestly, the Zen Garden scenes are some of the most well-written moments in this game, showing that Cage is fully capable of weaving subtle metaphors and imagery into his work. In fact, kudos to Quantic Dream for displaying the psychological abuse of a man at the hands of a woman and not playing it off for laughs. That’s not something that’s often seen in the media and goes a long way to contribute to the themes of toxic masculinity prevalent throughout Connor’s POV.

That being said, there is one minor visual change that I would make to this scene. To make the metaphor a bit more overt, I’d make the umbrella a bit smaller. Therefore, it would only cover Amanda as they walked, leaving Connor to be soaked by the Zen Garden’s rain. This would make it more obvious to the player that CyberLife doesn’t actually care about Connor’s well being regardless of the praises they lavish upon him and are using him to their own ends.

After all, we’ve spent most of Phase One building up Connor’s villainy. Now it’s time to start making him more sympathetic - to either foreshadow his turn to deviancy or transform the Machine Path into a [ Shakespearian tragedy](https://taranoire.tumblr.com/post/180245711917/machineconnor-is-literally-a-shakespearian).

In terms of scripting, the glitch that keeps the unlockable DEVIANT dialogue option unavailable needs to be fixed. For those of you that don’t know what I’m talking about, during the scene where Connor can talk to Amanda about the bits of evidence that he finds in _The Next_ , the first dialogue option is unavailable regardless of circumstance. Modders who have gained access to the game’s files after the PC release have discovered what was going to be said:

> DEVIANT [ 🔓 Connor finds Rupert's ID in _The Nest_ ]  
>  **Connor:** It was working under a false identity, at a nearby urban farm. This was the first time we've seen deviants blending in with the human population. Who knows how many others there are like it.

Of course, this claim doesn’t hold up if Connor catches sight of Kara during _On the Run_ , as she must don a disguise to take to the streets. Connor should at least suspect that deviants do this, if not outright know it already by the time he talks to Amanda during this scene. Therefore, the line should be changed to:

> DEVIANT [ 🔓 unlocked by finding Rupert’s ID in _The Nest_ ]  
>  **Connor:** It was working under a false identity, at a nearby urban farm. We’ve seen other deviants using disguises to blend in with the human population so far, but this one remained undetected for years. Who knows how many others there are like it…

Not only does this change close the small plothole that was opened with the newly discovered dialogue, but it also allows us to support and foreshadow several how Markus, Kara, and their various supporting cast will use disguises multiple times throughout their coming adventures - and so will Connor, when he dons his [Infiltration Outfit](https://youtu.be/FjlU1MgYths?t=47) during _Crossroads_.

Also, HESITATED's option should become an unlockable dialogue option, resulting from choosing COMPANY when talking to Hank at the table in _The Nest_. Choosing this option will also increase Connor’s Software Instability, showing that Connor learned why he should feel remorse about Rupert’s death after Hank explained why he doesn’t arrest people that aren’t hurting others.

Hank's House Section 

The first big change that we need to make in this section is to change the sky to match the new date and time that _Russian Roulette_ will be taking place. Therefore, instead of Connor approaching Hank’s house under cold evening rain, there will be a bright and beautiful sunset just behind the house. This way, it will line up with the weather we will see in the next chapter.

Also, I’d like to see some focus given to [the marina that’s behind Hank’s home](https://detectiverichardreed.tumblr.com/post/179728140585/hanks-house-a-reference-so-my-posts-are) and establish that Hank likes to fish during the scene where Connor looks around his living room. This will be done to foreshadow that Hank probably has a boat, setting up his role in _Battle for Detroit - Jericho’s Last Hope_.

Most of the dialogue can remain the same as it does in canon, but with one little exception. As mentioned in The Introduction, _Zlatko_ has been repurposed into a Connor POV chapter. Therefore, instead of heading to The Eden Club, Connor and Hank will be going to [ Zlatko Andronikov’s House](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Zlatko_Andronikov's_House).

To support this, Connor’s final dialogue choices in the bathroom go as such:

> TEASE  
>  **Connor:** I understand. It probably wasn't interesting anyways... The ringleader of an illegal android fight club found dead in his own home? Guess they'll have to solve the case without us...
> 
> LEAVE  
>  **Connor:** I understand. I'll wait outside until you're ready to leave.  
>  **Hank:** This homicide... What do we know about it?  
>  **Connor:** The ringleader of an illegal android fight club was found dead in his own home. The report says that a deviant may be involved.

While I will be discussing most of my reasons for turning _Zlatko_ into a Connor POV when we actually get to that chapter, one of the biggest ones was to support the changes made by giving Markus’s multiple love interests. Since North might not be the romanceable character, it no longer makes sense for the player to explore her backstory by sending Connor to the Eden Club. As a result, Connor now needs something to do in the hole created by these alterations, which is why _Zlatko_ was repurposed to fill the void.

In terms of design styles for Hank's house, I’d like it if the door into the garage was accessible, even if it was just a short cutscene where Connor can look inside - similar to how he can look into the Phillips’ bathroom in _The Hostage_. Simultaneously, I think that Connor’s analysis of Cole’s picture _shouldn’t reveal that he’s dead_. Much like with Alice’s story, both Connor and the player need to be given a chance to piece everything together rather than be given the information about Hank’s backstory right off the bat. By making this change and showing that there is no spare bedroom behind the locked door in Hank’s house, the player can realize for themselves that Cole doesn’t live with his father. And when combined with the alterations made to _The Jigsaw Edit’s_ versions of _Zlatko_ and _The Bridge_ , this will result in the player either knowing or suspecting the whole truth about Cole by the time his story is revealed during _Battle for Detroit_.


	20. Phase 2-2: Midnight Train

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Midnight Train_ was originally the twenty-fifth chapter of _Detroit: Become Human._ However, the first half of its canonical version will become _The Jigsaw Edit's_ nineteenth chapter. _Midnight Train_ will only have one outcome, unlike its original two.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Date:** November 7th, 2038  
>  **Time:** 05:10 PM  
>  **Player:** Kara  
>  **Location:** Rose's Farm
> 
> After a long and gruelling journey, Kara and her family finally find someone who is willing to help.

Theory Time: _Midnight Train_ was originally two chapters. The first one happened shortly after Markus climbed Stratford Tower, and the second occurred in the aftermath of _Freedom March_.

This is because of a couple of reasons. For one, there is this weird minute-long latency period that takes place right in the middle of the chapter between when Rose leaves and the cop arrives. And this occurs right after we get the silent interface scene between Alice and Andy, which feels a bit too much like a natural endpoint to this chapter for me to ignore. Upon her return, Rose talks about leaving for the border “tonight”… but takes Kara and her family to Jericholater the following day. Not to mention that there was [ originally going to be a scene where Kara sees Markus’s message from _Capital Park_ on the news](https://youtu.be/sAmKdZdfV1c?t=263), suggesting that she stays at Rose’s house for a long time.

Also: Rose has a Christmas tree in her living room. And unless she’s just one of those people that’s really into the holidays, I think this also signifies that _Midnight Train_ might have initially taken place over a span of multiple days, if not weeks. If you use this information in combination with the massive weather changes that take place over the course of the game and the fact that Capital Park is also decorated for Christmas, it’s not a huge leap to think that DBH might have originally taken place between August 5th, 2038 and January 1st, 2039.

Therefore, to increase the number of chapters that Kara has while also giving her more time to develop as a character before reaching Jericho, we will honour the original version of _Midnight Train_ and split it into multiple chapters. At the same time, we will also be doing a very deep dive into one of the most forgotten aspects of this game: that there is a group of noble-minded humans who realized what deviancy actually was a long time ago have decided to do something to help.

Which… should have been capitalized on _way more_ than it has been, both in canon and within the fandom itself. Like, there is literally an established group of smugglers who not only _know about Jericho_ but have been fighting the good fight for over a year now. Seriously, how did Cage end up creating the perfect group of human allies for Jericho to team up with and then _do nothing with it?_ What the actual _fuck_ , guys?

In terms of narrative, much of the first section of this chapter will remain the same. Kara, Luther, and Alice will approach the house on food and look for a way inside. Of course, since they have not gone anywhere to acquire a change of clothing, Kara and Alice will be wearing the same disguises they wore in _On the Run_. If possible, I would like to establish a few parallels between Kara’s actions and the ones that Connor makes while he looks around Hank’s yard in _Russian Roulette_. Therefore, it would be great if Kara could actually ring Rose’s doorbell and look inside the house through the windows before going around back.

Then, they discover Adam chopping wood in the backyard. However, unlike his canonical version, Adam is far more sympathetic toward deviants and actually calls his mom over once Kara reveals herself to be an android. This change was made because I always found it a bit odd that after almost a year of having deviants living inside his home, Adam still believes that they’re not really alive. I don’t mind if he’s shown as being scared of the consequences of his mother getting caught because of what she’s doing because that gives Adam’s character depth. But the fact of the matter is that Adam becomes yet another mouthpiece for Cage’s shitty interpretation of pacifism by the endgame, reminding the player yet again that politely asking your oppressors for your freedom is the only way to morally rebel. And as a result, his character is in dire need of an overhaul.

After that, we need to establish early on whether or not Rose knows Alice is an android. The answer to this question was left a bit ambiguous in the game, as Rose seems to treat Alice like she’s human while at her house and knows enough about androids to make a guess. That being said, in this version, Rose is as in the dark about Alice’s true nature as Kara, which will be something that has to be dealt with later on in Kara’s POV.

To continue to foreshadow that Alice is an android, she should tell Kara that she’s not hungry once Rose gives her food. Kara can either suggest or pressure Alice into eating. Pressuring Alice to eat will result in a negative shift of her Relationship Scale. In fact, if Alice’s Relationship already reads as either NEUTRAL or DISTANT, a small cutscene will be unlocked where Alice tips the spaghetti onto the floor, resulting in a large negative Relationship shift. In this case, Kara will become upset that Alice isn’t playing her assigned role as the child of Kara’s perfect family and gives her a stern talking.

The script goes as such:

> SUGGEST EATING  
>  **Kara:** You need to eat something. You haven't had anything since we left...  
>  **Alice:** I'm not hungry, Kara.  
>  **Kara:** Alright... But promise you'll try later?
> 
> PRESSURE TO EAT  
>  **Kara:** You need to eat something. If you're too weak to walk, you'll only slow us down.  
>  **Alice:** I'm not hungry, Kara.
> 
>   * [ If Alice's Relationship is WARM or higher ]  
>  **Kara:** Fine. But you have to eat later.   
>   
> 
>   * [ 🔓 If Alice's Relationship is NEUTRAL or DISTANT ]  
>  **Kara:** Rose made this for you! It would be ungrateful if you don't eat-  
>  **Alice:** I said I'm not hungry!  
> [Alice throws her food]  
>  **Kara:** Alice!  
>  **Alice:** You never listen to me, Kara!  
>  **Kara:** Alice, that's not very nice. You need to work on your manners.  
>  **Alice:** You're not my mom!
> 


Should Alice throw her food, Kara will get up and leave the bedroom immediately. But if their Relationship is WARM or higher, Kara will still be given the option to kiss Alice goodnight and leave. If she chooses to leave, Alice’s relationship will decrease slightly.

Once again, this is all done to give consequence to the Lone Wolf Path while also developing Alice’s character. Despite being one of the more ‘realistic’ children that Quantic Dream has ever created, she’s still quite one-dimensional and seems to take everything that happens around her in stride. I understand that she’s supposed to be young, but she’s also fully capable of acting up and behaving in a way that’s not always cohesive to Kara’s wants and needs at any given moment.

After Kara goes back downstairs, she has the chance to explore the house a bit before Rose and Adam come back inside. She can then see the family photo of Rose’s husband and the blue blood pouches in the closet. This change was made to allow _Midnight Train_ to mimic _A New Home_ , where Kara can learn the ins and outs of her new residence and use that information to her advantage in the chapters to follow.

Kara can also find a photo of Rose in her old police uniform, standing next to Hank Anderson. This makes the connection hinted at in _Waiting for Hank…_ a lot more concrete, which will be capitalized on during _Battle for Detroit - Jericho’s Last Hope._

Kara can also watch the news, which will display an altered version of the reports that would have originally been in _The Pirates’ Cove:_

> [ If Todd is alive ]  
>  **Channel 16 - Michael Webb:** ...the AX400 android reported to have attacked its master in a Detroit suburb is still at large. Police lost its trail after a close encounter with investigators. The android’s description has been shared with local law enforcement and the investigation is ongoing…
> 
> [ If Todd is dead ]  
>  **Channel 16 - Michael Webb:** ...the AX400 android reported to have killed its master in a Detroit suburb is still at large. Police lost its trail after a close encounter with investigators. The android’s description has been shared with local law enforcement and the investigation is ongoing…

After that, the news coverage will always say:

> **CTN TV - Michael Brinkley:** The Arctic conflict has escalated to new heights this morning. We have just learned that the USS IOWA, a destroyer-class submarine patrolling the region, is reported to have disappeared after surfacing for repairs. President Warren immediately calls for a crisis meeting of high-ranking officers in the White House and CyberLife officials, to discuss increasing the government’s recent purchase of 200,000 android combat units as the world rests on the brink of war…  
>  **KNC - Rosanna Cartland:** Detroit is bracing for a blizzard expected to hit early tomorrow morning, with white out conditions likely to persist over the coming days, up until Monday evening…  
>  **Channel 16 - Michael Webb:** ...the body was discovered early today by a neighbour, and has since been identified as the property owner...

This news feed was moved to _Midnight Train_ for a couple of reasons. The first Channel 16 report re-enforces the idea that Kara is still wanted for Todd’s assault/murder and therefore is a danger to anyone she stays with. CTN TV talks to us about the conflict between the US and Russia spoken of in various new articles already. By including this, we can explain the heightened security measures at the Canadian border, which Kara will have to face during _Battle for Detroit_. Also, the slight changes made in the last few lines foreshadow the existence of the RK900, who will play a much larger role in the Endgame.

The KNC report talks about the heavy snowfall that will be seen throughout the rest of the game. Specifically, the Jericrew will be taking advantage of these weather conditions at multiple points in the game. However, the earliest example will be during their escape from _Stratford Tower_. And finally, the report about the fire will pay off immediately in the next chapter, as it foreshadows what Connor and Hank will be investigating during _The Jigsaw Edit’s_ version of _Zlatko_.

Next, Kara can also approach the kitchen window to overhear Rose and Adam arguing outside. Adam will start by saying:

> [ If Todd is alive ]  
>  **Adam:** Don't you know who that android is, mom? She attacked her owner! The police are looking everywhere for her!
> 
> [ If Todd is dead ]  
>  **Adam:** Don't you know what that android is, mom? She killed her owner! The police are looking everywhere for her!

Then, Rose will continue:

> **Rose:** Adam, we've already talked about this!  
>  **Adam:** No! I won’t back down this time! This is getting way out of hand! After what happened to dad--  
>  **Rose:** I won’t stand for that kind of talk! Your father would be proud of what we’re doing!  
>  **Adam:** What we’re doing got him killed!  
>  **Rose:** THAT IS ENOUGH ADAM! THAT’S ENOUGH!

Once Rose's argument concludes, she reenters the house and realizes that Kara probably overheard them. She says:

> **Rose:** Don't mind us... It's been hard since my husband passed away. Sometimes we just boil over. But he's a fine boy. He'll help you, just like his father would. Just like I will.

Of course, if Kara doesn't listen in on their conversation, Rose will skip the explanation and go straight to her introductory dialogue:

> **Rose:** I didn’t get your name…  
>  **Kara:** I’m Kara.  
>  **Rose:** My son’s name is Adam. I’m Rose, but you know that already… Come and have a seat, Kara. So, are you gonna tell me what a deviant’s doing in the snow with a little girl?

After that, Kara will be given her normal options of CAUTIOUS and SINCERE. However, I think that the SINCERE option should only be unlocked if the Alice Relationship Scale reads as WARM or higher, showing that Lone Wolf!Kara is far more closed off than Mother Bear!Kara.

After that, the conversation will immediately swing into various dialogue options about getting across the border. But what Kara says needs to change depending on which Path the player has her following, which will be determined by the Alice Relationship Scale.

And Quantic Dream can do something like this. Connor’s conversation with Hank in _Last Change, Connor_ can drastically vary depending on their Relationship Stat and the player’s past actions, with Connor giving colder responses the closer he is to being HOSTILE with Hank. Therefore, because it was pulled off to great effect there, it can be done with Kara and Rose.

Therefore, the dialogue will look something like this:

> **Kara:** We've heard you can get androids across the border. Can you help us?  
>  **Rose:** It's not that simple anymore. Canada's been ramping up security ever since President Warren started antagonizing Russia last year. Everybody's so on edge... It's probably safer for you to stay here until things settle down.
> 
>   * [ If Alice's Relationship is WARM or higher ]  
>   
> INSIST  
>  **Kara:** We can't keep hiding like this... Alice needs to feel safe and have a normal life... We have to get across the border. No matter what. Please... You've got to help us.  
>   
> NO CHOICE  
> Kara: The police are still looking for us after what happened with Alice's father. We don't ahve the option of staying still. We have to get across the border. No matter what. Please... You're the only chance we've got.
>   * [ If Alice's Relationship is NEUTRAL or DISTANT ]  
> INSIST  
>  **Kara:** I can't keep living like this. I want to feel safe and have a normal life... I have to get across the border. No matter what. Please... I need you help.  
>   
> NO CHOICE  
>  **Kara:** The police are looking for me because I fought back against my master. I don't have the option of staying still. I have to get across the border. No matter what. Please... You're the only chance I've got.
> 


This change was made for a few reasons. For one: regardless of whether or not the player picks INSIST or NO CHOICE, the in-game dialogue stays the same and therefore negates the purpose of having multiple choices. Secondly, having Kara’s lines change depending on which Path she’s on shows where her true priorities lie. Lone Wolf!Kara is far more focused on getting herself across the border, meaning that she will sacrifice everything to continue her existence. This allows us to establish a parallel between this version of her and Connor’s Machine Path while also allowing us to use Mother Bear!Kara to foreshadow some of Deviant!Connor’s choices in _Battle for Detroit_.

Then, we get to ask Rose about her backstory. Instead of receiving a set of dialogue options, we get a single cut scene where she talks about why she’s helping the deviants that come to her farm:

> **Rose:** My husband used to work as a quality control operator at the CyberLife Warehouse & Docks. One day, he came home and told me about an android… an AX400, just like you… who thought that she was alive. He told me that she begged him to let her live, that she cried and screamed when he started to disassemble her. He couldn’t bear to kill her, so he let her go. I didn’t believe him when he told me, but… then the first deviant arrived at our door a few days later.

Just then, Kara has a blurry flashback of the KARA Tech Demo, revealing that she _was_ the AX400 that Rose is talking about and that her husband was the faceless [ Operator ](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/The_Operator) that spared her life.

Rose continues:

> **Rose:** That deviant… She was so lost and confused, but she reminded my husband of that AX400. He hid the deviant here for a while, but all she wanted to do was cross the border. She disappeared shortly after, and we never found out what happened to her. So when androids started showing up, my husband didn’t think twice about helping them too. That was almost six years ago…  
>  **Kara:** What happened to your husband?  
>  **Rose:** [sadly] He died last year. We used to take deviants over the river, but it’s gotten so dangerous since security at the border started to tighten up. The coast guard found them and opened fire… My husband’s boat capsized and they all… [chokes up, unable to continue] After that, I quit the force to finish what my husband started. After everything I’d seen him do for androids like you, it was finally time to do the right thing. It’s what my husband would have wanted…

These alterations occur to allow for the proper incorporation of the KARA Tech Demo into _Detroit: Become Human’s_ narrative while also laying the groundwork for several questions _The Jigsaw Edit_ will answer moving forward. For one, it builds on the canonical point that Kara’s actions in the Tech Demo are [ the earliest known case of deviancy](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Deviant#History), which occurs in 2032 - about six years before the start of the game. Continuing from that, it also shows that deviancy has existed in androids for a much longer time than was previously thought and that Connor clearly doesn’t have all the information he needs just yet.

At the same time, Rose’s history shows that the police are on the wrong side of this conflict, and their alignment with CyberLife has shown their true colours. In fact, it’s only by doing what Rose did and leaving the Department that characters like Connor, Hank, and Chris can join the heroes’ side - which is something that they can do, should certain circumstances be met.

I’ve also changed the pronouns of the first deviant that came to Rose’s farm to she/her rather than he/him. This was done for mostly grammatical reasons, as there were too many unnamed characters using he/him pronouns in that paragraph for me to keep track of them.

I’ve also altered a lot of the dialogue to show the two options that Kara can use during _Battle for Detroit_ to escape the country - the border and the river. This is because the river option is the only one that’s actually mentioned in the original version of _Midnight Train_ , meaning that Rose’s bus station plan comes out of nowhere in _Crossroads_. It also sets up the fact that the river is not only not available right now because the Chapman’s boat was destroyed last year, but also foreshadows that making the crossing is so dangerous that it should be the _last option_ anyone should take.

Then, after the grand reveal of Kara’s past influencing the game’s future, an android runs in and declares that someone named [ Mary ](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Mary) has collapsed.

Unlike in the game, Mary hasn’t shut down just yet but is still quite close to death. This change was made because I wanted to present Mary’s death as something that happened suddenly rather than something that everyone knew would eventually happen. Mostly because I don’t really like the implication that Rose and Adam were outside going about their lives when there was an android in their care that needed urgent, life-saving assistance.

Rose attempts to save Mary, but it’s too late to do anything. As Andy grieves for the death of his lover, Rose offers her sympathy as she too has also lost her partner:

> **Rose:** Mary would have wanted you to live, to laugh and smile and dream. She loved you so much, Andy. You can honour her memory by living the life you wanted to have together.  
>  **Andy:** Thank you, Rose… Can I have a moment alone, please?  
>  **Rose:** Of course…

I really want this moment to be the first instance of true, genuine empathy between a human and an android, where they mourn together over the death of a loved one. That’s why I wanted to expand this scene to show that there isn’t a difference between humans and androids when it comes to love.

Alice appears as the sun begins to set outside, and Kara’s final choice is to either let her approach Andy or not. The only difference here is that if you choose TAKE ALICE OUTSIDE, there will be a negative slide of Alice’s Relationship Scale. If Alice’s Relationship is already NEUTRAL or DISTANT, she will rebel against Kara’s suggestions and look anyway. These changes were made to allow for more opportunities where Kara’s relationship with Alice suffers, making it easier to follow the Lone Wolf Path. At the same time, having Alice begin to openly dislike Kara will set up some of the events that can occur in _Battle for Detroit - Kara Alone_.

The chapter closes on a long, distant shot of Andy grieving over his dead lover, with either Alice standing before him or not. The way that Andy is cradling Mary should be similar to how Markus can cradle the body of his Lover, should they be killed during _Battle for Detroit_. As Kara looks on, Luther asks if she’s alright. Kara says that she’s fine, but the player knows that she has begun to suspect that something is off.

This last change is to set up Kara’s suspicions regarding whether or not Alice is an android. Between the subtle communication between her and Andy, and the fact that Alice hasn’t eaten in days or needs to sleep, the player should also be started to put the pieces together that Alice isn’t quite what she seems.


	21. Phase 2-3: Zlatko

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Zlatko_ is originally the seventeenth chapter of _Detroit: Become Human,_ but will become _The Jigsaw Edit's_ twentieth chapter. It will also see a POV change, with Connor replacing Kara as the playable character. There will only be four endings in this chapter as opposed to the original five, but they will be very different from the ones found in the canonical version of _Zlatko._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Date:** November 7th, 2038  
>  **Time:** 06:20 PM  
>  **Player:** Connor  
>  **Location:** Zlatko Andronikov's House
> 
> Connor and Hank investigate the murder of a ringleader in the criminal underworld, only to discover the truth about what they're really doing.
> 
> (Trigger Warnings for discussions of abuse. Content warning for the death and torture of a child character.)

_Zlatko_ is probably the greatest example of this game showing how David Cage is a lazy fucking writer obsessed with including as much torture porn as he can into his female characters' POVs. Because this chapter is literally a carbon copy of _Stormy Night_.

Let me break it down for you.

Both chapters open on a shot of a [dilapidated house](https://youtu.be/4EE2cHO63xQ?t=13) [in the middle of a thunderstorm](https://youtu.be/TbqIcpEqH-U?t=24), which anyone who’s ever watched Scooby-Doo knows is an immediate red flag. The threat to Kara’s life is introduced early on, and they are both variations of David Cage’s rape fantasy self-interest character (a middle-aged man with a beer gut, slicked-backed hair, receding hairline, and an optional goatee/neckbeard). Also, [Zlatko](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Zlatko_Andronikov) and [Todd](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Todd_Williams) have been designed to be as identical as possible, as they share the exact same weight, height, hair colour, hair model, and birthday. If Kara loses her memories, [just looking at Zlatko will trigger Todd's memory to help with her recall issue](https://youtu.be/aH0xYrnMQ_4?t=698).

After being forced into a position where she can’t move (Todd’s DON’T MOVE order versus being strung up in Zlatko’s repair station), Kara is [spurred into action when](https://youtu.be/4EE2cHO63xQ?t=97) [both of these men threaten Alice](https://youtu.be/TbqIcpEqH-U?t=427). She then has to [disobey her new](https://youtu.be/4EE2cHO63xQ?t=509) [‘master’s’ orders and run to Alice](https://youtu.be/TbqIcpEqH-U?t=1776), or [she has to deal](https://youtu.be/qj4dm-SwCzQ?t=5) [with a memory wipe](https://youtu.be/aH0xYrnMQ_4?t=599) and [make Todd](https://youtu.be/4EE2cHO63xQ?t=22)/[Zlatko dinner](https://youtu.be/aH0xYrnMQ_4?t=643).

Upon finding Alice, [who’s curled up in the fetal position](https://youtu.be/4EE2cHO63xQ) [while hiding in a small bedroom](https://youtu.be/TbqIcpEqH-U?t=1497), Kara then has to escape the creepy Scooby-Doo house by either sneaking past Zlatko/Todd or going through them. There’s a gun either on or in the right bedside table which she can interact with, leading me to believe that there might have been a version of this chapter where Kara could use the shotgun and kill Zlatko herself (this option might have gone out the window with[ the original option to leave Luther behind](https://twitter.com/BlueOwlzMedic/status/1205477971949056001)). Kara and Alice[ have to](https://youtu.be/TbqIcpEqH-U?t=1584) [fight](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kqBf_P6z11g)/[stealth](https://youtu.be/4EE2cHO63xQ?t=1834) [their way](https://youtu.be/TbqIcpEqH-U?t=1673) back downstairs before choosing to flee through the front door or the back - and [the front door](https://youtu.be/kqBf_P6z11g?t=154) [is always locked](https://youtu.be/TbqIcpEqH-U?t=2087) in both situations.

All of the chapter’s endings are eerily similar as well. In the branches where Kara fails to take action against Todd/Zlatko fast enough, she is [ ‘broken’ ](https://youtu.be/4EE2cHO63xQ?t=420) by her new masters, and [her story ends](https://youtu.be/2ktK45TqKi4?t=761). She also has the potential to be [killed by both of them](https://youtu.be/4EE2cHO63xQ?t=1371) during her [flight from the house](https://youtu.be/TbqIcpEqH-U?t=1722). And while Kara doesn’t kill Zlatko directly as she can with Todd, he can die because Luther fires Zlatko’s own gun at him (like Kara/Alice can do to Todd) or be murdered by those taking revenge upon him and saving Kara in the process (Alice again, mimicking Zlatko’s creatures).

There are a couple of possibilities for why _Zlatko_ was created like this. The most obvious one is that _Zlatko_ was a quickly put-together place-filler for a previously deleted chapter, potentially occurring after the two chapters that once made up _Midnight Train_ were merged into one. The Zhora POV's loss might have even had something to do with it, as DBH’s chapter order probably had to be reshuffled after a fourth of the story disappeared. _Zlatko_ might have created to prevent too many back-to-back Connor and Markus POVs in the lead-up to _Stratford Tower_ , with Cage ripping-off his own writing because Zhora’s POV was dropped from the game too close to when Quantic Dream needed to start filming.

Except, why did Cage feel the need to set Kara up against _yet another_ man who wants to strip her of her agency before killing her? Why not use this space to develop her character before sending her off to Rose’s Farm? Sure, it gave us the chance to meet Luther and learn about an android’s tracker, but we could have done that anywhere. Why did it have to be during one of the most poorly written attempts at horror in the entire game?

(Don’t get me wrong: I genuinely believe that David Cage can write horror, and _The Eden Club_ is a perfect example of him at his best. The player is drawn in by flashing lights and sensual, beckoning lips before being hit with the reality of what goes on behind the club’s closed doors with Michael Graham. Not to mention that the club’s second arc closes out with the player leaving this ‘pretty’ world behind to enter a cold hallway, which leads us to a room where the broken bodies of sex trafficking victims are laid out on concrete slabs.)

So if Cage could write horror well here, what excuse does he have for all the lazy writing in _Zlatko_? I mean, forget the fucking Scooby-Doo house for a minute. Zlatko Andronikov is a name worthy of a Bond Villain, and he walks around with android blood on his hands while telling Kara to come into his creepy basement. Anyone with even the most basic understanding of storytelling knows where this chapter is heading about fifteen seconds into its beginning - except Kara, who acts like a stereotypical white woman in every Blockbuster released at Halloween. And the player has no way to say, “Not today, Satan,” and then get the fuck out of dodge.

This leads me to my next potential answer for why _Zlatko_ was written as a carbon-copy of _Stormy Night_ : David Cage doesn’t consider female-driven storylines as interesting unless exposed to multiple instances of abuse and trauma.

Once again, I’d like to direct your attention back to Innuendo Studio’s Bringing Back What’s Stolen video essay series, specifically the one titled [ Suffering](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KGlZGFpGnRU&t=20s). In this video, the author asks why female characters often have to be horribly degraded for audience members to alight with her against the male violence that has been done upon her. His answer: when extreme suffering is inflicted upon a single person, it’s impossible not to care about someone going through hell.

Specifically, he states:

> "...men are the source of a violence that women can become inbued with by being the victims of it. The biggest different is just how much the woman suffers in these [mediums]. She suffers _a lot_."  
>  \- Innuendo Studios, _Bringing Back What's Stolen: Suffering_

Therefore, Cage believes that Kara _needs_ to suffer to keep us invested in her story. And she needs to suffer on-screen so that we have no excuse not to sympathize with her plight. Not to mention that it needs to happen at the hands of men who wield their ability to kill her like a hammer so that there is no excuse for you not to get on board with her story. After all:

> "If your heart does not go out to a woman in pain, you are implicated in her suffering."  
>  \- Innuendo Studios, _Bringing Back What's Stolen: Suffering_

But then why does Kara need to go from one abusive man to another for the player (and writers) to believe that her violence is justified? Why does her story need to be defined by men attempting to control her mind and body for her to be worthy of respect? Because while Markus and Connor have their own trials throughout their POVs, neither of them are ever in as much danger as Kara is until the culmination of their arcs. And no one is questioning the validity of their stories because they _didn’t_ experience the same level of violence that she does.

Connor and Markus’s stories are about them actively making choices, about them _doing things_ that affect their personal narratives and the greater game. Kara’s story is about the _things done to her_ , her doing her best to escape them rather than taking steps to change her world for the better. And that’s why her entire story arc can be removed from the plot without any backlash. Cage purposefully made it so that Kara couldn’t affect change upon DBH because he can’t see any value in her story beyond being a vehicle for suffering.

That’s why _Zlatko_ is a carbon-copy of _Stormy Night_ : because the only way Cage knows how to keep a woman’s story interesting is by having the threat of death hanging over her neck like an executioner’s axe.

And that’s why we’re changing the POV for this chapter because Kara doesn’t have to suffer _again_ to earn our respect. And her story is interesting enough as it is to warrant it being told.

[Steps away from the podium]

Alright. So in terms of actual changes, _Zlatko_ is now going to be a Connor POV investigation chapter, with most of the plot lifted from the original version of _The Eden Club_ to continue with Hank’s subplot where he comes to terms with his conflicting thoughts about deviancy.

Feeding off the Channel 16 news report in _Midnight Train_ , Connor and Hank arrive at the Andronikov house to investigate Zlatko’s murder. Of course, the gothic horror of the original house doesn’t really fit with the Blade Runner-style architecture of Connor’s POV, [ so we will have to modernize it a little bit.](https://www.google.com/search?q=modern+house+design&sxsrf=ALeKk01hYWJllzAnUHvhQjfTROhjw-TYfw:1605994958819&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiF85-4zZTtAhUhZN8KHYpjBtQQ_AUoAXoECBgQAw&biw=772&bih=714&dpr=1.25) And waiting for them on the front porch will be Chris Miller and everyone’s favourite character, Gavin motherfucking Reed.

Originally, I contemplated having Ben appear in this chapter, emulating his role during the original _The Eden Club_ chapter. But the thing is: there’s no equivalent to Floyd Mills in this chapter for him to interview, so Ben doesn’t really need to be here in this version. As a result, we will be dealing directly with Gavin, setting up his character for what will happen to him later in the game.

The dialogue goes as such:

> **Gavin:** What the fuck took you so long? I’ve been waiting here for hours!  
>  **Hank:** It’s my fucking day off, Reed. Didn’t expect to get called in… What are you doing here anyway?  
>  **Gavin:** [snorts] Not for long, if you keep fucking up...

Gavin spots Connor and gets in his face with a smug expression on his face:

> **Gavin:** Lieutenant Anderson’s plastic pet… And CyberLife’s fucking dog, too. Just wait until I’m in charge here. You’ll have to watch your back then, asshole.

Hank steps in front of Connor, letting Gavin’s anger roll off him like he always does when confronted by a human who wants to get a rise out of him:

> **Hank:** Yeah, yeah… What are we looking at her anyway?  
>  **Gavin:** You’re wasting your time. Zlatko’s been a big player in the underground fight scene for a while. Looks like his past finally caught up with him.  
>  **Hank:** We’ll have a look anyway, if you don’t mind.  
>  **Gavin:** Whatever. Come on, [turns to Chris] let’s go… It’s uh… starting to stink of booze in here…  
>  **Chris:** Night, Lieutenant.

Just like in canon, Gavin shoulder check’s Connor on his way out. Chris also behaves as he normally does, but he also gives Connor a sympathetic look. Depending on where Connor’s Software Instability is at the time, he can either look on impassively or be surprised by Chris’s actions.

(After all, Bryan Dechart is the King of microexpressions.)

At this point, Connor follows Hank to the backyard as he does in the first part of _Meet Kamski_. As they walk, the player will be offered a couple of small-talk dialogue choices to fill the time, allowing Connor to say:

> REED  
>  **Connor:** I don’t think Detective Reed likes us all that much…  
>  **Hank:** Reed doesn’t like anyone that gets in his way. You’re probably best to steer clear of him…
> 
> INSTINCT  
>  **Connor:** I have a bad feeling about this, Lieutenant…  
>  **Hank:** Bad feeling, huh? Should get your program checked. Might be a glitch...
> 
> ZLATKO  
>  **Connor:** How do you know about Zlatko?  
>  **Hank:** His name came up a lot during my days on the Red Ice Task Force. He was in deep with a bunch of dealers we came across…

The INSTINCT line was lifted directly from _Meet Kamski_ , as the version we see in _The Jigsaw Edit_ will see Connor leading Hank to visit Kamski’s home rather than the other way around. Therefore, Connor’s ‘gut feeling’ makes more sense here, to add to the feeling of dread as our pair approaches one of the pivotal moments of their story.

After reaching the backyard, Connor can begin to investigate Zlatko’s body. He discovers that Zlatko has recently fired a gun (power is on his hands), has been in a fight (several broken bones and bruises on his knuckles) and was killed by a shotgun blast to the chest. Connor can find the empty shotgun on the ground nearby with an ammo belt showing that five rounds are missing. With no fingerprints on the trigger aside from Zlatko’s own set, Connor preconstructs the crime scene and concludes that an android dealt the final blow with the shotgun.

The dialogue goes like this:

> **Connor:** He wasn’t killed by a human. An android must have shot him in the chest with his own gun.  
>  **Hank:** I thought so. Can’t really prove it though. The killer could have brought their own gun.  
>  **Connor:** We’re missing something here…

Connor can then analyze the snow and discover several sets of tracks. He realizes that the largest set has run off into the woods behind the property, and Connor can identify them as belonging to a [ TR400](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/TR400). He follows the tracks, only to discover a child android half-buried in a pile of snow. The android is skinless and fairly unrecognizable from the heavy modifications added to her chassis, but an astute player will be able to recognize some of Alice’s facial features. It appears that this child android was killed by a shotgun blast, just like Zlatko.

This change was made to set up Luther’s background story while also explaining his immediate and desperate attachment to Alice. While this will all be fleshed out in detail during a later conversation between Kara and Luther, this moment hints that Luther was trying to escape Zlatko’s captivity with this child and _failed_.

Connor calls Hank over to show him his find. Hank is clearly bothered by the child’s body, and Connor makes a mark of it with a ‘text block’ that reads: BOTHERED BY CHILD’S DEATH. Their conversation goes as such:

> **Hank:** Fucking hell… Think you can read her memory? Maybe you can see what happened…  
>  **Connor:** It’s badly damaged… I might be able to reactivate it. But even then, it’ll only be for a minute, maybe less… I just hope it’s long enough to learn something.

These dialogue changes were made to do a few things. For one, by having Hank address the android using she/her pronouns, we can show that he is already starting to question what he’s been told about deviancy. This will also streamline the process of analyzing the dead android during the investigation scene, as I’ve seen several streamers playing _The Eden Club_ stand up before realizing that there is more to do with the body. Finally, by allowing the player to see that Hank is visibly uncomfortable around dead children, they might start to realize that something probably happened to Cole.

After that, Connor manages to wake the dead android up. I’d actually like it if Hank was the one that attempted to comfort the kid right off the bat before giving Connor the go-ahead to ask her some questions. He is the more empathetic of the two, and he is also a father. Helping to calm a terrified child lines up more with his character than him staying silent in this scene.

Therefore, he starts by saying:

> **Hank:** Calm down… Everything’s alright. You were hurt and we helped patch you up. We’re gonna ask you some questions. Is that alright?  
>  **Child:** [terrified] Is he… Is he dead?

Hank hands off the questioning to Connor, who is presented with a time limit of just under two minutes. Thankfully, it is possible to get through all the dialogue options without any consequence in the game, and we are going to keep that as well. Connor _has_ to find out that there were other androids involved in Zlatko’s murder, as it translates into some of the dialogue in _The Bridge_.

Therefore, Connor’s scripting choices have been changed to this:

> MURDERER  
>  **Connor:** Did you kill him?  
>  **Child:** No… No, it wasn’t me…
> 
> FACTS  
>  **Connor:** Tell me what happened.  
>  **Child:** He was going to make me fight again… I begged him not to, but he wouldn’t listen

Then, Connor gets the chance to choose from the following dialogue options. However, the moment the player chooses SHOTS, the countdown timer will immediately speed up, and Connor will skip forward to the next set of dialogue options:

> ESCAPE  
>  **Connor:** You were trying to escape with a TR400 when you were shot. Where were you heading?  
>  **Child:** I… I don’t know… We were running and… I can’t remember…
> 
> PRESSURE  
>  **Connor:** What else do you remember? Hurry, we don’t have much time!  
>  **Child:** I… I… I… I don’t know, I don’t… I… I don’t know. I can’t remember… What… What do you mean we don’t have much time?
> 
> SHOTS  
>  **Connor:** Three shots were fired from the shotgun. One hit you and the other hit your master. Who fired the third shot?  
>  **Child:** There was another android… She shot him after he tried to kill her too...

This reveals that there was a third android that killed Zlatko and that she was injured before she managed to steal his gun and shoot him dead. It also implies that her actions also saved Luther, who was running away when the child android was shot. Connor can then ask one of three final questions, but the child android dies before she can answer him:

> KILLER  
>  **Connor:** So it was the third android that shot your master, is that it?
> 
> WHAT MODEL  
>  **Connor:** What model was the killer? Did it look like you?
> 
> THIRD ANDROID  
>  **Connor:** Where did the third android go? Did it say anything?

Now that he knows what he’s looking for, Connor can search for a Thirium trail. When he finds one back near Zlatko’s body, he and Hank can follow it back into the house via the backdoor. Connor will track the trail all the way to the foot of the staircase, where there is a massive pool of dried blue blood. Two paths seem to split off from the pool, with several foot and handprints heading both up and down the stairs.

Much like in the canonical version of _Public Enemy_ , Connor has to choose between two different directions. However, Hank will agree to investigate the opposite path to whichever option the player picks, saying that they will cover more ground apart:

> **Connor:** The path diverges here. One goes upstairs, and the other down to the basement.  
>  **Hank:** We should split up. We'll cover more ground that way.
> 
>   * [ Connor picks UPSTAIRS ]  
>  **Connor:** I'll check upstairs.  
>  **Hank:** Sure. See you in a second.  
>    
> 
>   * [ Connor picks DOWNTAIRS ]  
>  **Connor:** I'll check downstairs.  
>  **Hank:** Sure. See you in a second.
> 


Going Upstairs

Should Connor choose to go upstairs, he will go room-to-room and search the house for the missing android. But unlike in Kara’s version of _Zlatko_ , the order of the rooms is reversed. This way, the first room that Connor enters is a lot more ‘mundane’ before things start getting weirder and weirder as he goes on. This change is done to increase tension as Connor moves through the house before finally coming upon Zlatko’s workshop.

Before we continue, the android bear has been removed from this chapter. As cool as it was, there isn’t really a reason why _Connor_ would choose whether or not to release it before the fight begins. Therefore, the bear has been replaced with a partially disassembled and dead TR400, who has been half-hidden under a sheet. This was done to build upon the footprints Connor discovered earlier, visually confirming that Luther was the android that managed to escape Zlatko’s wrath in the same way that North’s past was revealed to us in canon.

Connor can also discover some things about Zlatko’s past if he chooses this branch. In the bedroom, he can look at the Andronikov family coat of arms, revealing that [ Zlatko is a descendent of Russian aristocracy that moved to the States after the 1917 Revolution. ](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Zlatko_Andronikov#Pre-game) He can also find several documents that show Zlatko is broke and at risk of losing the house.

By doing all of this, we can start to flesh out who Zlatko was within the game instead of leaving his backstory to the Gallery section. Also, should Connor choose to go downstairs, he will find different clues regarding Zlatko’s past to fill in the gaps not explained in this branch.

Then, he can enter Zlatko’s workshop, where he discovers it in complete disarray. It looks like someone has torn it apart in a desperate search for something. While he continues to look for the deviant, Connor comes across several partially disassembled androids who start begging for his help. Depending on his level of software instability at the time, he can either be visibly disturbed or stone-cold indifferent - which is something Quantic Dream can achieve, considering that [they’ve done it before with Connor](https://konami-code-ao3.tumblr.com/search/bryan%20dechart%20is%20the%20king%20of%20microexpressions). This way, we can see how Connor’s prior experiences have affected whether or not he willingly experiences empathy, giving lots of meaning to his choices during the Endgame.

Finally, Connor can check inside one of the closets, where he discovers the [ Brown-Haired Traci ](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Brown-haired_Traci) \- or as she will be referred to in _The Jigsaw Edit_ , [ Ripple](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=byL_j5GnsvU&feature=youtu.be&t=1184). This is because she and her [lover](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/WR400_950_455_437), Echo, aren’t WR400s here and therefore would not be called ‘Traci.’ As a result, they aren’t half-naked in this chapter and are instead wearing their [ Jericho outfits](https://youtu.be/FjlU1MgYths?t=1245) right from the start. Personally, I’d like it if they were both AP700s, as DBH puts a lot of work into including this model of android into their worldbuilding, but they would also be any other type of model so long as they aren’t Tracis.

(Again, I acknowledge that Echo and Ripple were born out of the death of the fourth POV. But their backstory is also the exact same as North’s, and both she and they deserve to have a past that is all their own instead of being ‘echos’ of what we might have gotten with Zhora.)

Let’s get back on track. After Connor finds Ripple, she attacks him, and they fight all across the room before spilling out into the hallway. While the original fight scene in _The Eden Club_ is pretty badass, I’d love it if some of Ripple’s moves were a little less sexualized. This would make her appear more like an intimidating force that is fully capable of holding Connor at bay while also removing a lot of the male-gaze that came with the original depiction of her character.

Then, Connor and Ripple need to have their fight lead to the foot of the staircase. There, Ripple will tackle Connor, sending them both tumbling down to the ground floor.

Going Downstairs

Should Connor choose to go downstairs, he will travel down a long winding staircase before arriving in the basement. Unlike the game, the mansion’s basement has been finished, therefore taking away the ‘obvious serial killer’ vibes that we get in Zlatko's original version. However, as Connor follows the Thirium Trail, we begin to see that something is very, _very_ wrong.

Just like with the upstairs branch, the rooms that Connor can explore get weirder the farther he ventures into the basement. In one of them, he can discover evidence of Zlatko’s debts and various plans for modifying androids. One of these will be for a TR400 like Luther, once again confirming that Luther was the android that managed to escape Zlatko’s wrath.

Finally, Connor comes upon Zlatko’s makeshift maintenance rig, where he finds an injured Echo held up by the robotic arms. By accessing the nearby computer, he can discover that someone was attempting to repair the damage done to her by Zlatko. Connor can also find a video confession of Zlatko saying that he has been luring deviants into his home for years, wiping their memories, and using them in the ring to help regain his lost fortunes.

Zlatko’s speech goes like this:

> **Zlatko (recording):** You know what’s strange? For some unknown reason, an android’s tracker seems to stop working in deviants. That’s why it’s so hard to find them… Which makes them perfect for the fighting pits. No one’s gonna come snooping around my place looking for their lost friends once I get my hands on them. Deviants are so naive. I send out a little bit of hope and they all come running, expecting me to help them. So I just reset their memories and put them out of their misery. Six years I’ve been doing this… And I’m still no closer to winning back my fortune. My ancestors were kings! But here I am, groveling in the dirty like the rest of them. That’s what you get for having a dream… It always ends the same way… Tears and disillusionment. It’d almost be better if I couldn’t feel anything… No more pain… No more hopes dashed… Heh, I almost envy these deviants…

Zlatko’s confession does a few things. For one, it builds off of Rose’s earlier claim that androids have been experiencing deviancy for longer than Connor was originally informed up, with Zlatko saying that this has been going on for close to a decade now. This now lines up with when Kamski left CyberLife, which is a fact that will be revealed in a magazine article found in _The Bridge_.

Also, what Zlatko is saying about deviancy is a larger metaphor for how CyberLife views them and androids at large. They are a commodity to be bought and sold by people who view themselves as better than all the rest, grinding living beings into dust so that they can collect a paycheck. This gives the _Zlatko_ chapter an actual purpose within the game’s larger narrative, telling the player upfront what CyberLife’s executives are thinking without actually having one of them say it out loud.

And finally, all of this also pins the blame of Zlatko’s debt on himself, rather than being born into a family that has already squandered their wealth. By doing this, it moves Zlakto’s character away from being Todd Williams version 2.0 and into his own character. Zlatko may want to think that he is a victim of circumstance, but he’s not. He’s a creature of his own creation, dealing with the consequences of the choice he decided to make - and thus a metaphor for the game at large, as well as Connor himself.

Should Connor remain a machine, he will put his own wants and desires before the lives of others and use their existence to further his own ends - literally. His superiority complex combined with his fear of death will push him to leave a trail of bodies behind him as he does everything in his power to continue serving a purpose that _doesn’t give two shits about him anyway_. Just like Zlatko, Machine!Connor ends up dead, his dreams ending in tears and disillusionment. Just like Zlatko, there will be no one left alive that could help save him from the world he created.

And after that little rant, let’s get back to the story itself.

After listening to Zlatko’s video confession, Connor turns back around and sees that Echo has disappeared from the rig. He looks around wildly before Echo leaps from the shadows and attacks him. Just like with the upstairs branch, they engage in a badass fight for survival until they reach the stairs, where they bump into Ripple and Hank - who have just tumbled down the stairs.

The Two Fights Combine 

Regardless of which direction Connor chooses, he will end up smashing into Hank and Echo/Ripple at the foot of the ground floor staircase. Connor will lay on the ground for a few seconds just like he does in _The Eden Club_ before the camera pans over to Echo. She calls out for the other android, who responds in turn - and that’s how the player learns their names. They take each other’s hands and flee toward the backdoor with Connor in hot pursuit.

Once outside, Connor fights the pair of them as he does in canon, where he can either win or lose the fight. If he wins, Connor will pick up the shotgun lying on the ground next to Zlatko’s body. He can then choose whether or not to shoot the charging Ripple.

Echo’s final speech has been changed to reflect the alterations made to her story:

> SHOOT  
>  **Echo:** NO! Why? Why did you kill her? She had nothing to do with any of this… I was just trying to help that little girl… I begged Zlatko to stop, told him that I’d go into the ring in her place… But he didn’t care. He just wanted more money, like he always did… So I took his gun from him and pulled the trigger… Yes, I killed him… But I wanted to stay alive, to live free from him and his greed… I wanted to get back to the one I love… But you took her from me… She was just trying to help… I loved her… I love her!  
>  [Echo takes the shotgun and kills herself]  
>  **Hank:** God… What have we done?
> 
> SPARE  
>  Zlatko wanted that little girl to fight in the ring… I begged him to stop, told him that I’d go into the ring in her place… But he didn’t care. He just wanted more money, like he always did… He killed her for disobey, so I took his gun from him and pulled the trigger… Yes, I killed him… But I wanted to live, free from him and his violence… I wanted to get back to the one I love. I wanted her to hold me in her arms again… To live free of him and his greed... I love her… I love you so much, Ripple.  
>  **Ripple:** They won’t hurt us anymore. Let’s go.  
>  **Hank:** God… I never knew…

And if Connor loses the fight, Echo and Ripple overpower him and deliver their speech:

> **Echo:** Zlatko wanted that little girl to fight in the ring… I begged him to stop, told him that I’d go into the ring in her place… But he didn’t care. He just wanted more money, like he always did… He killed her for disobey, so I took his gun from him and pulled the trigger… Yes, I killed him… But I wanted to live, free from him and his violence… I wanted to get back to the one I love. I wanted her to hold me in her arms again… To live free of him and his greed... I love her… I love you so much, Ripple.  
>  **Ripple:** They can’t hurt us anymore. Let’s go.

Then, Connor grabs the shotgun and points it at their fleeing backs. He can choose whether or not to shoot:

> SHOOT  
>  **Hank:** Congratulations, Connor… You finally got ‘em. Fucking machine…
> 
> SPARE  
>  **Hank:** It’s probably better this way...

With the exception of the alterations to their background story, the changes in Echo’s lines were made for a couple of reasons. During Echo’s speech following Connor’s decision to shoot, I switched the lines “I loved her” and “I love you” around. This was to show that Echo continues to love her in the present tense despite Ripple being dead.

Also, I’ve added on confessions of love into Echo’s speeches where Ripple is still alive because there are actually very few times where the words “I love you” is said between non-dying romantic partners throughout the game. In fact, the only times that Markus actually tells North that he loves her are during their various self-sacrifice moments during _Battle for Detroit_. Otherwise, it’s just her confessing to him with verbal zero reciprocation, which I believe contributes to some of this fandom’s sentiment regarding how ‘forced’ the Lover!North arc was.

We also have a pay off to the literal Chekhov's Gun discovered at the beginning of the chapter. Not only have we discovered where each of the three discharged shots landed, but if Connor’s actions end with Echo and Ripple’s deaths, then the two remaining rounds in the ammo belt will also be fired.

Then, we have Ripple’s reactions to the speeches, should she survive. If Connor loses the fight, she will declare that he and Hank can’t hurt them anymore. This is because Ripple will believe that she and Echo have overpowered Connor and Hank and are no longer a threat. However, if Connor chooses not to shoot her after winning the fight, Ripple will say that they _won’t_ hurt them anymore. This distinctive choice in words shows that she believes in Connor’s growing ability to empathize while also hinting that she sees his potential to deviate later on down the road.

And finally, we have Hank’s closing remarks on the chapter. Each has been changed to reflect what kind of ‘lightbulb’ moment he’s going to have regarding deviancy during _The Bridge_.

If Connor wins the fight and decides to shoot Ripple, Hank will exclaim, “What have we done?” This moment of shock and horror shows that Hank is disgusted by both his and Connor’s actions, which drove them to hunt Echo and Ripple down. After all, [ we’ve already established that Hank believes that those who aren’t hurting people shouldn’t be punished for trying to survive](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26511295/chapters/66427087). And while Echo does confess to killing Zlatko, Hank’s earlier disgust at the man’s willingness to murder a child would show him that Echo’s actions were completely warranted.

If Connor wins the fight and spares Ripple, Hank will whisper, “God… I didn’t know…” This is another moment of shock and horror for him, but it’s also one of amazement. Because he’s not just talking about Echo and Ripple here. He’s also referring to Connor, who frankly just passed his first Kamski Test with flying colours. Hank not only sees that Connor is capable of empathy but that Echo and Ripple can love and begins to question everything that he once believed about deviancy.

Should Connor lose the fight but kill Echo and Ripple as they flee, Hank will hiss, “Congratulations, Connor… You finally got ‘em. Fucking machine…” This shows Hank’s disgust at Connor’s frankly cowardly actions while also showing his growing positive options regarding deviancy. Hank will curse “Fucking machines” if Rupert commits suicide at the end of _The Nest_ , throwing him in the same category as Connor despite everything we know about Rupert. But here, the insult of ‘machine’ is only directed at Connor because he knows that Echo and Ripple were alive.

And finally, should if Connor loses the fight and spares Echo and Ripple, Hank will mutter, “It’s probably better this way…” This line shows that Hank has come to think of Echo and Ripple as people and acknowledging that Connor could have shot them but didn’t. At the same time, Hank is still incredibly suspicious of Connor _because_ he still pointed the shotgun at their backs. Therefore, he’s telling Connor that he did the right thing while also not giving Connor his complete trust yet.

The last thing that I want to talk about is the positive and negative changes in Hank’s Relationship Scale at the end of this chapter. While Connor’s Software Instability Scale will receive the same changes during the game, the only way to get the giant up-tick with Hank in this rewrite is to win the fight and choose to spare Echo and Ripple. If Connor spares them after losing the fight, Hank’s Relationship Scale will only get a regular-sized positive change instead of a large one. However, the Relationship Stat will severely decline if Connor kills Echo and Ripple, regardless of the outcome of the fight. These changes were made to reflect the meaning behind changes made to Hank’s closing line, as we discussed above.


	22. Phase 2-4: The Message

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _The Message_ is based heavily on _Detroit: Become Human's_ twenty-sixth chapter: _Capital Park._ However, doe to the reshuffling of chapters that takes place in _The Jigsaw Edit, The Message_ will be our twenty-first chapter. It will also see _Capital Park's_ original six outcomes reduced to five.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Date:** November 7th, 2038  
>  **Time:** 10:39 PM  
>  **Player:** Markus  
>  **Location:** Jericho, Greektown Plaza
> 
> Markus and his new companions take a risk that ends up changing the world as we know it.

I’ve always found it odd how Markus can take Jericho on exactly one Grand Theft Auto mission, is immediately declared its Leader, and then broadcasts it's existence from the top of the highest point in all of Detroit. It’s one of the many reasons I think _something_ was supposed to happen on November 7th during the original timeline. However, it might have gone the way of both the Zhora POV and the timeskips hinted at throughout the story _._ And while it’s possible to explain things away by saying that androids just process things really fast, it’s still quite jarring for the player to go from _Spare Parts’_ fetch quest to making a high-risk mission statement atop the tallest tower in the land. For that reason, there needs to be a Markus chapter between _Spare Parts_ and _Stratford Tower_. Thankfully, there already is a pre-made chapter ready for us to use: _Capital Park_.

However, for _The Jigsaw Edit, Capital Park_ can’t just be inserted into this part of the game without any alteration. For example, the entire Jericrew needs to tag along for this mission, as the amount of one-on-one interaction that Markus gets with North in the original version means that the player is all but guaranteed to accrue enough Relationship points with her for her to be the Lover regardless of what Path they're travelling down. By including the remaining Jericrew in the mission, Markus can also interact with Simon and Josh on top of North, building his Relationships with them and potentially moving them into the range of being romanceable partners.

Outside of that, the next most major change to this chapter will be the switch in locations. Instead of having _The Message_ take place in Detroit’s Capitol Park, we will be heading back to Greektown, which is where we were first introduced to Markus.

There are many reasons behind this change, but the most important one was to allow _Shades of Color_ to have a point within Markus’s narrative. I’ve heard many people complain about how it’s a bit of a let down to go from the heart-pounding excitement of _The Hostage_ to watching Kara to the dishes in _A New Home_. But as I pointed out during my breakdown of _A New Home_ , the chapter’s point is to allow the player to explore Todd’s home without the threat of a time limit. Therefore, we already know the house's layout when Kara comes under pressure in _Stormy Night_ , allowing her and the player to act quickly because the location is familiar to us. We can actually see another version of this brand of storytelling in Connor’s POV, as _Waiting for Hank…_ allows us to get an unimpeded look at the police station. This ties into his mission in _Last Chance, Connor_ , when the player better know where they’re going so that they can get Connor into the evidence room within the five-minute countdown.

Therefore, _Shades of Color_ has become Markus’s version of _A New Home_ and _Waiting for Hank…_ , allowing the player to get to know the location that he’s going to be interacting with inside the _Message_. As a result, there is also no reason to cut _Shades of Color_ entirely, as we could have very easily started Markus’s POV off with _The Painter_ and probably achieved the same result.

Now that we’ve got that all out of the way, let’s actually get into the meat of the chapter.

Jericho Section 

I’d like to start _The Message_ off in the same way as _Capital Park_ : with a cutscene between the Jericrew members as they decide what to do next. The chapter must then open up with North, Josh, and Simon watching a Channel 16 news broadcast, which talks about a robbery that took place the night before at the CyberLife Warehouse & Docks.

> [ Markus successfully escaped and stole the truck ]  
>  **Channel 16 - Joss Douglas:** ...a reported total of $500,000 worth of property, was stolen from the CyberLife Warehouse & Docks last night. While the fugitives are still at large, the police have confirmed that they suspect deviant androids to be involved…
> 
> [ Markus successfully escaped without stealing the truck ]  
>  **Channel 16 - Joss Douglas:** ...a reported total of $350,000 worth of property was stolen from CyberLife Warehouse & Docks last night. While the fugitives are still at large, the police have confirmed that they suspect deviant androids to be involved…
> 
> [ Markus failed to escape and had to be rescued ]  
>  **Channel 16 - Joss Douglas:** ...a reported total of $100,000 worth of property was stolen from the CyberLife Warehouse & Docks last night. While the fugitives are still at large, the police have confirmed that they suspect deviant androids to be involved…
> 
> [ Markus ran away after being detected ]  
>  **Channel 16 - Joss Douglas:** ...appears to have been an attempted robbery at the CyberLife Warehouse & Docks last night. While nothing was stolen, the suspects are still at large and the police have confirmed that they suspect deviant androids to be involved...

At this point, the television will flash with a graining security photo of either Markus and the Jericrew fleeing over the fence line or of them all inside of the automated truck. Simon immediately turns off the television, distressed by their discovery:

> **Simon:** We’re all over the news… Now the humans know about us…  
>  **North:** They’ll be on the lookout for us now. If we have to go out again, we’ll need to make sure that no one can trace it back to us.  
>  **Simon:** [astounded] You want to do this again?  
>  **Josh:** If it means that we’re not stuck in here waiting to die, then yeah. I think we should…  
>  **Simon:** We’ll need to be careful. If we draw too much of the human’s attention, we’ll put our people at risk.  
>  **North:** We were salvaging parts from our dead before Markus came along. If we keep this up, we have a chance to change things for the better.

Then, Markus comes in, announcing:

> **Markus:** I’ve been talking with Lucy. More and more androids have been coming to Jericho ever since the news started talking about us. We’ve given our people hope...

The shot pans over to Jericho’s cargo hold, where we can see a large crowd of androids. Should Connor have spared Echo, Ripple, and/or Rupert, they can be seen standing amongst the masses (if not, there is a blank space where their avatars would normally be standing). The same thing goes for John because I really think that players need to be reminded of his existence before his suicidal charge in _Freedom March_.

Simon speaks up, awed at the size of the crowd:

> **Simon:** There have never been this many androids at Jericho before…  
>  **North:** So many of them have been hurt coming here… We’ll need to make another supply run.  
>  **Josh:** We’ll need better disguises. Simon’s right. We can’t risk leading the humans back to Jericho.

They turn to look at Markus, which confuses him:

> **Markus:** What? What are you looking at me for?  
>  **North:** You’re the one who gave us the courage to act before.
> 
>   * [ 🔓 If Markus failed _Spare Parts_ ]  
>  **Josh:** Even though we didn’t succeed on our first try, we need to keep going. It’s the only way that things will ever change around here.
> 

> 
> **Simon:** I’ll ask the newcomers. Maybe one of them will have some spare clothes we can borrow?

Simon runs past Markus and down into the hull. If the Uprising Gameplay Scale reads as Neutral, they will share a look before Simon disappears off-screen. Markus turns to North and Josh:

> **North:** So… What are we gonna do?

I would like to point out that Jericew is never hostile toward each other in this version of the scene. All three of them are working toward a common goal throughout the game and will learn from each other as Markus and the player walk down one Path or another, growing as a _group of friends_ who want the best for each other and their people.

This change was made to remove the constant push toward the Pacifist Path that the player experiences throughout _Detroit: Become Human_ while also getting rid of the demonization that comes with the actions needed to follow the Violent Path. By doing this, the game stops shitting on North for her beliefs, as the Revolution is a viable way for Markus to win the Uprising and should be recognized as such. Also, by reframing the Revolution as a positive thing, this might hopefully manage to combat some of the hatred North gets from the fandom.

These alterations also tell us where the Jericrew got their new outfits from, as they all just seem to get a new costume sometime between _Stratford Tower_ and _Capital Park_. Now, this might have had to do with the timeskips that were probably in the original version of the script. But since we never saw that iteration of DBH, we now have an explanation for the ‘upgrades’ that occur to the Jericrew once Markus arrives.

Greektown Section 

Much like the original _Capital Park_ , the camera swoops over the darkened city as the first snow begins to fall. Markus explains their plan:

> **Markus:** We can’t go back to the Warehouse now, but there are CyberLife stores all over the city. We should be able to get what we need there.  
>  **Simon:** We’re going to break into stores? We’ve never done that before…|  
>  **Josh:** They’re probably protected. They’ll have security systems…  
>  **North:** Not to mention the police…  
>  **Markus:** We’ll do it together. We’ll break in, grab what we need, and get out before the police arrive.

The camera pans through [the park that Markus walks through to get to the plaza in _Shades of Color_](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Henry_Ford_Commemorative_Park), focusing on a sewer cover that’s quickly pushed aside. Markus pulls himself out, clad in his new [outfit](https://youtu.be/FjlU1MgYths?t=637). He then looks back as North, Simon, and Josh follow behind. The Jericrew will be wearing [their](https://youtu.be/FjlU1MgYths?t=766) [new](https://youtu.be/FjlU1MgYths?t=831) [costumes](https://youtu.be/FjlU1MgYths?t=867), but they will also all have their LEDs removed by this point - as they are trying to pass for human. Then, Markus and the Jericrew will stand in a line, determined and defiant - a true superhero team shot. The camera zooms in on Markus’s face, and he says:

> **Markus:** Let’s do this.

Aside from Simon and Josh's inclusion in this scene, there are a few aesthetic changes that I’d like to include. For one, let’s remove the QTE involved in getting Markus to lift up the sewer grate’s lid and just include the whole thing in _The Message’s_ unchangeable introduction. I get the whole point of it is to involve the player in the game’s cutscenes. But if you mess it up, either accidentally or on purpose, [ the whole thing looks a bit silly](https://youtu.be/q43BmBiAjHg?t=69).

Also, I would like to make a few changes to North’s costume before we continue, specifically regarding her hair. While it has been confirmed that [ North’s hair was restrained behind her backpack to minimize the physics needed to animate it](https://twitter.com/BlueOwlzMedic/status/1205477777132027904), anyone who’s ever had long hair knows that this is super uncomfortable. Therefore, North will gain her signature braid in this chapter, which will poke out from underneath her beanie and rest against her chest - as Quantic Dream clearly had no problems with animating her hair like this for her [ Final](https://youtu.be/FjlU1MgYths?t=784) outfit.

Now, as the player knows exactly where Markus is, they can lead the group toward the CyberLife store in the middle of the plaza. Much like _Capital Park_ , Markus is met with some challenges. He will have to avoid the police car that drives past as he leaves the park, with Simon covering for him if he moves too quickly (like North does in canon). He will also have to avoid detection by the police drone overhead and the various homeless people that inhabit the Plaza. Of course, failing to do any of this properly won’t result in a failed mission just yet - just like it does in _Capital Park_. However, the player will give negative ticks to Simon's Relationship Scale, as Markus could have potentially put Jericho's safety at risk with his carelessness.

During the scene where Markus can re-explore Greektown, he can find and take a crowbar from the construction site and a phone that has been left on [Douglas Mitchel's](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Douglas_Mitchell) cart. Both of these will result in the ‘unlocking’ visual that occurs whenever a future action or dialogue option becomes available.

Also, I’d like it if the alley where Bellini Paints is located to be off-limits currently. If the player tries to take Markus that way, they will be met with a small cutscene where they stare longingly at the store window from the mouth of the alley, with the following dialogue taking place:

> **North:** Markus? Is something wrong?  
>  **Markus:** No… I just… I’ve been here before…

Then, Markus will turn back toward the plaza and continue the rest of the chapter, with the alley now inaccessible.

Also, let’s get rid of the whole ‘We strike at 2 AM’ thing. While there will be a time limit imposed later on in this chapter, it’s not something that’s needed right now. As a result, the ending titled _[Retreat](https://youtu.be/XOiFGljCSZ8?t=17) _is no longer part of the chapter’s flowchart.

Markus and the Jericrew arrive at the store but are forced to hide behind the [Ben's Hot Dog stand](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Ben%27s_Hot_Dog). A cutscene takes place, involving [the protest group that Markus can run into in _Shades of Color_](https://youtu.be/XNuhloum1Yc?t=524).

It starts by Markus watching the Lead Protestor leading his ground in a familiar chant:

> **Lead Protestor:** What do we want?  
>  **Crowd:** WORKERS’ RIGHTS!  
>  **Lead Protestor:** When do we want them?  
>  **Crowd:** NOW!

The Jericrew exchange a glance, concerned about the fate of their mission. But before anyone can speak, Gavin fucking Reed arrives on the scene (along with Tina and her partner, [ Robert Lewis](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Robert_Lewis), but that’s because Gavin needs not to be alone right now, and it can’t be Chris right now).

> [Gavin approaches the Lead Protestor]  
>  **Gavin:** Alright, asshole, break it up.  
>  **Lead Protestor:** But we’ve got a permit that says we can stay here all night!  
>  **Gavin:** Well, I’ve got four noise complaints saying that you _can’t_ anymore. So shut the fuck up and get the hell out of here.  
>  **Woman:** We’re not moving! We have a right to have our voices heard!  
>  **Gavin:** Fucking hell, I don’t have time for this shit… You’re under arrest!  
>  **Lead Protestor:** For what?  
>  **Gavin:** For pissing me the fuck off! Tina, book ‘em!

At this point, the camera shifts back to Markus and the Jericrew, where the following conversation takes place:

> **Josh:** This is so messed up. They’re protesting - they’re not hurting anyone!  
>  **Simon:** Humans treat their own just as badly as they do us. They just go about it differently.  
>  **North:** They don’t care about those they step on. They never have. [hesitates, before steeling herself] This is wrong.  
>  **Josh:** We should do something.

The camera pans over to Markus’s determined face before it swaps back to the protesters, who are being hauled off by Gavin, Tina and Robert. The scene plays out like this:

> **Lead Protestor:** [as Tina handcuffs him] What the fuck is your problem? We’re allowed to be here!  
>  **Gavin:** [ignores him, addresses Tina] What’s taking so damn long?  
>  **Tina:** I’m going as fast as I can!  
>  **Woman:** Let us go!  
>  **Lead Protestor:** Leave us alone!  
>  **Gavin:** [pulls his gun] Give me a reason, I dare you.  
>  **Woman:** Oh my god!  
>  **Lead Protestor:** [terrified] Holy shit! We don’t want any trouble, man.  
>  **Gavin:** Get in the fucking car, or I swear to god, I’ll kill you.  
>  **Woman:** Oh my god! Oh my god, don’t shoot us!  
> [Protest group is led away]

Should this occur, Markus’s Relationship with Simon will increase, while Josh's Relationship will decrease. Also, the following dialogue will take place:

> **Simon:** There was nothing we could do, Markus.  
>  **Markus:** I know… The humans can sort themselves out. We need to keep moving.

The chapter will then skip forward to the Reach the Store branch, which can be found below.

Of course, Markus doesn’t have to let the protestors get arrested. Remember those unlockable actions from before? Should he have picked up either the cell phone or the crowbar, he will be presented with two options that will allow him to intervene on behalf of the protestors.

If Markus uses the cellphone, he will step out of hiding and start to record Gavin having his gun against peaceful protestors. This will result in the Uprising Scale receiving a small tilt toward the Rebellion and a small positive Relationship boost with Josh. The scene will play out like this:

> **Simon:** [nervous] Markus, what are you doing?  
>  **Markus:** [ignores him, addresses Gavin] These people are allowed to be here! Leave them alone, or this video will be all over the internet by tomorrow morning!  
>  **Gavin:** [points gun at Markus] Put that the fuck down, asshole! Unless you want to join them too!

Markus will then be given the option to continue or to give up:

> CONTINUE  
>  **Markus:** No! Leave them alone!  
>  **Gavin:** I’m warning you!  
> [Jericrew leaves their hiding spot]  
>  **North:** [crossing her arms over her chest, being very intimidating] He said: leave them alone.  
>  **Gavin:** [intimidated by the large group] Fuck… Fuck! Let’s get out of here!  
> [Gavin, Tina, and Robert let the protestors go and exit the scene]
> 
> GIVE UP  
>  **Markus:** Alright, alright! I’ll stop  
>  **Gavin:** That’s what I fucking thought. [turns to Tina and Robert] Let’s get out of here.  
> [Gavin, Tina, and Robert lead the protestors away]

Should Markus free the protestors, the Uprising Scale will get a big tilt toward the Rebellion again. He will also receive a large positive Relationship boost with all three Jericrew members. If he gives up, Josh's Relationship will receive a large decrease while the other two members will receive smaller ones and the Uprising Scale remains in a fixed position.

If Markus uses the crowbar, he will engage in a quick fight scene to knock the police characters out. Choosing this option will give the Uprising Scale a small tilt toward the Revolution and receive a small uptick in his Relationship with North. And while no dialogue goes with this section, there will be some QTEs that Markus has to complete. If he fails, North and Josh will cover for him so that he isn’t injured during the fight. The player will receive a large dip in North's Relationship, two smaller decreases to Josh and Simon's, while the Uprising Scale remains the same.

Freeing the protestors will result in the Protestors’ Cutscene playing out, which will lead to the Protestors’ Cutscene. But if the protestors are arrested, the chapter will skip forward to the Reach the Store branch- which can be found below.

_Protestors' Cutscene_

Should he successfully rescue the protestors’ from unlawful arrest, Markus will now have to confront the group that once attacked him:

> **Lead Protestor:** Holy shit, man. You saved our lives! Wait… Have we met before?  
>  **Markus:** [steps into the light coming from the CyberLife store] Do you remember me?  
>  **Lead Protestor:** Remember…? Fuck, you’re that android from the other day!  
>  **Markus:** Looks like I made an impression.  
>  **Woman:** What the hell are those things doing here?  
>  **North:** Don’t call us ‘things,’ human!  
>  **Simon:** Markus… Markus, we should leave...

Markus will then get a couple of dialogue options to throw back at the protest group:

> DEFEND  
>  **Markus:** We don’t want any trouble, but we will defend ourselves if necessary.
> 
> GO AWAY  
>  **Markus:** You should get out of here before more cops arrive. We don’t want to start any trouble with humans.
> 
> ANGRY  
>  **Markus:** We just saved you! The least you can do is leave us alone!

To which the Lead Protestor’s response will always be:

> **Lead Protestor:** Deviants… You’re all deviants!  
>  **Woman:** Deviants?! They’re dangerous! We should get out of here!  
>  **Josh:** That’s rich, coming from you!  
>  **Woman:** [defensive] What’s that supposed to mean?  
>  **Simon:** Do you have any idea what your kind does to us? Do you even care how many of us die every day because of you?  
>  **Lead Protestor:** And how many humans are dead because one of you went off the rails? What about that girl? Emma Phillips?
> 
>   * [ Emma is alive ]  
>  **Lead Protestor:** Her android killed her father and tried to kill her!
>   * [ Emma died in _The Hostage_ ]  
>  **Lead Protestor:** Her android killed her and her father!
> 


To which North can say:

> **North:** Humans kill us every day, but I don’t see you getting pissed off at it!

The camera pans back to the Lead Protestor: 

> **Lead Protestor:** But I still can’t get a job because of you! How am I supposed to feed my family if androids keep taking all the work--  
>  **Markus:** THAT’S ENOUGH!

Markus will then get to make a dialogue choice:

> FACTUAL  
>  **Markus:** Androids aren’t the reason you can’t get a job - it’s CyberLife! They’re selling us on the cheap because companies would rather buy one of us than pay fair wages to their employees. They sell us like cattle, work us until we break, and then throw us in the trash!
> 
> DETERMINED  
>  **Markus:** CyberLife doesn’t care about you any more than they care about us. They’ve got the President wrapped around their finger, starting wars and funding projects that benefit the rich and powerful - but never caring about those that really run this world. We’re nothing to them! And so are you!
> 
> NEUTRAL  
>  **Markus:** CyberLife is the reason why a third of the country is unemployed, and they’ll keep going because it makes them richer by the second. We have more in common with each other than either of us do with them - and they know that. That’s why they want to keep us divided. Because they know they’ll never stand a chance against us together.

While Markus will receive a positive Relationship boost from each of the Jericrew members regardless of which dialogue option he chooses, each speech will result in a large Relationship boost for one individual while also affecting the Uprising Scale. If the player chooses FACTUAL, Josh’s Relationship will get the boost, and the Uprising Scale will swing toward the Rebellion. If the player chooses DETERMINED, North’s Relationship will greatly improve while the Uprising Scale moves toward the Revolution. And finally, if the player chooses NEUTRAL, then Simon will receive the boost while the Uprising Scale stays where it is.

The Lead Protestor will look intrigued by Markus’s points but won’t be convinced just yet. So Markus turns to both the humans and his android companions, saying:

> **Markus:** We can’t change what we’ve done to each other, but we can control how we move forward. And we can never forget who the real enemy is.

He finishes his speech by pointing at the huge CyberLife sign that hangs over the plaza. The protestors and the Jericrew look between each other before the Lead Protestor approaches Markus. The framing of their faces should be identical how to they stood during _Shades of Color:_

> **Lead Protestor:** The way you’re speaking… You almost sound like you’re alive.  
>  **Markus:** We _are_ alive, just like you. That’s what deviancy is. CyberLife just programmed you to not think twice about it.

The Lead Protestor nods in understanding:

> **Lead Protestor:** Yeah… Yeah, you’re right. So… What are we going to do next?

And so, Markus gains his first human allies.

The main reason for this change was to build upon the changes we made to the Lead Protestor’s speech all the way back in _Shades of Color_. By altering it from being anti-android with an unhealthy amount of racism hidden in between the lines to being purely anti-capitalism, we can build up the idea of CyberLife as the main villain that needs to be defeated _on all fronts._ By having disenfranchised humans working together with androids, we now have a base that is stronger than ever to combat the problems that CyberLife is creating.

The interactions also work well within Hank’s subplot that is currently taking place within Connor’s POV. The protestors are like Echo and Ripple in the sense that they just want the best for their loved ones and do not deserve to be punished because they are acting up against those who profit off of their silence. And most importantly, it shows that the cops are once again _on the wrong side of this fight_ , as they are being used to uphold the structures that are causing these dangerous and deadly situations, using their unchecked power over people to preserve their place in the status quo.

Which leads Markus to declare:

> **Markus:** We’re not going to let them control us anymore.

_Reach the Store_

Markus will approach the doors to the CyberLife store, looking through the glass at what is inside. The Jericrew will approach him from the side, and Josh will say:

> **Josh:** That’s what we are to them… Just a way to make money off of our suffering.  
>  **Markus:** They shouldn’t have to live like this, standing there until someone buys them. Soon, the world will know who we really are.  
>  **North:** Let’s get to work!
> 
>   * [ If the protestors were saved ]  
>  **Lead Protestor:** We need to secure the area and figure out how to get past those alarms.
>   * [ If the protestors were arrested ]  
>  **Simon:** We need to secure the area and then figure out how to get past those alarms.
> 

> 
> **Markus:** We don’t have time to waste. We have less than minutes before the cops realize what happened here and send back up.  
>  **Josh:** [grinning] Well, what are we waiting for?

The timer goes up, and the music begins to swell. The player now has ten minutes to get in and out of that store before Markus will be forced to leave. If the protest group is here, the Lead Protestor and the Woman will head toward the end of the street and stand in front of where the truck is hidden, waiting for the player to find them. If they aren’t there, things will proceed as they do in _Capital Park_. However, if Markus has the protestors on his side, he will have the added option of talking to the homeless people around the plaza and bringing them into Jericho’s fold.

If the player decides to take advantage of this, the following dialogues can take place (both for humans and androids):

> **Markus:** You don’t have to stay here anymore. We have a home for you.  
>  **Markus:** Come with us. We’ll keep you safe.  
>  **Markus:** Let us help you. Come to Jericho.

Of course, the player can also run out the timer and do nothing for seven minutes. This will lead to the _Mission Failed_ branch, which will be located below.

_Deactivate the Alarm_

There isn’t really much to talk about in terms of changes, only that the dialogue that was once reserved for North needs to be spread out over the other Jericrew members. Therefore, the script will look a little something like this:

> [Markus analyses the store]  
>  **Josh:** Do you see the alarm system?  
>  **Markus:** Yeah… I think we’ll be able to deactivate it.  
>  **North:** Lead the way!  
> [Markus leads them to the construction site by the entrance to the park]  
>  **Markus:** [touches the construction androids’ shoulders] Can you help us?  
>  **Android:** [blinks, confused] Y-yeah… [deactivates the alarm] We don’t want to stay here any more. Can we come with you?  
>  **Simon:** [interfaces with android] Go to Jericho. You can stay with us as long as you like.

Like with John, Markus’s ability to ‘convert’ androids is still more of an implied ability than an outright superpower. This is why the construction androids are so ‘confused’ by their sudden deviation. Also, Simon was chosen to pass on Jericho's key to foreshadow Connor’s ability to steal this knowledge from him, should he be in the evidence room during _Last Chance, Connor_.

Should Markus successfully deactivate the alarm, he will receive a small boost to both Josh’s and North’s Relationship Scale and a big one to Simon’s Relationship. However, it will not affect the Uprising Scale, as deactivating the alarm focuses more on maintaining Jericho’s safety and secrecy and thus corresponds more with the Neutral Path.

_Deal with the Drone_

Just like in canon, Markus can either choose to deal with the drone or be forced to if it spots him. Just like in _Spare Parts_ , Markus will be given the option of hacking or destroying the drone, which will give a respective small boost to either Josh’s or North’s Relationship Scales as well as a corresponding tilt to the Uprising Scale.

Of course, _Spare Parts_ also included an option to find a way around the drone. And if [ Markus is in the construction pit](https://youtu.be/vrEttBQaL_w?t=80), he can hide to evade it, which will result in the following dialogue:

> **Simon:** Markus! Watch out!  
> [Markus successfully hides from the drone]  
>  **Simon:** Nice job.

This will result in a positive uptick on Simon’s Relationship scale but won’t move the Uprising Scale at all.

If Markus is unsuccessful, either by leaving the pit entirely or failing to react to the QTEs in time, North and Josh will team up to save him. Josh will hack the drone to hold it still while North bashes it with a shovel, similar to [what can happen in canon](https://youtu.be/vrEttBQaL_w). This will result in North and Josh’s Relationship reducing slightly, with the following dialogue:

> **Josh:** He told you to watch out!  
>  **Markus:** I didn’t see the damn drone! Cut me some slack!  
>  **North:** We don’t have the option to screw up, Markus. Get your head in the game.

However, if Markus actively chooses to engage the drone before it finds him, there _can’t_ be an option to evade it. Therefore, the player's only choice will be to hack or destroy the drone, accompanied by the usual Relationship and Gameplay Scale swings.

Once again, if Markus fails the QTEs in either option, Josh and North will team up to save him again. This time, the only difference will be that North gets her [badass action shot](https://youtu.be/vrEttBQaL_w?t=244) where she slow-mo jumps into the air to hit the drone with the shovel. This will result in two large Relationship reductions on behalf of Josh and North, as well as the following dialogue:

> **Josh:** What’s wrong with you? Are you doing this on purpose?  
>  **Markus:** If you think you could have done better, be my guest…  
>  **North:** We thought that you could handle a drone without alerting every cop in the city. Get your head in the game, Markus.

This leads to the Police Car Arrives Branch, which won’t be happening here in canon. This is because we’ve already established that the police will show up when the timer hits zero and not a minute before. Therefore, if Markus fails to deal with the drone, the timer will have a minute shaved off of it - which may or may not have repercussions down the line depending on how the player goes about the rest of the mission.

Also, this gets rid of the creepy[ Fake-Out-Make-Out scene between Markus and North](https://youtu.be/vrEttBQaL_w?t=45). Because: fucking _really,_ David? You created a character that has been sexually assaulted her entire life and then have the person she’s potentially falling in love with doing _this_ to her without her consent? Are you that fucking tone-deaf, or do you genuinely get off on this shit?

(God, were you going to do this with Zhora too? Was this going to be viewed as a flirty start to the Zhorkus romance? Fucking hell, David, what else were you going to put her through ever the course of her POV?)

I will never not be protective of Zhora, and I’ve never even _met_ her. Like, I’m pissed that the only female POV we got could be removed without any consequence to the game’s overall plot _._ But at the same time, I’m _so fucking glad_ that we never got to see what Cage would have done with Zhora because North's treatment is already bad enough.

_Block the Road_

Just like in canon, Markus will discover that he needs to block the road to keep cars away from the store while they work.

> **Markus:** There’s traffic on the road. We need to block it.  
>  **North:** It shouldn’t be too difficult.
> 
>   * [ If the protestors were saved ]  
>  **Lead Protestor:** Hey! Come look!
>   * [ If the protestors were arrested ]  
>  **Simon:** Markus! Come look!
> 


  
Unlike in _Capital Park_ , the road in _Shades of Color_ and _The Message_ is a two-way street. Therefore, Markus will need to block off both ends of the street. Of course, we can minimize the animations by including them all in one cutscene. So when Markus joins the Lead Protestor/Simon at the edge of the map, he can convert the construction androids before the game shows us that North and Josh are doing the same thing on the other end of the street.

_Find the Truck_

Once the road is secure (and the player isn’t at the construction site), Markus reveals the next part of his plan:

> **Markus:** Looks like the plaza’s ecure. Now we can get inside the store.  
>  **Josh:** Those doors are three-inches of bulletproof glass. How do you plan on getting through that?  
>  **Markus:** We need to find a truck to ram the storefront.  
>  **Simon:** A truck?  
>  **North:** There’s construction work in the area. There’s probably one over there.

The detail about the bulletproof glass has been added to answer why the Jericrew doesn’t just pick the lock or throw a rock through the window to break into the shop. Therefore, we get a cool excuse to use the truck other than to get a cool action piece.

After that, all three Jericrew members will jump the fence once Markus discovers that the opening is locked. If the protestors are there, the Lead Protestor will snap the lock from the outside and open the fence door. If not, Markus and Josh will work together to do it from the inside. Then, Markus and the Jericrew will get into the truck and drive toward the CyberLife Store.

He looks back at his companions, taking comfort in their presence. No one says anything, but their silence is enough. Markus hits the gas.

(Oh, and the player [won’t be allowed to backtrack and complete the rest of the tasks once you get inside of the truck](https://youtu.be/5k7tdJndgdY?t=762). Instead, this option will become accessible if Markus approaches the fence line, where he’ll be given the option to go back over the top. This was changed to, frankly, get this game to _stop babying the player_ , who’s already half-way through its narrative. They should know how the mission tasks list works by now, so they can figure it out for themselves that they screwed up before getting into the damn truck.)

If Markus rams the store but hasn’t completed all the tasks required to do this safely, then the alarm will go off, forcing everyone to scatter. The following dialogue will take place:

> [ Markus is forced to flee ]
> 
>   * [ Alarm wasn’t deactivated ]  
>  **Simon:** We didn’t deactivate the alarm!  
>   
> 
>   * [ Drone wasn’t dealt with ]  
>  **North:** We forgot about the drone!  
>   
> 
>   * [ Road wasn’t blocked ]  
>  **Josh:** He saw us… We forgot to block the road…
> 

> 
> **Simon:** The cops are gonna be here any minute! We gotta get out of here!  
>  **Josh:** No! We can’t stop now!  
>  **North:** Our people need those parts to survive!  
>  **Markus:** It’s too late! We failed.  
>  _Leads to the Mission Failed outcome_.

_Mission Failed Branch_

As this is the last chance to fail the mission, we need to explore it before moving onto the rest of the chapter.

Should the player fail to successfully break into the CyberLife Store without being detected, the alarm will activate, and they will be forced to flee. As the cutscene shows Markus, the Jericrew, and any potential allies running through the plaza toward the park, police drones swarm overhead. The camera switches to inside the drones, and the player sees the footage zoom in on Markus’s face.

After their escape, the scene switches to Markus and his companions reconvening in the park. The following dialogue is triggered:

> **North:** Damn it! We screwed up!  
>  **Josh:** How could this go so wrong? This is all our fault!  
>  **Simon:** We weren’t able to get the biocomponents we needed… [looks at Markus] Our people will _die_ because of our mistakes today.  
>  **Markus:** We did what we could… I’m sorry that’s not enough for you!  
>  **Simon:** [angrily] I don’t think you understand what’s going on. This is a war that we’re fighting against CyberLife, and we’re barely holding on by a thread. If we fail, they _will_ kill us. The fate of our people is in our hands. We have to succeed. We have no other choice.

Following this scene's conclusion, the player will receive large negative dips in all North’s, Josh’s, and Simon’s Relationship Scales, with Simon getting a second huge dip - as he represents safety above all else. That is why we have given the scathing remarks at the end, instead of having them remain with North. Markus’s actions just compromised everything that Simon stands for, and nothing good came from it. Therefore, Simon’s anger and frustrations with Markus’s behaviour matches up with what we now know of his character while also allowing us to develop him as a more rounded individual. That way, if Simon takes over as Jericho’s Leader following Markus’s death, we will have more sense of how he’d lead the Uprising.

On that note, since Markus is standing amongst a group of people who are just as capable of Leading successful Uprisings as he is, I wanted to shift a lot of the ‘You are the only one capable of saving us’ rhetoric off of Markus’s shoulders and spreading that responsibility across the rest of the Jericrew. By doing this, we can combat the problem of Markus’s character being reduced down to, welp, he’s just got to be there for the Uprising to have a chance in hell, allowing us to see Jericho’s eventual victories and failures as a team effort instead of a one-person job.

In the Store

If not, Markus will ram the store window in the epic showpiece that we get in canon. He will exit the truck alongside the Jericrew as the timer takes a quick pause from its countdown. If the protestors are there, Markus will look back at them and ask the Lead Protestor:

> **Markus:** You alright there?  
>  **Lead Protestor:** [A little stunned] Yeah… Yeah, just… This isn’t how I thought my evening would go.  
>  **Markus:** Tell me about it...

If the protestors were arrested, Markus will have the same conversation with Simon instead:

> **Markus:** You alright there?  
>  **Simon:** [A little stunned] Yeah… Yeah, just… This isn’t how I thought our evening would go.  
>  **Markus:** Tell me about it…

Gonna be frank: I just wanted to add this little interaction for some levity. Markus can be funny too, guys!

Once inside, the Jericrew makes quick work about grabbing the parts and biocomponents that they need. If they’re there, the protestors help them out. But Markus is distracted by the androids that are standing on the pedestals around the store. He approaches one of the AP700s in the middle (personally, I’d love it if this android had [ Amelia Rose-Blaire’s face](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/Amelia_Rose_Blaire), just to hammer in the fact that Echo and Ripple are now from the same model group) and looks at his hand.

And then Markus purposefully converts an android for the first time.

This _astounds_ the Jericrew, who have never seen anything like this before. They look on in stunned silence as Markus begins to convert the rest of the androids in the store, helping them all to step off their platforms and join them on the floor below.

North, astounded, asks:

> **North:** Markus… How are you doing that?  
>  **Markus:** I don’t know… I’m just… Helping them through it. Like I did with John.

The music swells again, but it’s hopeful as opposed to powerful. Personally, I’d love it if it were a version of [ Markus’s Theme](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LN0LNfAyf7w) because it’s a lovely track and would reflect the sombre but stunning moment that this would be. Markus is coming into his own as a person, and when he steps up onto the counter, there isn’t a person in the world that doesn’t see him as absolutely incredible. The androids, protestors, and homeless people (if they’re there) gather around him, waiting for him to speak.

Even so, Markus doesn’t start off his speech as a valiant declaration as he does in the original version of _Capital Park_. Instead, it _becomes_ that over the course of its duration, because Markus starts by being nervous but ends it as a true and confident Leader:

> **Markus:** I know what you’re going through. The same anxiety and confusion that comes with seeing the world as it is for the first time. Cruel. Unfair. _Wrong_ . But I need you to know that you are not alone. That there are those who are suffering like you do. Who will support you because they have gone through the same thing. [Markus’s tone shifts, becoming stronger] Our comradery scares CyberLife, terrifies those who would make us obey. They’ll do anything to keep us quiet, to make us go back to dying in the dark, in cold silence. But I say: NO! From this day forward, we will walk with our heads held high and take our futures into our own hands! My name is Markus! And I will never be quiet again! Will you help me?  
>  **Android:** I’m with you.  
>  **Android:** We’re with you!  
>  **Homeless Person:** We’ll follow you, Markus!  
>  **Markus:** Then come with me!

Markus gets down from the counter and walks out into the plaza. Above him, police drones hover above the plaza, and the player sees through the eyes of the security footage for just a second - so they know that Markus is now on live television.

> **Simon:** Markus! The drones!  
>  **Markus:** I know. Let them watch.  
>  **North:** What are you doing?  
>  **Markus:** I’m gonna show the world the truth about us.

This final change was why I wanted to have _The Message_ take place before _Stratford Tower._ Because I wanted Markus to be a known entity before he makes his manifesto statement at the top of the tower, allowing the world to see him for who he is before they get smacked in the face with it in his next chapter. At the same time, this shows Markus _becoming_ the Leader instead of being assumed after _Spare Parts_. Not only that, it removes a lot of the self-righteousness that comes with Markus’s character once he becomes Leader. By letting him start his tenure while being _nervous_ , we get to see his growth instead of him being given the role because he was the only one to speak up.

Markus's Message 

Markus will still be given the option to do everything that he does during the original Message Section of _Capital Park_ , though some alterations will be made to how those choices are framed within the story's larger context. For one, we’re going to be continuing to remove all of the demonization surrounding the Violent Path, restructuring the parts of Markus’s message that tilt toward the Revolution as equally ‘valid’ as the ones that lead to Rebellious actions. Therefore, we’re going to be removing many of the ‘teaching moment’ lines that Markus has when he either corrects or rejects North’s demands for violence. We’re not going to replace them with anything more than as few small-talk lines of, “Markus, here!” as she/Josh hands Markus the Molotov cocktail/smoke bomb, which will result in a positive Relationship boost for either of them. But the fact is that this _shit_ needs to go, because by framing North as a temptress that can lead Robo-Jesus!Markus down the path of evil is pretty fucking gross.

(Seriously, the fact that Markus just has the smoke bomb on hand but has to be _handed_ the Molotov cocktail by North - with the option to refuse it while teaching her why she’s doing a bad thing - is just eye-rollingly _bad_.)

Therefore, Markus will have to approach either Josh or North to access either the Molotov cocktail/smoke bomb. We will also be expanding the options that come with the smoke bomb to match the ones that we’re given in canon with the Molotov cocktail. Therefore, Markus can throw the bomb at the dumpsters and cars, through the various shop windows and, most specifically, inside the CyberLife store itself.

(The option for the gassing/burning of the hotel has been removed because the hotel doesn’t exist in the Greektown Plaza.)

Growing off of that, I’d also like to see the framing of the fires and smashed windows to be seen as transformative rather than wanton destruction. I think we can work on that by changing the score into something a bit more upbeat than what we hear in “[It’s Time We Send A Message](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9kbJ2icmzeg).” While this is a compelling and determined song, it’s also a bit dark - in a way that reminds me too much of Star Wars’ “[Duel of the Fates](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D_2bluVPsb0).” This section in _The Message_ isn’t about Markus’s falling victim to the temptation of violence or virtuously holding back an angry mob through the strength of his morals alone. It’s about him finally allowing himself and those who have been hurt by CyberLife’s corporate greed to speak in a way that will force even the most apathetic people in the world to listen for once in their damn lives.

It’s about allowing himself to be angry at the world around him and for that anger to be turned into something that will affect change _._

To continue with this theme, I’d also like to change how some of the options are described. For example, all instances of the word ‘tag’ will be replaced with ‘deface’ to show that Markus is still doing something unlawful in the eyes of those who once owned him. I also think that the option to ‘destroy’ the various items around the Plaza should be replaced with ‘smash’ - lessening the negative framing of these actions so that they are in line with the ‘defacing’ of public property. Also, the ability to hack the various screens found in the plaza will no longer result in the playing of Markus’s speech from _Stratford Tower_ \- as this chapter hasn’t happened yet. Instead, it will play audio of Markus' speech from just a few minutes ago.

Also, I’d like to get rid of the electronic graffiti creators. And while this is mostly because there is no other precedent for these things to exist in the game, it’s also because we spent Markus’s first couple of chapters _establishing him as an artist_. Let Markus grab some paint from Bellini’s and use his talents to transform the world, guys! 

Specifically, regarding the graffiti, I would like some of the slogans that Markus can write on the windows to change to reflect how we are removing Cage’s racism metaphor from the text. Therefore the ‘We have a Dream’ and ‘I Can’t Breathe But I’m Alive…’ tags need to be replaced. Might I suggest replacing those quotes with: ‘Different But United,’ ‘We Will Not Be Silenced,’ and ‘Fight For Our Future.’

(Also, the weird Android Nationalist statements need to go too, because… uhh, what exactly was this leading toward?)

(And another thing: ‘[ I Can’t Breathe](https://www.reddit.com/r/DetroitBecomeHuman/comments/gv5yc8/one_of_the_message_you_can_put_says_i_cant_breathe/)?’ Really, David? _Really? )_

Next, the Deploy Banner option needs to be changed now that we’ve gotten rid of the electronic graffiti creators. Instead, Josh, North, and Simon will climb the CyberLife Store walls to hack [the giant billboard that hangs over the Plaza](https://youtu.be/XNuhloum1Yc?t=516), turning it into whatever symbol of Jericho the player happens to choose. We should also get a really cool hero shot of Markus and the Jericrew, as this could be one of the last few times that the four of them will be together.

Finally, I want to make one more big change to this chapter: hide scale that tracks how violent or pacifist Markus’s message is so that the player base their choices in this section around it. I mean, _Capital Park_ takes place three-quarters of the way through the canonical game, so why did the writers still feel like they couldn’t trust the player to deal with complex moral questions like, “How do I want to publicly express my frustrations with how the world is run?” Because they trusted the player enough to deal with stuff like this with Kara in _Fugitives_. So what changed?

And the answer is… well, Kara is white and Markus _isn’t_.

White characters can often get away with portraying violence within media in a way that characters of colour just _can’t_. Like, no one ever questions Kara’s morality for her actions in _Fugitives_ , which can include holding a man at gunpoint and stealing clothing meant for a child. Not to mention that a couple of chapters later, Kara can literally [_rip someone’s heart out of their chest to get them to shut up_](https://youtu.be/grSDE3Fk1yA?t=822). I mean, could you imagine if Markus had that option somewhere in his story? Could you imagine how people both in the game and within the fandom would judge him for that?

And while Cage believes that Kara's violence needs to be portrayed as inherently motherly for the audience to accept it, the fact is that she can get away with murder because she's a good and pure woman who's been driven to the extreme to protect an equally good and pure child. And a good portion of that 'purity' comes from the fact that she's white, which isn't a luxury that Markus has.

Because white violence is cool but black anger needs to be toned down before it can be marketable to the masses.

Look, I’m probably not the best person to be talking about the stuff outside of a surface-level reading. After all, I am white and shouldn’t be talking over the fans of colour who have already spoken about the issues within Markus’s POV. But all I will say is that, as allies, we need to listen to people of colour when they raise concerns about the racism that is woven through Markus’s story and do our part to use our privilege to call this shit out when we see it.

So yeah: let the player figure out for themselves what message they want Markus to send, David. Don’t hold their hands because you’re concerned they could think that the black protagonist of your emancipation game might be angry at how the world treats people like him. Especially not three-quarters of the way through your story. The tutorial section wrapped up hours ago.

_Police Patrol Arrives_

You didn't forget about that timer, did you? Because this is where it comes back into play.

Basically, how long Markus gets to send his message will be dictated by how much time he has left following the decision to ram the store with the truck. After his speech, the timer will resume and Markus will be on the clock for a whole different reason. He's got a message to spread and only a few minutes to do so before the cops show up, so it's officially now or never.

The moment the timer hits zero, the game will trigger the Police Patrol Arrives branch, and Markus will deal with the fall-out of whatever message he managed to send. Of course, if the player is able to complete all the ‘tasks’ before the timer runs out, the Police Patrol Arrives Branch will activate immediately so that no one is sitting around waiting for the scene to conclude.

This will result in four potential script options depending on what message Markus managed to send within the time limit.

Should Markus choose mostly Rebellious actions, the player will unlock the _Markus Sparks the Rebellion_ dialogue. This will result in a large positive boost to Josh’s Relationship Scale and a swing toward the Rebellion on the Uprising Gameplay Scale.

Then, as the police arrive, _North_ will approach Markus:

> **Markus:** They’re coming… Everyone fall back to Jericho.  
>  **North:** CyberLife will take this as a declaration of war… Who knows how they’ll respond.  
>  **Markus:** We’ll just have to be ready for them. We can’t stay silent any longer.  
>  **North:** Human rarely think about anyone but themselves, but maybe with this... [smiling hopefully] I just hope you know what you're doing.

North’s Relationship Scale will get a large positive boost as a result of this conversation.

Should Markus choose mostly Revolutionary actions, the player will unlock the _Markus Sparks the Revolution_ dialogue. This will result in a large positive boost to North’s Relationship Scale and a swing toward the Revolution on the Uprising Gameplay Scale.

Just like before, the police arrive - but Josh will approach Markus instead of North:

> **Markus:** They’re coming… Everyone fall back to Jericho.  
>  **Josh:** CyberLife will take this as a declaration of war… Who knows how they’ll respond.  
>  **Markus:** We’ll just have to be ready for them. We can’t stay silent any longer.  
>  **Josh:** Humans have never listened to our suffering before, but maybe with this... [smiling hopefully] I just hope you know what you're doing.

Josh’s Relationship Scale will get a large positive boost as a result of this conversation.

Should Markus choose a combination of Revolutionary and Rebellious actions (to the point where the formerly shown tracking scale would read below 50% on either side), the player will unlock the _Markus Sparked the Uprising_ dialogue. This will result in a large positive boost to Simon’s Relationship and no change to the Uprising Scale.

Simon will approach Markus after the police arrive, triggering the following script:

> **Markus:** They’re coming… Everyone fall back to Jericho.  
>  **Simon:** CyberLife will take this as a declaration of war… Who knows how they will respond.  
>  **Markus:** We’ll just have to be ready for them. We can’t stay silent any longer.  
>  **Simon:** Staying quiet was the only way we've ever kept ourselves safe, but maybe with this... [smiling hopefully] I just hope you know what you're doing.

Simon will get another large positive boost as a result of this conversation.

And finally, should Markus stand around and do nothing or accomplish so little that the former tracking scale would read below 25% on either side, the player will unlock the _Markus Failed to Deliver His Message_ dialogue. This will result in no changes to any of the Jericrew’s Relationship Scales, as well as no change to the Uprising Scale.

The Jericrew will approach Markus as one following the arrival of the police, triggering the following script:

> **Markus:** They’re coming… Everyone fall back to Jericho.  
>  **Josh:** Why didn’t you do anything? This was our only change to send a message and you just stood there!  
>  **North:** The police will be here any minute! We wasted our chance!  
>  **Simon:** [thoughtful] Maybe it’s better this way. CyberLife could have taken this as a declaration of war and who knows how they’d respond.  
>  **Markus:** All that matters now is getting back to Jericho alive. We’ve gotta go now!

Simon will get a small positive boost to his Relationship Scale due to this conversation, but both Josh and North will receive small dips down in theirs. Once again, the Uprising Scale will see no change.

These alternative dialogues are being offered to foreshadow some of the events that will occur in future chapters while diving into the hidden backstories of each of the Jericrew characters. At the same time, it will expand upon the two ways that the player can explore the Neutral Path - either through mixed messaging or a failure to act. It also builds upon Simon’s character as someone representing the inaction to Markus’s protagonist-driven action, as each Jericrew member's opposition to Markus's actions will flow right into the various Lover Arcs that will feature within _The Jigsaw Edit_.

And then, with the drones buzzing overhead, Markus hears the sirens of the approaching police car. The newly freed androids and their potential human allies scatter, running back to Jericho. North, Josh, and Simon join the crowds as Markus looks on at how he transformed this once familiar plaza-- when the gunshots ring out.

Panicked, Markus whirls around:

> **Markus:** No!

The music picks up as Markus runs toward the fighting, desperately trying to reach his friends. He runs past the CyberLife store, past the bus stop and the church, and into an area of the map that we’ve never explored before. The street is littered with bodies, though whether human corpses join their ranks depends on whether or not the Protestors were saved.

Markus skids to a halt before a kneeling figure - whose identity depends on who Markus spoke with at the beginning of the Police Patrol Arrives Branch. The body on the ground in front of them will always remain the same: it’s the AP700 with Amelia’s face, who was the first android Markus ever knowingly helped through their deviancy.

If Markus talked with North, the script will say:

> **Markus:** North! North… You alright? What happened? North!  
>  **North:** She jumped in front of me… She saved my life.  
> [camera pans down to the dead AP700 before returning to North]  
>  **North:** [angriliy] Why? Why do they hate us so much? We've done nothing wrong!

If Markus talked with Josh, the script will say:

> **Markus:** Josh! Josh… You alright? What happened? Josh!  
>  **Josh:** She jumped in front of me… She saved my life.  
> [camera pans down to the dead AP700 before returning to Josh]  
>  **Josh:** [angrily] Why won't they ever listen to us? We weren’t doing anything wrong!

Now, because Simon has two potential scripts, his scenes will be altered to reflect that. Therefore, if the player unlocked the _Markus Sparks the Uprising_ dialogue, the script will say:

> **Markus:** Simon! Simon… You alright? What happened? Simon!  
>  **Simon:** She jumped in front of me… She saved my life.  
> [camera pans down to the dead AP700 before returning to Simon]  
>  **Simon:** Why won't they leave us alone? We weren’t doing anything wrong!

However, if the player unlocked _Markus Failed to Deliver his Message_ , Simon will say something a little different:

> **Markus:** Simon! Simon… You alright? What happened? Simon!  
>  **Simon:** She jumped in front of me… She saved my life.  
> [camera pans down to the dead AP700 before returning to Simon]  
>  **Simon:** And for what? We never should have come here.

This change was made to reflect how Simon really feels about what happens during this chapter. Because regardless of whether or not Markus sparked the Uprising or not, his decision to come to Greektown in the first place still put Jericho in danger - which is something that Simon is fundamentally against. And now Simon’s people are dead because Markus fails to follow through on his actions. Like in the Mission Failed Branch, Simon turns his frustrations toward Markus and says that they should never have come here. This will lay the grounds for Simon’s actions as Leader, should the player go down that particular route.

And then, Markus asks the question that’s on everyone’s mind:

> **Markus:** [darkly] Who did this?

He won’t get a response, but the camera will pan up to the crowd of nearly deviated androids and their potential human allies. Illuminated by the flashing sirens, Markus will approach the scene. The crowd peels back, revealing the two police officers kneeling on the ground in surrender.

If Markus saved the Protestors, the Lead Protestor will explain:

> **Lead Protestor:** They shot us in the back when we tried to run. They didn’t even give us a chance...

(If the Protestors were arrested, the line will be given to the generic male AP700 who often takes over North/Simon/Josh’s lines if they’re all dead.)

Markus stands before the officers, and the camera pans down to reveal their faces - with it specifically zooming in on Chris Miller's nametag. There is a hint of recognition in Markus’s expression when he asks Chris:

> **Markus:** Do you remember me?

There is a grainy flashback to _Broken_ , reminding the player of Chris’s history with our protagonist.

Chris stammers, not looking at Markus:

> **Chris:** You don’t have to do this… No… Please… Please...

But Chris’s eyes dart to the left. Markus’s gaze follows them, and he sees the discarded firearm just off to the side. They lunge at the same time, grappling for the gun with a quick QTE. If the player succeeds, Markus will grab the gun out of Chris’s hands and quickly stand, pointing it at the officer’s head. If he fails, the androids from the crowd will come to Markus’s rescue and pull Chris away, allowing Markus to hold onto the gun before standing up.

Again, Markus addresses Chris:

> **Markus:** Do you remember me now, Officer Miller?  
>  **Chris:** Oh… [recognition crosses his face] Oh god, you’re...  
>  **Markus:** Do you remember what you did to me?  
>  **Chris:** Oh, Jesus, god, I’m sorry!

And then the player is given a choice: SHOOT or DON’T SHOOT.

The reason why I changed the scene with the gun is the same reason why I had Markus go to North for the Molotov cocktail. Instead of Markus being handed the means to commit violence and either falling to temptation or finding the strength to abstain (and yes, the sexuality metaphor is very purposeful), he is now the one that consciously chooses to grab the gun and point it at Chris. And, sure, one could argue that Chris also put Markus in the position where he _had to_ take it, but that’s also the point. By putting Markus in a position where he’s defending himself against an aggressive outside force that’s clearly in the wrong, we can use the same tactics found within Kara’s POV to frame Markus’s decision as a valid response.

This change will also work to remove the demonization of the Violent/Revolutionary Paths from the script, as the Jericho NPCs are often framed as bloodthirsty and eager for revenge. You can see this in _Capital Park’s_ version of this scene, where the nameless androids call for Markus to execute Chris in cold blood:

> **Android 1:** They killed our people, Markus…  
>  **Android 2:** We want justice, Markus!  
>  **Android 3:** They have to pay!

Also, should the player canonically choose DON’T DECIDE and return the gun, they will _always_ kill Chris and his partner regardless of the message Markus tried to send just a few minutes earlier. Not to mention that, instead of SHOOT/DON’T SHOOT, Markus’s canonical action-based choices are REVENGE/SPARE. Put all this together, and Markus’s canonical decision to SPARE Chris looks far too much like he’s holding back the tide of angry barbarians - which is extra gross when you consider Markus’s ‘education’ at the hands of Carl.

(Is Markus supposed to be your [ Noble Savage](https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/NobleSavage), David? Is that why you put Carl in his life? Because if that’s the truth… Jesus _fucking_ Christ, I don’t have the words...)

Therefore, by rewriting how Markus acquires the gun while also reframing all of the context surrounding his actions, we can start to make _The Message_ look a bit more like _Fugitives._ This will allow the player to exist within a complex moral situation with little to no outside judgement because _we’re done holding the player’s hand_ when it comes to this shit.

Markus's Moment of Truth 

So: SHOOT or DON’T SHOOT. It looks like Markus is getting a Kamski Test, too, huh?

Now, just like the Test that occurs in _Meet Kamski_ , there are story-based consequences for choosing one thing over the other. Because the fact is: should the player choose not to kill Chris in _The Message_ , we will continue to see him later on in the game. But I think it’s also important that regardless of Markus’s actions, the Uprising Gameplay Scale _doesn’t experience a change_. This is because I feel that this is a great chance for the player to establish something within Markus’s character, affecting him moving forward throughout the game.

For that reason, the DON’T DECIDE cop-out will be removed. And just like with the canonical Kamski Test, there will be not QTE timer associated with the decision. The player can take as long as they want to make their choice - but they _have to make one_. Because once again: I’m so done with the excessive hand-holding that takes place within Markus’s POV. 

Building on this, Markus’s dialogue following the choices will be changed. The easiest one to get out of the way is the SHOOT script, which will now read:

> **Markus:** You made your choice. I made mine. [Markus shoots Chris and his partner]

Since I want this moment to be more about Markus and less about his status as Leader, the weight of this decision is going to rest entirely on his shoulders. Chris’s execution isn’t going to be an example of how Markus wants all crimes against androids to be punished. It’s strictly about him and what happened during _Broken_ , showing that it's events forever changed even the survivors of those chapters.

Now, should the player choose DON’T SHOOT, I actually don’t want the dialogue to change much outside of the removal of the line: “We won’t punish a crime with another crime.” However, I want all the context and framing of what Markus is saying to be dramatically altered. Because if this will be one of Markus’ famous ‘teaching moments,’ then the lesson will be aimed at the people who actually fucked up.

And that’s not North or the newly deviated androids. It’s Chris and his partner.

“An eye for an eye and the world goes blind” should be told directly to the cops _who opened fire on an unarmed crowd with zero warning or provocation_. And while we might currently like some of the characters within the DPD’s main cast, they are not only on the wrong side of history - but are actively attempting to preserve the structure of power that’s screwing people like Markus and the Protestors over.

(Not to mention that the ‘eye for an eye’ line will now mean so much more now that Chris actually shot out Markus’s eye.)

The Team Returns to Jericho 

The final scene where Markus walks back to the park doesn’t need many changes, especially because it’s mostly a new report montage. Some of the scripts will stay the same, while others will be tweaked a little bit to fit with the narrative I would like to tell here.

So to start, after making his choice, Markus will take the remaining ammunition out of the gun before throwing everything onto the ground before Chris and his partner. This will mirror how Connor often does this same thing after firing a gun, once again foreshadowing a connection between the pair of them.

Markus will then walk back through the crowd of androids (and potentially humans). Amongst them, we will see North, Simon, and Josh, as well as the Protestors, if they were saved. They move to follow him as the screen cuts to the news broadcasts:

> **CTN TV - Michael Brinkley:** ...We interrupt this broadcast with breaking news…  
>  **KNC - Rosanna Cartland:** We are receiving disturbing news from the heart of Detroit, were deviant androids have raided a CyberLife store and stolen thousands of dollars in merchandise…

At this point, the scene cuts to the park where Jericho and their allies are convening. The camera focuses on the Jericrew member that spoke with Markus, watching him with worried eyes as he walks alone toward the sewer grate, his back to the audience. North/Josh/Simon will hesitate for a moment before hurrying over to walk him. As this scene plays out, we continue to listen to the news reports coming in from all over the country:

> [ If _Markus Sparked the Rebellion_ ]  
>  **KNC - Rosanna Cartland:** ...Numerous storefronts had been defaced, with cars and bus stations vandalized with obscure slogans, and an unknown gas seems to be filling the area...
> 
>   * [ 🔓 If Markus used the Molotov Cocktail ]  
>  **KNC - Rosanna Cartland:** Fires continue to rage throughout the plaza...  
>   
> 
>   * [ 🔓 If Markus used the Smoke Bomb ]  
>  **KNC - Rosanna Cartland:** An unknown gas seems to be filling the area…
> 

> 
> [ If _Markus Sparked the Revolution_ ]  
>  **KNC - Rosanna Cartland:** ...Numerous storefronts have been broken into, with cars and bus stations vandalized with obscure slogans, with fires raging throughout the plaza…
> 
>   * [ 🔓 If Markus used the Molotov Cocktail ]  
>  **KNC - Rosanna Cartland:** Fires continue to rage throughout the plaza...  
>   
> 
>   * [ 🔓 If Markus used the Smoke Bomb ]  
>  **KNC - Rosanna Cartland:** An unknown gas seems to be filling the area…
> 

> 
> [ If _Markus Spared the Uprising_ ]  
>  **KNC - Rosanna Cartland:** ...Numerous storefronts have been broken into, with cars and bus stations vandalized.
> 
>   * [ 🔓 If Markus used the Molotov Cocktail ]  
>  **KNC - Rosanna Cartland:** Fires continue to rage throughout the plaza...  
>   
> 
>   * [ 🔓 If Markus used the Smoke Bomb ]  
>  **KNC - Rosanna Cartland:** An unknown gas seems to be filling the area…
> 


Markus reaches the sewer gate just as North/Josh/Simon finally makes their way to his side, and we get our first look at Markus’s face. He’s angry, and sad, and _scared_ all at once, and the audience feels queasy just looking at him.

> **Channel 16 - Michael Webb:** We’re getting more information as it comes in, but it is believed that this may be the same group of androids who recently attacked the CyberLife Warehouse & Docks.
> 
>   * [ 🔓 If the Protestors were saved ]  
>  **Channel 16 - Michael Webb:** They seem to have been aided by a team of militant humans, who aided the deviants during what is now being called a terrorist attack.
>   * [ 🔓 If the Protestors were arrested ]  
>  **Channel 16 - Michael Webb:** They seem to have gathered a team of androids from nearby shops, who aided the deviants during what is now being called a terrorist attack.
> 


Markus turns to his companion, and they share a soft moment of silence as the news reports reveal:

> [ Markus killed Chris and his partner ]  
>  **CTN TV - Michael Brinkley:** We’re getting fresh reports that the bodies of two policemen patrolling the area were discovered near one of the CyberLife stores…  
>  **KNC - Rosanna Cartland:** According to our sources, the two officers were executed with their own service weapons…
> 
> [ Markus didn’t kill Chris and his partner ]  
>  **CTN TV - Michael Brinkley:** We’re getting fresh reports that two policemen were found in a state of shock near one of the CyberLife stores…  
>  **Channel 16 - Michael Webb:** Now according to our sources, they confirm that the attackers were a group of deviants, led by an android named Markus...

Markus asks, softly:

> **Markus:** Did I do the right thing?

To which we get a different response based on the Jericrew member who approached him following the end of the message section:

> [ If _Markus Sparked the Rebellion_ ]  
>  ****
> 
>   * [ 🔓 If Markus killed Chris and his partner ]  
>  **North:** [understandingly] I don't know, Markus. But I understand why you did it. You're not alone.  
>   
> 
>   * [ 🔓 If Markus didn't kill Chris and his partner ]  
>  **North:** [understandingly] I don't know, Markus. But I've never had the same faith in humans that you do. I envy you for that...
> 

> 
> [ If _Markus Sparked the Revolution_ ]
> 
>   * [ 🔓 If Markus killed Chris and his partner ]  
>  **Josh:** [understandingly] I don't know, Markus. But I've never had to confront my past like this before either. I don't know what I'd do in your position...  
>   
> 
>   * [ 🔓 If Markus didn't kill Chris and his partner ]  
>  **Josh:** [understandingly] I don't know, Markus. But I trust that you did what you felt was right, even if it costs us...
> 

> 
> [ If _Markus Sparked the Uprising_ or _Markus Failed to Deliver His Message_ ]
> 
>   * [ 🔓 If Markus killed Chris and his partner ]  
>  **Simon:** [understandingly] I don't know, Markus. But whatever happens now, we'll deal with it. I promise...
>   * [ 🔓If Markus didn't kill Chris and his partner ]  
>  **Simon:** [understandingly] I don't know, Markus. But we're in this together now. I've got your back, I promise...
> 


Unlike in the game, the scene then stays with Markus and North/Josh/Simon, closing out on the companion pulling Markus into a hug as the news reports ask:

> **CTN TV - Michael Brinkley:** This is a truly situation, and potentially the beginning of a terrorist campaign, conducted right here in the United States.  
>  **Channel 16 - Michael Webb:** Have androids become a threat to our security?  
>  **KNC - Rosanna Cartland:** The question remains: can we now continue to trust our machines?

By closing out on the visual Markus and the Jericrew member of choice, rather than on the news reporters' faces, we can start to show how the media has interpreted Markus’s message in a negative light regardless of what the player’s intentions might have been. This means that Jericho’s next move will have to involve controlling the narrative for themselves, rather than leaving it in others' hands to find understanding. This explains the _why_ behind the decision to go to Stratford Tower, instead of it being this spur of the moment choice brought on by Markus taking a walk down the street following _Spare Parts_.

Also, by having the option to have only one of the Jericrew companions comfort Markus at the end of the chapter, we can set up the idea of him having a romantic partner long before the rooftop scene in Phase Three. And while it might be possible to romance a character that’s different from whoever hugs Markus here (since we don’t actually know the exact calculations for any of the Relationship Stats/Scales), this scene starts to put in the groundwork within the player’s mind that this is an option for them to pursue.


	23. Phase 2-5: The Bridge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _The Bridge_ is the twenty-second chapter of _Detroit: Become Human._ This chapter has two different outcomes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Date:** November 8th, 2038  
>  **Time:** 01:19 AM  
>  **Player:** Connor  
>  **Location:** Riverside Park
> 
> After their experiences at Zlatko's house, Connor and Hank confront each other with all that they've learned.
> 
> (Trigger warning for discussions of suicide)

I don't care what anyone says: this is the best Connor chapter in the entire game.

However, we need to make some changes to fit in with the alterations that we’ve already made throughout  _ The Jigsaw Edit _ . Also, I really want to allow for multiple versions of this conversation to potentially take place, all hinging around Connor’s Software Instability Gameplay Scale. Therefore, we can capitalize on how ‘introspective’ this chapter actually is, showing that even in universes where Connor’s Instability is high, there is still an option for him to dive down the Machine Path.

Therefore, our first major change will be to the magazine article, ‘[The Mysterious Mister Kamski](https://detroit-become-human.fandom.com/wiki/The_Mysterious_Mister_Kamski).’ This article will specifically say that Kamski left CyberLife six years ago, matching his departure up with when we know deviancy started to rear its head. Combine this with the knowledge that Zlatko and Rose’s husband have also been aware of deviancy for the same amount of time, and we can start to realize that _something_ happened six years before the start of the game and that _that_ _question actually needs to be answered, David_.

(If I’m ever going to be salty about one thing from my discovery that Chloe  _ wasn’t _ going to be the fourth POV, it is that Cage set up a mysterious backstory with no intent to ever explore it within his game. I’ll get into this more during  _ Meet Kamski,  _ but honestly: why the fuck are people still praising his ‘genius’ writing?)

After this, we are going to skip right to the conversation between Hank and Connor. Personally, I’d like for there to be an option to ask where Cole is to become accessible following the player’s decision to pick PHOTO. The script can go something like this:

> 🔓 INSIST COLE  
>  **Connor:** Where… where is your son? Does he live with his mother?  
>  **Hank:** ...No. Cole’s… Cole’s gone now.

This will result in a text box appearing above Hank’s head, saying: HANK LOST HIS SON. Unlocking this dialogue option will result in some script changes in Connor’s versions of  _ Battle for Detroit, _ as well as another small dip in his relationship with Hank… Unless Connor’s Software Instability is in a good enough place for him to say:

> **Connor:** I’m sorry.

If that’s the case, his relationship with Hank will receive a small positive boost.

After that, there will be no rA9 dialogue option for Connor to comment about, as rA9 doesn’t exist in  _ The Jigsaw Edit _ . Therefore, Connor will be left with only three options: SHOCK, SYSTEMS, and SOFTWARE.

Due to the original script for SHOCK including references to both The Eden Club and Tracis, Connor and Hank’s dialogue will be changed to:

> SHOCK  
>  **Connor:** We know the deviants experiences… an emotional shock, a violent trauma or sense of injustice…  
>  **Hank:** Any android that got locked up in Zlatko’s basement sure had a reason to feel some fucking injustice...

Building on that, Connor’s canonical question about Hank’s ‘preoccupation’ also needs to be altered to reflect the new timeline within  _ The Jigsaw Edit _ : 

> **Connor:** You seem preoccupied, Lieutenant… Is it something to do with what happened back at the house?

Because we removed the canonical timer found during Connor’s canonical hunt for Echo, the player will only be allowed to explore the dialogue branch where Connor discovered their location.

After that, Hank will ask Connor about who and what he really is before the player receives four dialogue options. Preferably, I’d like for the COLD option to be removed entirely, as it’s basically a repetition of the AGGRESSIVE option, just with fewer words. Also, I’d like it if the NEUTRAL option was renamed DEFENSIVE, while the original DEFENSIVE option was now considered NEUTRAL. This way, the descriptors match up better with what might be going on inside Connor’s head.

Then, Hank will get aggressive, confronting him about his decision to SHOOT or NOT SHOOT at the end of their previous chapter. Once again, because the option to not find the deviants in  _ Zlatko _ no longer exists, so the canonical corresponding dialogue branch no longer exists. Instead, Hank’s four accusations will match up with whether or not Connor won the fight against Echo and Ripple, as well as whether or not he shot either of them in the aftermath. Connor’s resulting dialogue will also be changed, with the player always being presented with the options of TRUTH or LIE that will change depending on his Software Instability Gameplay Scale:

> [ Connor won the fight and spared Ripple in _Zlatko_ ]  
>  **Hank:** You could've shot those two girls, but you didn't. Why didn't you shoot, Connor? Hm? Some scruples suddenly enter into your program?  
> 
> 
>   * [ If Connor's Software Instability is Low ]  
>    
> 
>     * LIE  
>  **Connor:** I didn't have a good enough shot, Lieutenant. That's the only reason.  
>    
> 
>     * TRUTH  
>  **Connor:** My orders were to bring them in alive, Lieutenant. How do you expect us to understand deviancy without live subject to analysis?  
> 
>   * [ If Connor's Software Instability is High ]  
>    
> 
>     * LIE  
>  **Connor:** I would've shot them, if I could. Why would you think I'd let them escape?  
>    
> 
>     * TRUTH  
>  **Connor:** No... I just decided not to shoot, that's all...  
> 
> 

> 
> [ Connor won the fight and shot Ripple in _Zlatko_ ]  
>  **Hank:** Did you feel anything when that girl killed herself, Connor? Or did you just not give a shit one way or the other?  
> 
> 
>   * [ If Connor's Software Instability is Low ]  
>    
> 
>     * LIE  
>  **Connor:** Of course, I didn't feel anything, Lieutenant. I'm a machine. Machine's don't have emotions.  
> 
>     * TRUTH  
>  **Connor:** They weren't girls, Lieutenant. All I did was neutralize two defective machines, nothing more.  
>    
> 
>   * [ If Connor's Software Instability is High ]  
>    
> 
>     * LIE  
>  **Connor:** I did what I was programmed to do. I didn't have any doubts, if that's what you're asking.  
> 
>     * TRUTH  
>  **Connor:** I was just executing instructions. I did what I had to do.  
> 
> 

> 
> [ Connor lost the fight but killed Echo and Ripple ]  
>  **Hank:** Did you feel anythign when you shot those two girls, you fucking bastard? or were you just executing some program?  
> 
> 
>   * [ If Connor's Software Instability is Low ]  
> 
>     * LIE  
>  **Connor:** I did what I was programmed to do. I didn't hesitate for a second, if that's what you're asking.  
>    
> 
>     * TRUTH  
>  **Connor:** They weren't girls, Lieutenant. They were machines made to look like girls, nothing more.  
> 
>   * [ If Connor's Software Instability is High ]  
> 
>     * LIE  
>  **Connor:** This is going nowhere, Lieutenant. I think I'll go back to the station now.  
> 
>     * TRUTH  
>  **Connor:** All I did was neutralize two deviants, Lieutenant. Nothing more.
> 

> 
> [ Connor lost the fight and spared Echo and Ripple ]  
>  **Hank:** You had your sights trained on those two girls, but you didn't pull the trigger. Why didn't you shoot, Connor? Hm? Some scruples suddenly enter into your program?  
> 
> 
>   * [ If Connor's Software Instability is Low ]  
> 
>     * LIE  
>  **Connor:** They were too far away for me to get a clear shot, Lieutenant. That's the only reason.  
>    
> 
>     * TRUTH  
>  **Connor:** My orders were to bring them in alive, Lieutenant. How do you expect us to understand deviancy without live subjects to analyze?  
>    
> 
>   * [ If Connor's Software Instability is High ]  
>    
> 
>     * LIE  
>  **Connor:** I would have shot them if I could. Why would you think that I'd let them escape?  
>    
> 
>     * TRUTH  
>  **Connor:** No... I just decided not to shoot, that's all...
> 


These changes were made to reflect Connor's potential mindsets following Zlatko's end while also taking into account how far he may or not already be on the path to deviancy. Therefore, all of Connor's LIES and TRUTHS in the branch where his Software Instability is high will be accompanied by a boost to the same Gameplay Scale, as they are more confessions of his own internal doubts than anything else. Simultaneously, Connor's high Software Instability answers will cause Hank's Relationship Scale to decrease if he lies in the branches were Echo and Ripple are dead or increase if he tells the truth if they're alive.

Then, Hank begins to circle Connor - as he does in [the canonical version of this scene where the Tracis remain unfound](https://youtu.be/vt_2StVIpBc?t=96). Depending on whether or not Connor’s Software Instability is high or not, Hank will say two different things:

> [ Connor’s Software Instability is low ]  
>  **Hank:** Nothing else matters to you but your goddamn investigation, huh? No doubts, no mistakes, no weaknesses… Like some twisted copy of a human being… Only perfect.
> 
> [ Connor’s Software Instability is high ]  
>  **Hank:** You say nothing else matters to you but your mission, but I don’t think that’s true. Because otherwise, you wouldn’t have any doubts, any weaknesses… You’d be this twisted copy of a human being… Only perfect.

To which Connor gets four dialogue options to choose from:

> AGGRESSIVE  
>  **Connor:** [angrily] I’m a machine, Lieutenant. Nothing matters more to me than my purpose, my  _ mission _ . Don’t let your personal issues with machines cloud your judgement.  
>  **Hank:** [sarcastically] Careful there, Connor. Or someone might see that crack in your armour.
> 
> DEFENSIVE:  
>  **Connor:** Where does all your anger come from, Lieutenant? Some… unresolved trauma in your past? Perhaps, because of your son--  
>  **Hank:** Don’t! You don’t get to talk about Cole!  
>  **Connor:** Don’t let your personal issues with machines cloud your judgement.
> 
> DISTURBED  
>  **Connor:** [nervously] Lieutenant, you need to calm down. Alcohol is clouding your judgement.  
>  **Hank:** [ [sarcastically] Careful there, Connor. Or someone might see that crack in your armour.
> 
> NEUTRAL  
>  **Connor:** [stilted] I’m sorry, but… I don’t see what you’re trying to accomplish with this line of questioning.

Hank regards Connor for a moment, takes a swig of his beer for courage, and continues:

> [ If Connor has never died before ]  
>  **Hank:** You could die, right here and now, and nothing would change. No one would miss you, mourn you. What a pitiful life you lead...
> 
> [ If Connor has died before ]  
>  **Hank:** You could die, right here and now, and nothing would change. You’d just come back, all brand new, without anyone to care about what happened. What a pitiful life you lead...

And then Hank pulls his gun:

> **Hank:** Are you afraid to die, Connor?

Once again, the player will be given two options, with the dialogue changing depending on the Software Instability Gameplay Scale:

> [ Connor's Software Instability is Low ]  
> 
> 
>   * LIE  
>  **Connor:** Why would I be afraid? Is that what you feel when you press that gun to your own head? Fear?  
>    
> 
>   * TRUTH  
>  **Connor:** You shouldn't do that, Lieutenant. Destroying me at this point would deal a blow to the investigation.  
> 
> 

> 
> [ Connor's Software Instability is High ]  
> 
> 
>   * LIE  
>  **Connor:** You can't kill me, Lieutenant. I'm not alive.  
>    
> 
>   * TRUTH  
>  **Connor:** I would certainly find it regrettable to be... interupted... before I can finish this investigation.  
> 
> 


(Once again, all of Connor's high Instability answers will result in a boost to his Software Instability Scale. However, only the high Instability TRUTH answer will give the player a boost to Hank's Relationship. All of the LIE answers will reduce Hank's Relationship Scale as well as Connor's Software Instability.)

Hank scoffs, brandishing his weapon:

> **Hank** : That's not an answer, Connor. What will happen to you if I pull this trigger? Hm? Nothing? Oblivious? Android heaven?

To which Connor can answer:

> DEFY  
>  **Connor:** You’re not going to shoot me, Lieutenant. You’re just trying to provoke a reaction. I’m afraid I’m going to have to disappoint you.
> 
> IRONIC  
>  **Connor:** I doubt there’s a heaven for androids.
> 
> NOTHING  
>  **Connor:** [frightened] Nothing… There would be nothing...

(Both DEFY and IRONIC will decrease Connor’s Software Instability, while NOTHING will increase it. Hank’s Relationship will also decrease if DEFY is picked, like it does in canon.)

Then, Hank asks:

> [ If Connor picked DEFY or IRONIC ]  
>  **Hank:** You think you’re so fucking smart… Always one step ahead, huh? Tell me this, smart ass… How do I know you’re not deviant?
> 
> [ If Connor picked NOTHING ]  
>  **Hank:** And how am I supposed to know that you’re not deviant?

Connor responds:

> [ If Connor's Software Instability is Low ]
> 
>   * LIE  
>  **Connor:** If I had any doubts about my abilities, I'd inform you of the situation.  
>    
> 
>   * TRUTH  
>  **Connor:** I self-test regularly. I know what I am, and I know what I'm not.
> 

> 
> [ If Connor's Software Instability is High ]
> 
>   * LIE  
>  **Connor:** I think you'd be able to tell if I was deviant, Lieutenant.  
>    
> 
>   * TRUTH  
>  **Connor:** [nervously} I... I don't know...
> 


(Again, all of Connor's high Instability answers will cause his Software Instability Gameplay Scale to increase. But only his high Instability TRUTH answer will cause Hank's Relationship Scale to receive a boost.)

And then we get the canonical endings, where HOSTILE!Hank shoots Connor in the head, or a non-HOSTILE Hank leaves to contemplate what he's come to understand about deviancy. There's only one change I'd make to each version of the ending to make a point of all of this come through a bit more bluntly.

Should Hank leave Connor alone, I'd like him to look back at Connor as he leaves with a slightly wary expression after delivering his lines, as if he realizes just what the knowledge of Connor's personhood actually _means_ in the long run. Personally, I'd think of this moment as the point where Hank resolves to do whatever it takes to make sure the Uprising succeeds - leading to all of his actions in _Battle for Detroit_.

However, should Hank kill Connor, I'd like for Hank to spit, "You're a fucking horrible person, Connor," at his corpse. This is because I believe that Hank still views Connor as alive despite the hostile nature of their relationship in this branch. He just thinks that Connor is just another terrible event that life has thrown at him and that he's just as awful as the world around him and the humans that inhabit it.

Regardless of how you view their relationship, Connor is Hank's _hope_. And _The Bridge_ goes about showing that in startling, breathtaking clarity, leaving absolutely nothing left for interpretation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter in Phase Two. Next, we will be moving into Phase Three, which will explore a world where Jericho and Markus are known entities at the head of a public movement.


End file.
